CBS Press Release Writer Not Getting Any

Queerty reader RJ sent us this unintentionally hilarious press release from a hard-up CBS press release writer touting how Late Late Show host Craig Ferguson is beating the soon-to-be-Tonight-Show host, Conan O’Brien in the ratings, and is narrowing the season-to-date gap.

So now you all have the image of Craig Ferguson mounting Conan and giving him herpes. No, no, think about it for a minute; that mane of thinning clown-red hair, Ferguson saying “You know you love it” in a lilting Anglo-Saxon accent.  Did we mention how much we love this job?