party bois

The Crazy Messed Up Sex Romp That Will Be This Weekend’s Black Party

Have your friends been telling you stories over the years about their Black Party shenanigans, with tales of their annual NYC late night (slash early morning) partying growing more debaucherous, leaving you wondering whether they’re just making shit up? Then you obviously haven’t heard about what went down at the Roseland Ballroom, where drugs are infused with sexual liberation for one giant spectator orgy for the senses.

Salon‘s Thomas Rogers (the online mag’s deputy art director, heh) went to a recent Black Party. And lived to tell about it.

So, at 1 a.m. on a chilly March night, I arrived at the Roseland Ballroom with a mix of trepidation and excitement. Over the course of the next hour, the venue’s enormous dance floor filled up with thousands of sweaty, shirtless men, mostly clutching water bottles to offset their party drug-induced dehydration and dancing wildly to the loud techno music. The attendees were mostly in their 30s and 40s, eagerly showing off their gym-built bodies. The atmosphere was intense, but didn’t seem particularly crazy.

Then I felt a hand in my pants. One of the massive bar areas on the second floor had been turned into a makeshift darkroom. And as I walked a few feet into the dim lighting, I bumped into a group of men getting a blow job from a kneeling figure, though I could only make out vague shapes. In a way, it was exactly the commitment-free sex I’d been eager to try. But as their fingers inched their way into my underwear, and their hands got more and more aggressive, I realized I wasn’t even remotely turned on. I was just uncomfortable. This was nuts: I wasn’t going to have sex with a man, let alone a group of men, whom I couldn’t even see.

The atmosphere grew increasingly debauched. People had sex in every nook and cranny. On the second floor, two enormous porn stars, including artsy French actor (and Salon Man on Top) François Sagat, had oral sex in front of 50 or 60 people. Then they urinated on each other, splashing on the surrounding audience. On the ground floor, a long banquette was filled with dozens of men openly masturbating.

[…] I remember the exact moment I realized it was time to leave the sex party and go home. It was 7:30 in the morning, and I was standing in front of a bunch of cots filled with piles of naked men. A man dressed in a leather jacket emblazoned with the words “human urinal” was next to me, a funnel strapped to his face. And as I stood there contemplating the circumstances that had led me to this place, a man wearing nothing but a harness and underwear staggered down the hallway and accidentally pressed up against me. “Oh my God!” he exclaimed to his friend, as his wet skin rubbed up against my arm. “Some guy must have pissed ALL OVER my shoulder!”

[…] Then, around 5 a.m, I witnessed a scene that remains seared into my memory. A group of a hundred or so men had gathered around the pool table near the main stage and were watching four men, one wearing a cat mask and another dressed in a boy scout uniform. The boy scout first poured the contents of a beer bottle into the man in the cat mask, who was lying down on the table. The cat masked man shot the contents (and not with his mouth) back out onto onlookers. The boy scout then got rid of the bottle in favor of other implements; first a pool cue — handle first — then four pool balls. As I walked away, I saw him prepare to insert one more object: a magic eight ball.

This year’s festivities begin tomorrow night. And won’t end until sometime Sunday night. Well, if you’re lucky: I have plenty of friends whose Black Party experiences have been with them, and their medical health professional, for years.

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  • Derek Washington


  • kayla


  • Adonis-of-Fire

    It just sounds like a lot of piss. How can anyone find metabolic waste sexy? Ridiculous.

  • Spike

    Gotta love the way the gay community, and encouraged by re-posting of this article by Queerty, passes judgement on it’s own. Reminds me of the standard line, if you don’t support gay marriage, don’t marry some one of your same sex.

    Shouldn’t the same apply to the Black Party, if you don’t like what goes on at the Black Party, don’t go . . . ??? But alas, what fun is it if you can’t pass judgement and speculate about all the STD that will be passed around?!!? Curious why similar such articles don’t get posted prior to the White Party btw. Just saying. But then again the White Party only attracts virginal Davey Wavey 20something types who sip on flavored Vitamin water and stay chaste the entire weekend.

    Give me a break.

  • EdWoody

    @Spike: You said: “Shouldn’t the same apply to the Black Party, if you don’t like what goes on at the Black Party, don’t go . . . ???”

    No-one has said anything contrary to that, so what are you getting upset about? Everyone passes judgement on everyone else. It’s the way of the world. The problem comes when you try to enshrine that judgement into law. Nobody here is doing that – they’re just saying what they find personally objectionable.

  • Jeff

    Um hello? Tha 80’s were more wild than that.

    These are adults who should be able to do what they want and play how they want to as long as its consensual.

  • adman

    Why is a fetishist event cast as a solely gay phenomena by the “straight” media, hmmmm? Slap this bitch and fuck Salon. That stupid rag has been a sinkhole since the editorial started marginalizing Glenn Greenwald. Fuck Salon, especially that Joan monster. Our politics = your appetite for salacious gossip? Got it. Just wanted to make that clear, Joan.

  • Rick Gold

    Remove any mention or appearance of/by François Sagat and it sounds like a lovely time.

  • Matt

    sounds hot wish I were going.

  • Spike


    Good point in reference to Salon being the str8t media. Curious though given the headline for the article over on Salon is . .

    The gay sex event that made me a prude

    And the puritanical Queerty headline is . .

    The Crazy Messed Up Sex Romp That Will Be This Weekend’s Black Party

  • Peter

    I really hope someone videotapes this crap and lets the whole world see what the gay community is really about. I don’t really care what you people get up to. I just don’t understand why you guys are so determined to destroy traditional marriage and family. Deep down inside you all know that all you guys care about is no strings attached sex (hence the reason so many of you are still getting infected annually with HIV) and yet, you hate traditional living people and the family so much you will lie and pretend you want to get married and force little children to live in the midst of your filth. Screw whomever you people want but leave marriage and innocent little children out of it. Is that too much to ask?

  • andy

    Peter if you think one party in a large city somehow represents the entire gay community, then you must go through life making all kinds of dubious assumptions. I live in nyc with my husband of 19 years and have never been to a black party or any other circuit event, but I have no complaints against those who want to engage in adult activity of this nature. It’s just not for me.

  • Peter

    @andy: 19 years of an open relationship does not impress me. and please don’t lie and say that you have been monogamous, because I know very well that gay men are completely incapable of monogamy. As I said, I really don’t care about what you people choose to do with each other, but please leave marriage and the family alone. I hope you didn’t force any innocent children to be a part of your farce. If not, then I really don’t have a problem with you and your so-called partner.

  • andy

    You don’t know me or my husband so stop making dubious assumptions.You must be trolling for an argument. Let’s film the goings on of a strip joint and then say that’s how all straights are???? Or film the goings on of an escort service and declare it representative of the entire straight culture??? Give me a break. Dude worry about your own marriage and life before you start throwing stones at others.

  • FromHouston

    You know, this has actually been bothering me lately. I hear alot of bitching about all the inappropriate behavior of gay men and all their drugged up careless hedonistic parties (Black Party/White Party every fucking color in the rainbow party), and this judgement and wagging of fingers comes from other gay men for the large part. Mostly because only gay men care all that much about all the dirty details of such parties, along with the small group of ultra conservatives that try and gleen the worst of the worst information they can get their hands on of such parties and use it as ammunition BUT thats another issue altogether. The issue that I’ve been having a hard time dealing with lately is why is it okay to wag the finger at todays gays but back in the day every manner of crazyness went on constantly it wasn’t limited to circuit parties or a gay pride event etc. etc. Nobody says, how dare those guys fucked in dark rooms and in alley ways and in central park and on the infamous docks and everyone was high out of their mind most of the time as well. Nobody says, how careless and stupid those men were because it was “okay” exploration and experimentation for those men. Everyone says, nobody knew about the coming epidemic of aids BUT really? Really? Are you really gonna sit there and say that when gonnohrea/syphliss/herpes/anal warts were all being reported in massive outbreak for a long time before aids came along? So gay men of that era just had no idea that all the mass of std’s that were spreading didn’t mean a damn thing…let the party go on and on and on. They partied, probably even harder than any of todays gay men do at these circuit party’s…..but everyone wants to say oh it was experimentation and nobody knew about anything back then so it was okay. Really? But today, what…its not “okay” anymore to “experement and explore” sex in every shape and form you choose. I just think its hypocracy to condemn gay men today for just doing what everyone does at some point, indulging…..and probably over indulging in things that people say they shouldn’t. I’m not saying its right or great or even good. I just find the wagging of the finger and saying, no…no… thats a bad boy to the younger generation stupid and hypocritical. No one is forced to go to these parties, to see these parties or to even know about these parties. Let them do as they want, they are grown men. Stop gossiping about the scandalous event and talk about something that actually is part of your life. Unless you report on each of these events every damn year because you KNOW quite a lot of gay men fantasize about participating in such parties….just once, just to say hey yea I did that. I partied and I walked away from it, just like all those damn guys did in the start of the gay movement…….they partied till they thought maybe it was time to stop. Let the next generation find their limits and do as they please. I don’t know anyone who has ever listened to an older person bitch and say after…hmmmmm I won’t do as I please because that older person bitching at me made me re-think how I want to live my life.

  • Charlie

    @Peter: Ok Peter hon, I’m sorry that your camp counselor from JR high didn’t call you back but let’s just remember that straight people have all sorts of fun with sex parties, swingers events, and BDSM festivals – we haven’t cornered the market on weird sex events.

    And we often successfully raise all sorts of children that were abandoned by their heterosexual parents.

  • Peter

    @Charlie: Sorry to disappoint you, but I’m 23 years old and I know what I’m talking about. As for kids raised by gays, there isn’t enough data yet, to know how that’s going to turn out. What I do know is that children need a mom. Gay men forcing little kids to be a part of their debauched existence is just selfish.

  • Codswallop

    The “gay” male behavior everyone bitches about is really MALE behavior. It wouldn’t be so bad if they didn’t act like “straight men don’t do those things!” but that’s bullshit. The difference is you usually have to PAY women to participate, either through stripping or prostitution.

    Not that I’m claiming any of this stuff is some laudable cultural event, just that it’s hypocritical to wag fingers at gay men and scold “For SHAME!” from their moral pedestals, like straight men are saints.

  • Adonis-of-Fire

    No, we won’t let little children out of this, we will pervert your (and I mean YOUR) children, rape them and kill them, and when you get home and see his tiny body dripping cum and blood and scream from horror, we’ll come from the shadows and rape you too. But we won’t kill you, instead we’ll infect you with HIV and let you agonize slowly…

  • Charlie

    @Peter: We have been providing children with teams of lesbian moms for a long time and yes there has been enough data.

  • Peter

    @Adonis-of-Fire: I don’t have any children, and the way the world is headed, I’m not sure I will ever have any. As someone who was once led astray, but thankfully found my way back on the right path, I know the kind of evil that is out there in the world. Who in their right mind would want to bring a child into this screwed up world? I would rather adopt a little kid who needs a home. But right now, I’m just trying to finish college and keep my life in the right direction. However, your comment is disgusting, but typical of your kind.

  • Charlie

    @Peter: Aha! so I wasn’t too far off the mark with the camp counselor comment.

    P.S The World says thank you for not breeding.

  • jason

    The Black Party is one reason why gay people are in decline. It’s just another excuse for promiscuous sex. This behavior is no different from the behavior of straight-identifying men who go on sex cruises or visit the Playboy Club. In other words, it’s just as sleazy.

    It’s further proof that the modern gay scene is built on a sex act. Ultimately, such movements can’t survive.

  • Codswallop

    @jason: So, following that “logic,” I guess it’s fair to say that since one of the leading causes for death among pregnant women is murder by their husband or boyfriend that heterosexuality is doomed because it’s built on female murder? Or that since so many wealthy men marry young “trophy wives” that straight marriage really is just legally condoned and protected prostitution.

    Frankly that last one is a lot more truthful than saying the gay community and identity are built on a sex act.

  • RomanHans

    Jason & Peter, you’re shit on a gay man’s shoe. You’re that particular brand of idiot that doesn’t realize how stupid they are. Please, think for a few more years before you deign to share your opinions, because otherwise you’re just going to spread the idea that you’re both idiots.

    In high school you’d have learned that you can’t generalize about an entire population based on .01%. The Black Party says absolutely nothing about gay people that the Playboy Mansion doesn’t say about straights.

  • RomanHans

    P. S. to the article’s author: you should probably stay away from sausage fests if you don’t like pork. Hope this helps.

  • jason

    It’s a question of honesty and integrity.

    When sex parties are advertised under the gay rights notion, it’s a form of fraud. The gay rights notion, by definition, should be about achieving progress on gay rights, not having orgasms and pissing on each other in a smelly dark room. The Black Party is no more indicative of gay rights than going to the toilet to do a dump.

    When the rights notion cedes to the sex club notion, you know we’re in trouble.

    Keep in mind that somebody is making a lot of money out of this. Like a pimp making money from a prostitute, the people who run gay sex parties are basically doing the same.

  • Peter

    @RomanHans: I have the right to say whatever I want, just as you do. I know what the gay community is really about, and what it’s about at its heart is drugs and sex, nothing more, nothing less. That is fine, but I find it incredibly disingenuous when some gays pretend that they care about marriage, when the truth is they are simply trying to destroy the traditional family. You compare the Black Party and such to Playboy mansion etc. for heterosexuals, the difference is that Hugh Hefner and his ilk and the playboy mansion is not at the heart of heterosexual America. However, at the heart of the gay community are events like the Black Party, gay pride parades etc. It’s all about getting high and having sex with strangers. Unfortunately in my mid to late teens I fell away from my family and was influenced to enter the gay world, I almost died. Thankfully with the help of my parents and faith leaders, I have gotten my life back on the right track. I will never stop talking about what I know to be true.

  • Jonathan

    @Peter: YOU are 100% Right!!

  • RedickkJohnson

    I think it’s perfectly cool if guys want to be as kinky and sleazey as they want to, but can’t kink be done without all that dangerous fluid exchange?

  • Labinot Ajeti

    shume mire pask dal
    they should come to Prishtine :)

  • caffesilvia


    First thing: I’m actually quite glad that your life is back “on track.” I can’t imagine what a 15 year-old would do if he just stumbled into the gay social scene without bearings. (I’m going to go on a limb and infer that you didn’t grow up knowing any *responsible* gay role models who could have steered you from danger.)

    Second thing: Your generalizations are dead wrong. It’s not really your fault, though. You’ve suffered some sort of trauma and have a limited range of experience. These factors always distort one’s perspective.

    The fact is, you can’t safely generalize about a population as large as GLBT people because it’s simply too diverse. For every drug-addled slut you might point to, I could point to a nerdy research librarian or a chaste rabbinical student struggling with his sexuality. I could, and can, also point to several real-world couples I know who are monogamous, loving, and quite frankly have low sex drives. You don’t know such people, so, naturally, you don’t realize they exist.

    Third thing: Your generalization is false but your experiences aren’t. There are some shockingly dangerous elements out there, and yes, they’re more prevalent among GLBT people. I’m sorry you fell into them, but the onus is on you to recognize the shortcomings of your own perspective and to avoid drawing conclusions about people you’ve never even met.

    Final thing: Remember that gay people are independent, autonomous people who (mostly) have entire lives that have nothing to do with being gay. When they’re identified as a group, it’s because their one common trait — sexual orientation — is selected out. This tends to give the false impression that gay people are all about sex. In reality, it only seems that way because sex is the variable implicitly under inspection any time you lump all gay people together as a group.

    You seem like a decent, if misguided, person. I hope you’ll grow into a more tolerant and more realistic understanding of the world.

  • HeroQueero

    @Peter: Wow. What stereotypical world are you living in? Me and my partner have been together for 4 years and been happily committed to ONLY EACH OTHER! I know dozens of gay couples who are not only monogamous but have raised healthy adults who are happy and heterosexual. You can’t say that what you say is true unless you have personally talked to EVERY GAY PERSON ON THE PLANET, can you? And does your faith teach you to make general assumptions and lump everyone into the same stereotypical group? Sorry you had a bad experience being gay but to blame others for YOUR personal choices is just a cop-out. You can say that others influenced you or coerced you but when you come down to it, YOU MADE THE FINAL CHOICE! I could easily say that all evangelical pastors are hypocritical cheating husbands or that all priests molest little kids but I’m more open minded and realistic than that. I don’t condone unsafe sexual practices like the ones that happen at the Black Party but then what adults choose to do with other consenting adults is none of my business. You’re 23 and you “know what you’re talking about”? HA! Maybe you should live more than 2 decades on this planet before you claim to know more than others who have been here longer than you because it just makes you look like an uninformed egotistical kid.

  • Shannon1981

    You have been watching too much Queer as Folk. Not all gay people live that way. In fact, most of us, while we might have brief flirtations with such lifestyles, quickly get away from it. We live normal lives. We go to school, go to work, some even go to church, and hang out with family and friends just like straight people do. We develop normal relationships. They just happen to be with people of the same sex versus people of the opposite sex. Get away from sensationalized internet articles, sex lounges, and bad gay tv. It has rotted your brain.

  • Peter

    @HeroQueero: I do take full responsibility for my sins. If I didn’t I almost five years drug free and completely sober. Instead I would be dead either from an unintended drug over-dose or intentional suicide. I know how lucky I am, that my parents were very supportive in getting me the help that I needed and that they didn’t turn their backs on me. I’m even luckier to be back on track with my education and not have to worry about tuition etc. I don’t really want to bash gay people, but the truth is the truth. I just see it as I call it. If you are truly in a monogamous relationship then that is a miracle and you are a very very rare breed of gay man, but please do not bring innocent children into the equation. You are choosing to live the gay lifestyle, those children wouldn’t have any choice.

  • jim

    The “party” circuit started in the early to mid-1980s. It was billed as an AIDS benefit. Yet, somehow the AIDS organizations and et. al. received very little money. What has always happened is that the drugs take over. Men have unsafe sex in a “benefit” for AIDS organizations. There have been several men who have died at these events, taken to the hospital and are in drug/alcohol induced comas, become infected with the HIV, and etc.

    I am all about freedom for the gay community and realize that every adult has the right to live life the way they choose (that’s within the laws, but really – Wake up, circuit boys. Have fun but do it safely. To the organizers who make a ton of money off this, please stop billing it as an AIDS benefit, but as an spreading AIDS party.

    I agree with the others about this not being just a gay thing. The Roman Orgies that are very famous in history were about all kinds of sex,food and alcohol binge.

  • Tori

    @Peter: If you’ve, “found the light”, why are you on this site? If I didn’t like gay people the last thing I would do is go on a gay site.

  • unclemike

    I used to be Mormon, but I don’t keep showing up on Mormon websites telling them how wrong and evil they are.

    So, Peter, if you really feel like you’re on the right track now, continually showing up here is a funny way of living that right track.

    Just saying.

  • jason

    I just think that a lot of modern gays think that being gay means subscribing to the “anything goes” lifestyle. You can see it in every level of the gay social scene. There’s body worship, leather worship, bear worship, sauna culture…you name it. It’s as if the permissiveness notion has completely overtaken us. It’s a sordid cesspool.

    Whenever permissiveness takes over, it harms us. It takes the moral basis out of our community. It reduces us to a series of indulgent fetishes.

  • scott ny'er

    @Peter: What’s sad is you’re blaming the “gay life” for YOUR own reckless behavior. And instead of looking in the mirror and really, I mean REALLY admitting to yourself that YOU were responsible for YOUR actions, you use gay people as your scapegoat. On top of that, you probably have some religious folk/parents brainwashing you and because they helped you in your time of need, you are more susceptible to them.

  • RedickkJohnson

    But, again, I don’t think fetishes or kink or lots of sex (kinky or non-kinky) is how you can guage a person’s worth or not. Ben Franklin had a mistress on every street in Paris; Percy Shelley, Lord Byron, Baudelaire, Christopher Isherwood, all associated with drug-induced kinky sex; Oscar Wilde liked dirty working-class boys; Marlene Dietrich numerous lovers of both sexes; Toulouse-Lautrec adored prostitutes; T.E. Lawrence was turned on by getting kicked around by a Turkish soldier; and we could go on and on. But….I think we very well can frown on unsafe sexual activity. Sex is fine, but having unprotected anonymous sex in these days is just, medically, morally, selfish and irresponsible.

  • Mark


    I really hope someone tapes a LDS wedding and lets the whole world see what the straight community is really about. I dont really care what you people get up to. i just dont understand why you overzealous straight men are so determined to destroy traditional monogamous marriage and family. Deep down inside all you care about is subjugating women and having tons of unprotected sex with many different women leading to tons of children.(hence the reason so many of you are getting put in jail and having oprah specials annually.) and yet, you hate traditional living people and the family so much you will lie and pretend you want to get married to several different women and force little children to live in the midst of that filth and stress. Screw whomever you people want but leave marriage and innocent little children that you give birth to out of it. Is that too much to ask?

    Making rash generalizations about the masses based on the actions of a minority is fun everyone should try it, its like an ad lib.

  • Jonathan

    @HeroQueero: You and your friends represent a very small minorrty of the gay community where standards of long-term monogamy are largely absent.

  • Jonathan

    @HeroQueero: As opposed to an egotistical uniformed adult.

  • Jonathan

    @Shannon1981: Check your census data and you’ll discover you are terribly misinformed about the real state of gay men in America today.

  • Jonathan

    @Tori: Everyone has to agree with you in order to visit this site. Are you kidding? I don’t even know you and I already think your an idiot, but that’s not going to stop me or you from patronizing Queerty.

  • Shannon1981

    @Jonathan: LMAO hunny I know more gay men than I can count. I go by what I see in my life, thank you very much. Also, I’m a lesbian. I live gay life. Granted, not the life of gay men, but still. I know bunches of both. I don’t need a census to tell me what I see.

  • scott ny'er

    what i find interesting is the people who claim to not be gay or are against gays… and yet they are looking at threads on Queerty. And a Black Party thread of all things. Why spend the time here at Queerty? Shouldn’t you be at church or in bible study or anywhere but on a GAY website?

  • mattsy

    I went to my first Black Party in 1992-I tripped on E and danced to Makin Happy by Crystal Waters. I was 21. I had a great time but was disappointed I didnt get to see anyone get fisted or pissed on like I had heard about. Oh well.

  • Tori

    @Jonathan: Well I’ll definitely have trouble sleeping because some random doesn’t think highly of me. I think your Peter under a different name, what I said made perfect sense.

  • Peter

    @Tori: Why would I pretend to be someone else, when I have absolutely no problem saying what I believe? Why would I waste my time creating another name, for what purpose? As for why I choose to visit Queerty, well it is a complicated subject. I did not magically become straight. I don’t believe that I can change my orientation. I do however believe that it’s a choice to act out on my feelings/live the lifestyle, and I have chosen to not do that based on my faith and desire to have a healthy family life(reading a lot of the articles on this site reinforces my decision, since they tend to be about porn stars getting HIV, some sex-crazed older (just pathetic and sad) guy getting killed by some young guy he was trying to have sex with, drug filled sex parties and sex cruises, etc. etc. etc.)

    I think if Queerty doesn’t want me to comment they could just ban me from this site. Though I don’t think there is any reason to do that, unlike other people who have insulted me by using rather vulgar language etc., I think that I have stated my opinions rather politely.

    And by the way, many out and proud gay people leave comments on Christians sites, (many of them very hateful and nasty)saying how they completely disagree with that point of view and they are not banned.

  • jason

    What many of you in the gay community don’t realize is that, while you’re having fun, there’s a small number of businessmen who are making a lot of money off you. These businessmen are marketing sleaze under the gay rights banner, effectively bringing a shroud of dignity to their money-making sleaze events. The whole thing is a confidence trick designed to reap profits from the cornered gay market.

    Before you go and have your fun, think about what you’re doing. You’re being exploited, basically. You’re spending an awful lot of money on sexualized fun and drugs because you don’t have children on which to spend it.

  • justiceontherocks

    @Peter: So many generalizations, so little sense. You draw assumptions based on your own behavior and assume that everyone who is gay behaves as “badly” as you did.

    Sorry, junior. You didn’t use drugs or party hard or feel like killing yourself because you are gay. Lots of straight people do the same thing. And from what we’ve read here nothing has gotten better for you – you’re just delusional in a different way.

    You’re only 23 and what you know about life and people would fit on the head of a pin. I hope you grow up soon.

  • tallskin2

    Ah, poor little peter, you’re a sky pixie worshipper. How sweet and quaint.

    Obviously you suffered disappointment in a love affair. Better luck with the next one. Keep looking, don’t give up. And don’t leave it until you’re middle aged and living in an unhappy hetero marriage with a wife who hates you before you seek a man to love.

    As Cheech and Chong once, so memorably, put it: “I was all fucked up on drugs until I met the lord, now I’m all fucked up on the lord”

  • Oh boy

    I feel the need for an antibiotic just reading that.

  • Soupy

    My partner and I of 16 years have never attended a circuit party. We simply aren’t the type. We aren’t wildly attractive or gym queens or druggies, or sex addicts. By this point in our lives we soldier on in a largely sexless marriage without any desire to stray. I can’t think of anything more old fashioned and “straight” then that. Just like my parents. Most of our friends are in their 30s and 40s and none of them into any kind of “scene”. We are boring, but happy.

  • Soupy

    Actually, the story reads like one of those hysterical, sensational cautionary tales from years ago, like “Reefer Madness”.

  • Jonathan

    @justiceontherocks: You are a fool and don’t know anything.

  • Jonathan

    @justiceontherocks: You are a fool and don’t know anything and I suspect the head of the pin your describing is about the size of your dick.

  • Shannon1981

    @Jonathan:Was that really necessary? Justiceontherocks is a healthy, well adjusted gay man who leaves intelligent comments on this site, and in this instance he happens to be right. In fact, you just re enforce how right he is when you have to resort to juvenile insults about his genitalia because you cannot come up with anything intelligent to say.

    Listen, you are on a gay site, with people who ENJOY BEING GAY. You have to understand that you will not change our minds. In fact, most of us will simply pity the likes of people like you and your buddy Peter here. And just because your brief time in gayville was like an extended version of the Black Party stereotype doesn’t mean anyone here lives that way. I admit I did, for 11 years, mind you. But no longer. I’m still gay though. It had nothing to do with being gay and everything to do with me being an idiot.

  • Peter

    @Shannon1981: Jonathan is not my “buddy”, please understand that. I don’t know this person, and I want to make it clear that I speak for myself and nobody else. Likewise, nobody else speaks for me. As for pitying me, I think that there are a lot of people who could better use your sympathies. For example; the people of Haiti, Japan and or Libya.

  • Jeffree

    Amazing how fast that one troll(Peter) & one nutjob (Jason&sockpuppets) can derail a whole thread. Peter is like our old troll pal Stanley just a week ago or so. All they manage to do is dumb down the conversation and make us defend ourselves against ridiculous accusations and forget what we’re here for.

    @Jason: The PLAYBOY club is your best idea of what sleazy straight men do for fun? You must be mentally still living in the 1990s.

  • Joe

    @Spike: Spike’s passing judgement on those that might pass judgement, so where does it start and end?

    I don’t care who does what to or on whom, so long as everyone is consenting. When STDs begin to work their way through the crowd then it’s a public health matter and your Consitutional right to privacy just ended. Play safe and no one gets hurt.

  • greenmanTN

    Whenever you see a report about “ex-gays,” like the recent Lisa Ling thing on the Oprah network, the “ex-gays” (usually men) always say, “Oh, being gay was AWFUL! There were all these DRUGS and it was all about irresponsible, unprotected sex! I was lucky to get out alive!”

    No, honey, that’s what YOU did! And you need to own up to it and stop lying about how it was the ONLY option because that’s pure, unadulterated bullshit. YOU spent all your time in dance clubs. YOU bought drugs and used them. YOU went out looking for and having promiscuous sex. Nobody forced you to do it and there WERE other options.

    If you needed religion to get over your addictions, whatever floats your boat. But there’s no need to add “being gay” to your little hate list because that wasn’t your problem. You COULD have hung out with people who weren’t only concerned with the next party or the next drug. You could have looked for a sane, stable relationship. But you didn’t, so don’t blame the gay community for YOUR actions.

    The way I look at it, if you’re a consenting adult you can go to all the circuit parties you want but it is SERIOUSLY stupid and irresponsible to have unprotected sex. But when you go to those parties by your own choice, you don’t get to blame anyone else for what YOU did!

    Maybe Jesus wants you for a sunbeam, but everyone else thinks you’re a little whiner who won’t take responsibility for your own actions, so I have my doubts.

  • Joe

    @Peter: OMG I was wish I were 23 and once again so sure of myself and what I know of the world. Life was much simpler in my 20’s.

  • Shannon1981

    @Peter: When I say buddy, I mean you two are speaking in the same vein and trolling for the same reasons. Forgive me if I am wrong, but I don’t think I am.

  • Jeffree

    These ex-gay guys who troll gay sites are really here to get their rocks off. If they paid ANY attention to their reparative thërapy they’d know that associating with known ho-mo-sex-u-als is a sure sign of relapse on the path to Glory over Gayness….

  • James

    Oh, Peter.

    The lady doth protest too much, methinks!



  • HeroQueero

    @Peter: O, Peter of little faith and knowledge, what exactly is the “gay lifestyle”? If you believe it’s partying, taking drugs, and having unprotected sex then I have two words for you: CHARLIE SHEEN.

    You need to step out of your uninformed little box and not make generalizations about people based on what you see in the media. I suppose you think all black men are criminals, all Asians are bad drivers, and that all Germans are Nazis, because that is what popular culture and the TV have shown you.

    And by the way, darling, I’ve read the Bible and Jesus dated a prostitute and had two daddies and he turned out okay, didn’t he?

  • HeroQueero

    @Jonathan: If you want to find examples of gay monogamous relationships I advise you to not base your research on gay clubs, bars, and parties, and take a look at gay couples in the WORLD COMMUNITY. Neil Patrick Harris, Elton John, Ellen DeGeneres, Chuck Palahniuk, and Wanda Sykes are all examples of gay folks in happy, committed relationships.

  • Peter

    @HeroQueero: Are you the one running this website? Because your nasty comment has disappeared, how did that happen? If you really are running this site please let it be known that myself and Jonathan are different people. As to your last comment addressed to me; No, I do not believe most black men are criminals, though it is a statistical reality that black men commit a disproportionate amount of crime when compared with their percentage of the population. I know for a fact that all Asians are not bad drivers because my very good friend Mike (who is Korean) is an excellent driver. Some Asians may well be bad drivers though. And all Germans are definitely not all Nazis. Since I have a penchant for Germany programming (with subtitles) and I find Germans to be very open minded people. Of course their are Germans who hold Nazi ideologies.

    I will say that sometimes I do get emotional and perhaps over generalize, but I still hold to the fact that the gay lifestyle for most people is very unhealthy and does more harm than good. I do not hate gay people, as it’s a sad fact that I myself am gay, though I choose not to live the lifestyle. I just find many gays very dishonest about the realities of their everyday lives. As for your crazy comments about Jesus, well they’re just disrespectful, trite and not really funny. Stop stealing other people’s material.

  • Soupy

    I think that Peter is Stanley. Remember him? He wrote in a very similar fashion and disappeared a while ago.

  • Jeffree

    @Soupy: “Peter” & “Stanley” are probably the same troll, as said in #61 Same puntuation, average sentence length, syntax, register, etc., not to mention a shared ignorance & disgust of gay “culture.” They just come here to wank and whine.

    Is probably not russian like you & me.

  • Jay

    I can’t wait to turn 21 and be able to attend one. I want to experience something at least one. This type of event will take me out of my comfort zone, but I like to explore and live life to the fullest. If anyone doesn’t approve of this type of lifestyle then deal with it.

  • HeroQueero

    @Peter: I’M DISRESPECTFUL? How about your “Christian” brothers and sisters who hold “GOD HATES FAGS” signs at funerals? Or your priests who molest and destroy the lives of children? Or your evangelists who cheat on their wife while she’s in the hospital for cancer? Or comparing gays relationships to bestiality? Or the Exodus chapter in the Bible that condones slavery and the selling of wives?

    And by the way, your comment about black men and crime is just plain bigotry. You wanna know a STATISTICAL AND HISTORICAL fact?
    Christians have MURDERED MILLIONS of people in the name of Jesus.

    I’m sure He would be proud.

    But I guess like all self-righteous zealots you only see fault with everyone else and not in your own backyard. You claim to be Christian but seem incapable of loving humanity unconditionally and taking the time to get to know everyone as individuals. I guess it’s far to easy (and lazy) to just lump everyone together into one generalized assumption.

    So if you’re really a Christian and don’t like what I have to say then FORGIVE me. Isn’t THAT what Jesus would do?

  • tallskin2

    Folks, just leave poor little peter alone. He’s obviously not very bright and shouldn’t be teased.

    And he’ll get all upset if you mock his christian death cult.

  • Peter

    @HeroQueero: Let me say that this will be my last comment on this particular post (I know that you are overjoyed!)–you never answered my inquiry into whether or not you were behind this site. I am not a member of, nor do I support the hateful tactics of the Westboro Baptist Church, which seems to me to be a family cult. I would never say that “God hates fags”, since that would mean that he hates me. I would hardly ever be audacious enough to speak for God and never once in any of my comments do I do that. I am also not Catholic.

    As for you accusing me of racism because I stated that black men committed a disproportionate number of crimes when compared with their percentage of the population. Well please take a look at the annual crimes statistics as compiled by the FBI, using state by state data:

    Stating a sad fact about black men and crime, does not mean that I hate black men or am a racist. You will also glean from the FBI statistics that men also commit a disproportionate (overwhelmingly) amount of crimes when compared with our percentage of the population, does stating that fact make me sexist against my own sex? Some people do not understand statistics and therefore get up in arms when facts are stated. Most black men DO NOT commit crimes, however, an alarmingly high percentage of criminals ARE black men.

    Beyond the politically correct mumbo jumbo there lies a reality that people can choose to ignore, but know that in ignoring, we cannot make an attempt to correct things. Black men for reasons way above my expertise, commit a disproportionate amount of crimes, I can only attempt to glean from cultural trends, educational and poverty statistics the reasons for this.

    Political correctness has also taken over when it comes to stating facts about gay men: that we are still being HIV infected at a disproportionately high rate when compared to our tiny percentage of the population. But to state this is to be hateful. To state that the gay lifestyle leads many, many men down a path of drug use and promiscuous sex (both high risk factors for HIV) is also apparently to be hateful. Everyone wants to pretend the reality isn’t reality because it makes you feel good but that isn’t going to get to the root of the problems that are putting gay men’s lives at risk.

    If a person wants to have a happy and healthy family life, or remain disease free, the facts are that they would have a better statistical chance choosing a traditional heterosexual relationship over the gay lifestyle, where ideas of “open relationships” etc. are accepted as a normal fact of life. Even gays who state that they wish to get married will turn around and admit that they have no intentions of being 100% faithful to their intended spouses, this in my opinion is making a mockery of marriage. Yes, I know that you will state the fact that heterosexuals engage in extra-marital affairs and also make a mockery of marriage, and they too should abstain from marrying, at least in the Church.

    I have absolutely no problems with having federally recognized civil unions that give all the rights of marriage so that persons both gay and heterosexual who disdain traditional monogamous marriage can enter into legally recognized unions with the partners of their choice. Perhaps the government should get out of the business of marriage altogether, who knows? Well I’ve rambled on long enough, and I’ve already stated things (in my previous posts) in a way that I now regret because of my sometimes high emotional state. So I will just stop.

    @Soupy: I am not Stanley, however I would truly appreciate it if you would direct me to topics that he’s posted on so I can compare syntaxes. If HeroQueero is running this site, I would appreciate it, if you’d let’s it be known that I’m neither Jonathan or Stanley.

  • David

    The article makes it sound like everyone at the Black Party is tweaked out and getting fucked on the dance floor. Most people are dancing, talking, catching up, and meeting new friends. There’s sex if you want it – and some of the things you see are crazy (half the fun is looking at the outfits) but no one is putting a gun to your head. Relax and have a good time. I do every time I go.

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