“I knew I was gay very early on, although it wasn’t called gay back then. I knew that I wasn’t into girls in the way that I should be. I dated girls, and we sat in the back row of the cinema, and I did all that I was supposed to do, but I wasn’t enjoying it. I confessed to my mother while I was at university and she very typically and sweetly said: ‘All boys go through this stage.’ I was a loner for years, but I’ve been with my partner [Richard Clifford] for 43 years, which is quite an achievement. It remains a stable and loving relationship. It was another piece of luck in my life.”—Vicious & I, Claudius star Derek Jacobi, writing about how his sexuality affected his life and career. In a new wide-spanning essay penned for The Telegraph, the 82-year-old actor reflects on his life, the COVID-19 pandemic, his long friendship with Vicious co-star Ian McKellen and why he’ll never quit acting.
dhmonarch89
Well- the gay phase is a British prep school and University thing 😉 LOVE Derek!!!! One of the greatest actors EVER!
Donston
His mother’s reaction was ignorant and dismissive, but at least it wasn’t angry or heartbroken. That’s especially saying something for that time. Even if a homosexual experiences fluidity or contradictions, that doesn’t mean that they’ll ever be legit hetero and “straight”. And it definitely doesn’t mean that they’ll ever want a legit hetero commitment or have overall hetero preferences. Of course, a lot of people didn’t understand fluidity, the orientation spectrum or the individuality of sexuality back then. Hell, many don’t get it now.
It’s always uplifting to see “queer” (seemingly non-dysfunctional) commitments lasting for decades. It is possible.
Monkey1
There is straight, gay, bi. “Fluid” is a nonsense word for bisexual.
boblrice
@Monkey1 Does someone pay you to monitor this site and try to find contrary things to say? FYI, this one is you reaching pretty hard, so they should definitely not pay you your regular rate.
Donston
“Fluidity” isn’t an identity. It’s an experience, experiencing shifts or inconsistency in the rates or types of attraction, arousal, desire, passion, affection, enjoyment, fetish and/or what you are or aren’t willing to indulge. Or some shifts or inconsistency in where you are in the gender, romantic, sexual, affection, emotional investment, relationship commitment spectrum. It’s real and many people all over the spectrum, who embrace whatever identities or lifestyles experience it in different ways. While some don’t experience it in their life in any ways at all.
The point of that post was to say that no parent has a right to tell their child what they are or what their life’s journey will be. But of course, those points get lost because someone stays caught up in identity politics or stays being defensive about stuff they don’t have to be defensive about or decides to be unnecessarily bitchy.
Liquid Silver
Don’t worry, Derek. Probably when you’re 100.
Openminded
That’s funny
AxelDC
Emperor Clau-Clau
Essie
I watch I, Claudius about once a month because it is wonderful and I can’t get enough. Every actor in every part is perfection. And I love Derek Jacobi in just about everything he does. He never talked much about his private life so I didn’t know about his partner. So glad he has been in a happy partnership for so many years.
dhmonarch89
to those who haven’t seen I, Claudius… (read as Livia) ‘You’re all scum and you know it!’
twomen4u
Derek & Richard, thank you for demonstrating that two men can love each other and create a place of happiness. I have a set of friends who have been together 41 years and that makes my relationship to my now husband of 19 years pale in comparison.
Mehki
So?
My mom said my toddler brother would soon stop sucking his thumb.
Sixty years later…
I guess moms don’t know everything.