Paula’s Back on TV, Whitney’s Back in Rehab, and Crazy Is Back In Our Hearts

It’s big news in the Gay Icon/Diva department these days, and sometimes the news can be too much to handle. We’ve barely picked ourselves off the floor after Angela Bassett, the patron saint of kick-ass women,  announced that a sequel to “Waiting To Exhale” has been greenlighted by the Hollywood gods.

The title of the book is  “Getting to Happy,” and will reunite the entire delicious cast of divas from the first film–including a return to the big screen for, dare we to say it, Whitney Houston.  Filming hasn’t even begun and we are already exhausted from the impending on-set drama.

To prep for a major movie role, some starlets hire a trainer or go on a diet; apparently Houston is taking the role seriously, by planning a cleansing of her lymphatic system with a trip to rehab. It’s an “out-patient” program, meaning it’s like rehab-lite, so it’s presumably Houston’s good-faith effort to make sure the film goes well. Although at this point, Houston’s been to rehab so many times, it’s like she’s taking a trip to the spa. Does Houston realize that “Betty Ford” and “Elizabeth Arden” are not the same thing?

Speaking of crazy women with devout gay fan bases, Paula Abdul has officially signed on the dotted line to return to TV, judging one of the now-indistinguishable talent contests that are broadcast every night.

In news that surprised no one, Abdul has joined X Factor, Simon Cowell’s reality-competition program that’s a big hit in the U.K. After Abdul was canned from “American Idol,” and Cowell immediately jumped off that sinking ship, she took a pop culture time-out and disappeared for a bit; she then returned for a shortened season of her own dance competition show, “Live To Dance,” which was tepid in the ratings but proved Abdul can hold herself together these days. Because really that’s what that boring dance show was about–she was just showing off for her beloved Simon.

So far things with “X Factor” seem to be progressing in a stable manner, which is disappointing, but we have high hopes that the pressure will once again get to her and she’ll start slurring her words again. Because that’s all people really care about now, all the good singers are on The Voice anyway.

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