Big News in Gayville. And when we say “big,” we mean “a sort-of-famous E! network staple homo-journo plans on getting hitched”. No, not Steve Kmetko. No, not Mark Malkin. No, not even Ryan Seacrest. Give up? Ted Casablanca! (As if the headline didn’t tip you off.)
That’s right, everyone’s favorite toothy yet handsome columnist has accepted soon-to-be hubbie Jon Powell’s proposal. Or, at least, that’s what Defamer heard from Stony_Curtis who heard it from Casablanca’s The Awful Truth:
Which brings me to why I feel like Ms. Hilton today–kinda/sorta/maybe just a li’l. All legal and loony, really. See, my partner, whose name is Jon Powell, got all rather Paris Latsis when we were on a deserted Hawaiian beach.
Mind you, J. didn’t have a huge-butt rock with him, but, he did do something that’s often accompanied with such brilliant specimens: He proposed. And I do mean marriage… [And] I said yes.
So, get ready, Ah-nuld, you homo-bashing big-hair. Since the California legislature approved gay marriage, only to be vetoed by your fruit-served self (I mean, do you all know how many gays have serviced Schwarzenegger’s girlie coiffure alone?), I suspect my attention to your sorry and sagging behind will only increase during my engagement.
‘Cause a gossip columnist can’t live by love alone.
How romantic: a beach, a comparison to Paris Hilton and a threat to highlight a Governor’s political shortcomings. Mr. Casablanca truly is in love.
dan
isn’t it kind of gross that a guy as old as bruce bibby is making references to paris hilton when talking about his upcoming marriage? that is so old-dude-trying-to-be-cool-by-calling-guys-“bro.” course then again he’s rocking a comboverhawk so that kind of puts him at the back of the pack of cool right there…that and working for E.
el polacko
ted’s a cutie and tons of fun … mazel tov !
ggreen
Lots of luck to the BF living with a shrill Scorpio harpy like Ted/Bruce isn’t going to be easy. Ms Ted got sober with AA but kept the vicious Vodka tongue he was so infamous for.
Ash
They look like brothers.
stony_curtis
i’ve been with my boyfriend for almost 19 years, and people always tell us we look like brothers. can’t say it’s true; can’t say it’s not. but folks: can we just let them have their moment in the sun? when straight folks get married, we don’t cut them up behind their backs, right? Oh wait–yes we do. 😉
nystudman
Ever notice how all these demi-celebs make such a big deal about getting “married,” only to “divorce” three months later? Remember Leichen & Whatisname? Bob Paris & Rod? Ellen & Anne?
matt
Isn’t Jon a former porn star?
givemestrength
He’s a “former pornstar” now?
And…why would that matter? What adult hasn’t been a porn star at some point in their lives?