Straight for Pay

Anderson Cooper Giggles Gaily When Called a Closeted Gay

Anderson-Cooper-Live-cropOh, Andy. The jury’s still out on whether the careerist closet case can take a dick, but the Daily News‘ Gatecrasher column writes that he can certainly “take a joke.”

On Saturday night, the talk show host checked out “Standing on Ceremony: The Gay Marriage Plays” at the Minetta Lane Theatre, which stars Craig Bierko and Mark Consuelos.

Anderson? At a play about gay marriage? Hard to believe. BTW, Consuelos is Kelly Ripa’s sexy-as-fuck husband, and she’s totally cool with him kissing Bierko. In fact she finds it “voyeuristic and perversely sexy.” Isn’t Ripa more open with her kinkiness than BFF Anderson or what? Anyway, the item continues:

In one of the show’s short plays, a homophobic woman who’s a loosely based amalgamation of Republican presidential candidate Michele Bachmann and commentator Maggie Gallagher rants about gay people taking over everything that she holds dear. “I’m sorry,” the character says, “but the gay people can’t have marriage or Oprah or Anderson Cooper!”

When the line was uttered, a source tells us as a large portion of the audience turned to Cooper to check out his reaction, and found the “Silver Fox” laughing heartily. The source says Cooper, 44, also gave the play, which, sadly, will close Dec. 18, a standing ovation at the curtain call.

Actually, we gays are willing to make a deal. Straights, you can keep Oprah, but we want our Andy. Can we split marriage 50-50?