This just in: Bisexuals are really no different from anyone else. And before you say anything — yes, the above picture is not an accurate representation. But hey, it got your attention (our’s too).
And yet there are misconceptions about being bi that come up again and again — that they’re gay and haven’t realized it yet, oversexed, confused or incapable of intimacy.
We’re not going to go too far into why that’s all complete nonsense — we wanted to hear from guys who are getting first-hand experience.
Here’s what guys are Whispering about dating bi:
How about we take this to the next level?
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Craig Baker
I love my Bisexual boifriend! 😀
Gus Anderson
You live in constant fear that if the going gets tough in a society where “gay is bad” that your bi-guy will get tired of fighting the good fight and switch to being with a girl because it is easier.
s312g
I wouldn’t mind being with someone who is bi. I’d feel insecure. It’s not that I think he would cheat, it’s just the what-ifs. It would hurt if he wanted an open relationship (which I’m not necessarily opposed to if I was with a gay man) and wanted to sleep with women. And if we were to break up it would hurt if he got with a woman.
Ben Stimpson
So… if the above photo is not an accurate description, why even choose it? Surely the casual reader going through might look at the headline and the picture and mutter and keep on scrolling…
AL Quin
Tanya Emily Garza there should be one for pansexual lol
Billy Budd
I have never been in a relationship with a bi guy, but I have fucked many married guys I met on the internet. They were mostly awesome in bed and very grateful to me for giving them a gay experience.
Marky
Bi men do the EXACT SAME THING. So can we make these articles a little more well rounded?
Gay, bi and straight men are all the same. Anyone who thinks differently is an idiot.
Jim Philbrick
A real bi dude likes both men and women equally so it shouldn’t be any different than a gay guy being with another gay guy, if he loves you he loves JUST you. Problems occur with the fake bi guy who says he’s bi to have sex with guys but feels he has to marry a woman to be culturally acceptable
bottom250
Sweethearts they could do me but I wouldn’t have a relationship with a bi guy.
Paco
I don’t understand the fear that they will dump you for the opposite sex when you probably have a greater chance of another gay guy disrespecting your relationship and going after them. You get dumped either way.
Sand Nierenberg
Well my live in partner was married and had 3 children we have been happy for 12 years now we are together almost 24 7 as we run our business from home so I understand the insecurity fully but it’s like anyone else straight gay bi if someone falls in love with you it shouldn’t be an issue its same all around he loves you should be no cheating with anyone but I do understand that feeling all too well
BigG
A bisexual ALWAYS tends to like one sex a little more than the other. And its usually women. In bed, they have restrictions like not really into kissing or something stupid. Been with a lot of bi’s, and I can tell you that sex with a gay man is much better. I would never date a bi going forward. As a gay man, I deserve to be with a gay man. Yes they’re part of our community but let’s get real, it never works out the way its supposed to where the bi is truly 50/50 bi.
Stached1
@AL Quin: Pansexual is just another term for being bisexual.
@BigG: LMAO you’re a typical hypocritical biphobic gay man, and yes there are bisexual men who are 50/50.
Brian
Bisexuality is not defined by MMF threesomes despite the best efforts of the porno industry. Bisexuality is also not defined by promiscuity.
Women often feel threatened by male bisexuality. They are far less accepting of it than men are of female bisexuality. It’s a stark double standard which reflects a woman’s fear of the power of male sexuality and the idea that he has the capacity to turn away from her and towards a man for his comforts. It takes away her power.
I also don’t like the word “bisexual” because it suggests you are divided equally in your attractions to men and women. Most “bisexual” men are not attracted equally at all.
Angel Mendez
What I’ve noticed transgender people don’t have to worry in a relationship with a bisexual guy because most of the time he will never cheat or leave and this is what I’ve noticed about the LBGT dating scene and what I’m saying is very accurate
Pistolo
Well, of course gay men in relationships with bi men are going to feel at least a little anxiety.
Look, we all grew up being in the minority, being surrounded by mostly men we couldn’t have because they were straight, most of us probably hoped we could convert someone or gave in to wishful thinking. We couldn’t pass as “normal” or straight while still being authentic to ourselves, couldn’t pretend to have heterosexual inclinations. When you reach a certain age where YOU control your environment, you hope you can surround yourself with at least somewhat attainable men and have what everyone else has.
A bi guy, in contrast to that experience, could give you everything you wanted but also, potentially, become your adolescent nightmare of abandonment and isolation. It’s a scary thing.
James Rumsey
some of these are really pathetic
John Erick Casazza
I love my bisexual boyfriend too!
Misty Bolling
It’s very hard on your self esteem.
Robothedestroyer
It makes me kinda happy that the comments section did not just turn into a bunch of negative stuff about bi guys being closet gay dudes. The only bi sexual people I personally know are women but they have left me with a favorable idea of faithful bisexuals. I really like what @Pistolo put because I think a lot of the reason gay men are nervous with bi boyfriends is because of that fear of rejection from when we where younger. Good for you if you either don’t have those hang ups or have been able to look past them to love another :).
Goforit
If you are in a monogamous relationship, either he can be trusted or he can’t. It has nothing to do with what sexuality he identifies with.
Christopher Auker-Howlett
Labels labels boxes boxes constrictions constrictions blah blah. Love who you want, desire who you want, however, my only rule is be safe . X
DCguy
Most of the people making the comments on the post seemed less worried about their boyfriend being bi and more upset that either they were in an open relationship and didn’t want to be or that their boyfriend was talking a lot about how hot other people are.
That isn’t a bi thing, that’s a ” just tell your bf not to be a dick” thing.
Brian
Women have a great fear of male bisexuality because male bisexuality renders men very powerful and women very useless. There is nothing more powerful than a man who has the ability to turn away from his woman because he prefers the erotic comforts of a man.
I’m surprised that the men’s rights movements hasn’t embraced this power of men more fully. Male bonding – whether platonic or sexual – is a great antidote to feminism and women in general.
GC1985
@Brian: Woman bashing again? You hate women. You are a powerless little man. Was your mother that bad to you?
Sluggo2007
Lips that touch labia shall never touch mine. Yecch!!!!
bottom250
@Sluggo2007: Sweetheart I agree so much that is just so gross. Honey I think I am going to be sick
Josh447
Queerty, you just slammed bisexuals by limiting the comments to gay guys only in your post. The lack of voice is disingenuous and not appreciated.
Brian, your bathroom wall education is showing again. Shouldn’t you at least put the graduation plaque in your terribly smelly bathroom above your stopped up toilet for everyone to see?
scotshot
The porn industry has no agenda but for the fact that whatever they’re shoveling out, their agenda is money, money, money.
Whatever your agenda is, it’s not working. Again.
RJPinUSN
So, what is it like for a gay guy to date a bisexual guy. That is the question posed, so it seems reasonable that gay guys would be supplying the quotes in the article. It would be kind of stupid to ask a bisexual man what it is like for gay guys to date him, that would be a rather biased response. I have fooled around with plenty of bi guys in my single days, but I don’t think I would have the fortitude to date one. I have never met a bisexual guy who ultimately wanted to be with a man only. They always want that life with a wife and family, with guys on the side. Look at it this way, does he want kids? Almost all certainly do, and it is very difficult and expensive to be with another guy and have those kids. It is so much easier to just be with a woman, and kids will come. With women who are bisexual it is so much easier to create that family with someone of the same gender, there will always be plenty of guys available to donate sperm, a turkey baster is cheap.
kzen64
Sounds like most of the whispers are by people who are insecure.
If you are in a committed, monogamous relationship, it shouldn’t matter whether you are gay, straight, or bi. If you are in an open relationship, then it shouldn’t matter if you are gay, straight or bi.
Why would a gay guy be more anxious that their bi boyfriend finds women attractive. If he comments on another guy, are they less anxious (perhaps in the oh I would F him to (and with you.))
kzen64
@Josh447: Ummm, it asked “we wanted to hear from guys who are getting first-hand experience.” Didn’t see anything limiting it to gay guys.
And as a bisexual male dating another bisexual male, we are full of the same insecurities as anyone else, nothing seems different than dating a woman, or a gay male.
Stached1
@Sluggo2007: Why would anyone want to kiss you? Queens that have the whole ‘ewwwwwwww a woman’ mentality are silly.
spemat
I am bi and have only dated bi men… they are like any run of the mill regular guy… the two I loved were like my partner in crime. When we corrected these two breeders who were hitting on us because she kept saying we are gay when neither of us are, they got their queen friends to harass us and then sent her slobby out of shape breeder relatives to jump us when we said we wouldn’t mess with breeders and the queens were all excited but him and I beat their asses and he rolled back in to the restaurant and I beat the shit out of the queens and got cheered on by the restaurant and the owner grabbed both and threw them out on their face and they were all nailed for hate crimes…
I won’t date a paranoid gay man/hetero woman… or the rare bi bitch who hates bi men… I am set… some bi men only want gay or straight people and we don’t want them. When I was with the two I loved, I was committed. Same with women. I was in poly situations too… and FWBs are free reign. But we are bi and calling us either gets shot down. I think that gay men and straight women who seek out bi guys are creeps. Usually try to come on with a line like, “do you think you could meet a woman and fully give up men (or vice versa). I notice bi men size up their bi-ness… we call each other straight or gay as a way to say they are self haters. And when we argue, we’ll yell, “go find a breeder and have a gaggle of kids” or “put on the pink pumps” and queen it up bitch etc.
I am with a bi woman now… if we met the idea bi guy/girl couple, we’d totally have a group situation but most bi people are rainbow washed to feel guilty to be queens/dykey or they are the ones who when they land a straight girl think they are above us… etc and will rave over being called gay but not say shit about straight. Bi women are cool like bros for 2 weeks, hot and in love and then shark week comes… ugh… bi dudes crying over gay approval are just pathetic… most of these dudes who hate bi men are single angry queens always convinced they seduced a straight man… they hate gays too.
scotshot
@spemat: See a therapist.
ErikO
@spemat: I’m bisexual and I only have partnerships/relationships with other bisexual women and men.