A trans man says he was tricked by his parents into going to India, where they arranged a sham marriage in an effort to “fix” him.
19-year-old Shivy (pictured) is an Indian citizen but has lived in California since three. He’s currently enrolled in the Neurobiology Program at UC Davis.
Related: Gay Indian Man Pens Heartbreaking Essay About Being Trapped In A Sham Marriage
In June, he and his mother got into an argument after he cut his hair short. As a result, Shivy’s mother confiscated his phone. Going through his text messages, she learned Shivy was transgender and that he had a girlfriend.
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“She was furious,” Shivy recalls in a video uploaded to YouTube, “and I didn’t feel safe at all.”
Not long after that, his mother told him his grandmother in India had suddenly become very ill and that he needed to go be with her. Shivy agreed. But halfway through what was supposed to be a two week trip, his family told him he not be returning to the U.S. Instead, he was being forced into an arranged marriage with another man in an effort to change him.
Related: Vindictive Wife In India Has Gay Husband Locked Away For Life, Feels Absolutely No Remorse
“After I went to India, [my mother] was quite hostile towards me both verbally and sometimes physically,” Shivy explains in the video. “She would say constantly, ‘Behave like a proper girl. You are not transgender. You are disgusting.'”
Shivy managed to escape his family’s clutches before the wedding. He sought assistance from the LGBTQ advocacy group Nazariya, who helped him find a lawyer and a safe place to live in Delhi.
“I feel so much safer with this police help that came out of this high court order,” Shivy says, “and I just hope I can successfully get my documents and be freed from my parent’s control.”
Watch him tell his heartbreaking tale in the video below.
h/t: Gay Star News
Bisexual-Transwoman
If this is true that’s not a good thing; but she or he can just refuse to get married as he’s an adult.
I know some Desi-American people who have older relatives like grandparents who did want them to have a traditional arranged marriage since that’s what they have; but their parents understand that they’re American, and even in India not everyone has an arranged marriage today.
msfrost
@Bisexual-Transwoman: It doesn’t work that way outside the US.
Bisexual-Transwoman
@msfrost: Yes it does, even in India today a lot of people there realize that “love marriages” or marriages that are not arranged are very common.
Jerry Green
Oh dear Lord! What some parents won’t do. Mine assured me they would do whatever it took to “fix” me. They weren’t thrilled at my response when I told them I wasn’t “broken” and therefor didn’t need “fixed”.