James Franco’s Penis (Cake), Jason Collins’ Clueless Ex-Fiancée & More!

– 50 Shades of Delicious! James Franco celebrated his birthday the only way James Franco — and kinky gay men/bored suburban housewives — would with an S&M birthday cake. Ben Wa balls and all. We wonder who was the lucky fella who volunteered for that cake mould…

Arrow‘s John Barrowman has an enviable job. Some girls get all the luck.

lilo-prehab– So many days in rehab, so many clothes to choose from. Here’s Lindsay Lohan prehabbing. If you look closely, you can see the remains of her last assistant.

– While the Chris Pine-Zachary Quinto bromance is adorable — and at least partly gay — it still pales in comparison to Hiddlesworth.

– The web series Husbands now has a comic book.

– Well, Mariah Carey‘s never been known for her subtlety. The diva and her child-husband shut down Disneyland to renew their wedding vows.

– We nailed every one of these. Literally. Hiyo!

Jason Collins was once engaged to a woman and said woman had no idea he was a gay. We’re guessing the constant  missed lay-ups and botched free throws in the sack didn’t tip her off, then?

– Noted no-fuck-giver Miley Cyrus sexed it up for V Magazine.  Apparently someone took the day off from twerk.

– In case you missed it, here’s Lucille Bluth’s submission for Mother of the Year: