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In the Twilight Gay Porn Flick, That’s Not Blood Dripping On Your Neck

From the Department Of Inevitable comes Twinklight, a gay porn film filled with vampires and, if you’re lucky, a Stephanie Meyer sacrifice. But this is not a movie spoof; it is, director Afton Nills’ trailer would have us believe, a real story about love, passion, betrayal, and temptation that just happens to feature twinks screwing. It debuts (not in theaters, but at smut shops) on June 30, lawsuits notwithstanding.

Alas, there was the missed opportunity of turning out a catchy tagline, like, “Suck on this,” or, “They might be dead, but they’re fully engorged,” or even “Blood is on the bathhouse floor.” Surely you can’ come up with something better?

By:           Ryan Tedder
On:           May 25, 2010
Tagged: , , ,

  • 36 Comments
    • Mike L.
      Mike L.

      Uh, yeah the blood’s a big turn off.

      May 25, 2010 at 12:56 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Aaron
      Aaron

      Cum would be better :)

      May 25, 2010 at 1:04 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Taylor Siluwé
      Taylor Siluwé

      I think I’m in love with this already. Maybe because if I squint really really hard I’ll see Robert Pattinson with his legs in the air getting his hole worked.

      ;-)

      May 25, 2010 at 1:05 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • eyeroll
      eyeroll

      REALLY?!?!?!

      May 25, 2010 at 1:18 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • christopher di spirito
      christopher di spirito

      Team Jacob.

      May 25, 2010 at 1:27 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Charlie Jackpot
      Charlie Jackpot

      what a load of bollocks

      May 25, 2010 at 2:24 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Brandon H
      Brandon H

      Am i the only one that found this disturbing? The sex came off as violent, and not violent hot, but violent scary and bad.

      May 25, 2010 at 2:25 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Alexander A.
      Alexander A.

      “That’s Not Blood Dripping On Your Neck”

      Ewww Queerty, you nasty. I thought we already had a gay “Twilight”… it was called New Moon.

      May 25, 2010 at 2:57 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Qjersey
      Qjersey

      How is this hot? The cast look like a bunch of partied out twinks at 6am

      May 25, 2010 at 3:12 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Ogre Magi
      Ogre Magi

      Nothing worse than porn that takes it’s self too seriously!

      May 25, 2010 at 3:21 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Scott
      Scott

      Pardon the obviousness of this comment but… This looks like the gayest thing since…Twilight.

      May 25, 2010 at 3:39 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Random Rashes
      Random Rashes

      Is this worse than bareback? Please Advise.

      May 25, 2010 at 4:32 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • BamBam
      BamBam

      Isn’t there already a soft-core gay vampire porn show? And it has hotter (not so “dead-eyed”) actors?

      http://www.heretv.com/the_lair/about

      May 25, 2010 at 4:40 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Pip
      Pip

      uh I don’t really want blood in my porn—especially twink porn. thanks.

      May 25, 2010 at 4:56 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
      PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS

      It sucks….. :-p

      May 25, 2010 at 4:56 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Suburban
      Suburban

      It wasn’t that bad. Some people just overreact.

      May 25, 2010 at 6:16 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      i think it looks pretty good, altho, the promo started to look repetitive. We get it, they are vampires, and they are biting people. Let’s move along. Of course, there might be nothing else to the film than the biting and the screwing.

      May 25, 2010 at 6:39 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • jason
      jason

      Porn is a sad and tragic industry. Behind the paid-for sex scenes, there’s often drug addictions, pimping, physical abuse and mental problems. We shouldn’t be enabling this industry.

      Stay well away from porn and you’ll become a better person.

      May 25, 2010 at 7:14 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Kevin (New Jersey, US)
      Kevin (New Jersey, US)

      This looks awful. And yeah, it takes itself WAY too seriously.

      May 25, 2010 at 7:15 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Tallskin
      Tallskin

      Yeah, I’ve had sex like that.

      It was nothing great

      But, now I’ve hung up my fangs

      May 25, 2010 at 8:19 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • sExplosion
      sExplosion

      no way
      it’s so bloody bad!

      May 25, 2010 at 10:25 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • stephen
      stephen

      *faints*

      May 25, 2010 at 10:31 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • nyc08
      nyc08

      FANGS + BJ’s = NOT SEXY!

      I’ll still watch it though…

      May 25, 2010 at 11:43 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • B
      B

      No. 19 · Kevin (New Jersey, US) wrote, “This looks awful. And yeah, it takes itself WAY too seriously.”

      It probably is awful, but sometimes a film takes itself far less seriously than the trailer. Trailers have gotten so bad that they actually discourage me from seeing films – they are designed to get your attention on a small screen like an iPhone or a TV set and are simply too much when seen in a theater.

      May 26, 2010 at 1:47 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Art
      Art

      what about the Twink Diaries? hah

      May 26, 2010 at 2:00 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • ossurworld
      ossurworld

      As we say at the birdwatcher’s club, Bullfinch!

      May 26, 2010 at 7:47 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Aaron in Honolulu
      Aaron in Honolulu

      Sorry, blood and sex don’t mix for me…

      May 26, 2010 at 8:34 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • The Artist
      The Artist

      Drugs and crime spreading on the street…people can’t find enough to eat…our kids can’t go out and play. That’s the state of the world today. How is this important, relevant or mildly entertaining? PEACELUVNBWILD!

      May 26, 2010 at 1:46 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Ogre Magi
      Ogre Magi

      How long till they make a porno out of this?

      May 26, 2010 at 3:07 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Atergoboy
      Atergoboy

      How about “Only werewolves do it doggy style.”?

      Or would that be the sequel?

      May 27, 2010 at 12:47 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Lincoln Rose
      Lincoln Rose

      Twinklight…exchanging bodily fluids @ a pornshop near you

      nah…

      “sucking off the next generation!”

      nah…

      Twinklight..these boys taste great and are less filling…no matter which end is up!

      May 27, 2010 at 4:40 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • LWJII
      LWJII

      I have a weird thing for vampires, I just might watch this.

      May 27, 2010 at 10:03 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • LWJII
      LWJII

      When I was a kid I would dream of a hot vampire coming through my window to get me, like Dracula. And trust me they wouldn’t nightmares… :)

      May 27, 2010 at 10:09 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Taylor Siluwé
      Taylor Siluwé

      Lol @ Lincoln Rose.

      Some people are taking this way too seriously. Don’t think of it so much as porn but as campy ‘horrotica’

      May 27, 2010 at 10:16 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Fred
      Fred

      Signs of true boredom there.

      May 28, 2010 at 3:51 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • daxxter
      daxxter

      God, could that be any worse? I counted at least twice bad actors looked right at the camera! Well, you get what you pay for. Luckily, they won’t be getting any of my money!

      May 31, 2010 at 9:19 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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