SC Principal Who Planned to Resign Over Gay-Straight Alliance Changes His Mind After Realizing THERE ARE NO JOBS

Ben Bernake called it right when he said “There are no atheists in foxholes and no ideologues in financial crises.” Irmo High School principal Eddie Walker is calling a mulligan on his plan to resign in protest of his school establishing a gay-straight alliance. The State reports that:

Lexington-Richland 5 interim superintendent Herbert Berg received a letter from Walker this week “indicating his desire to remain at Irmo High School,” district spokesman Buddy Price said Thursday.

Like other employees, Walker’s contract will be up for renewal in the spring, Price said.

In May, Walker wrote a letter to the school community stating his strong disagreement with the formation of a gay-straight club at the school. His letter indicated he believed the club would be somewhat sexual in nature and that, given his religious beliefs, he couldn’t lead a school that conflicted with the idea of an abstinence-based education.

Of course, that was before the Global Financial End Times overwhelmed his fears that supporting a bunch of gay and straight teens talking about how they can keep their school from becoming another hate crime or suicide statistic would bring about all the things he read would happen in the Left Behind series. After all, the Biblical Apocalypse is sort of cool, with its demons and Tribulation Forces running about; whereas the actual thing turns out to just involve a lot of sitting on your ass waiting for an unemployment check to come.

Walker’s change of heart came just at the right time. Today’s news that the unemployment rate is up to 6.7% means that while Principal Walker will, assuming the Superintendent allows him to keep his job, be forced to support his school’s Gay-Straight Alliance, he’ll be spared, at least for a while, from joining the hordes of wandering hobo principals that will shortly be roaming across the plains and valleys of our country, handing out detentions to random passerby and calling for pep rallies that nobody will ever attend.

Unless of course, Irmo decides to accept its homophobic high school principal’s resignation and hire someone who will support all his students equally, which is what they should do– and that’s a bit of advice you can take to the bank.