Since January, Gordon Lake and his husband, Manuel Santos Valero, have been afraid to leave their apartment in Bangkok out of fear their daughter, Carmen, will be stolen from them.
“I don’t take her to any meetings with me any more,” Lake tells the Bangkok Post, “and every time I have to go to a meeting myself, I take the long way home just to make sure I’m not being followed. We’re really worried.”
Carmen was born via surrogate six month ago. Lake says he had a good relationship with the birth mother leading up to the birth. He visited her regularly and even brought her flowers in the hospital. The day she signed the release allowing him to take Carmen home, he believed everything was fine.’
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Then 10 days later, he and Valero received a text message saying the birth mother, who has absolutely no biological ties to the child, no longer “agreed” and was refusing to sign over custody.
“She made it clear that she thought she was doing this for an ‘ordinary couple,’ and she said she was fine with doing it for an ‘ordinary couple.’ And we weren’t an ordinary couple,” Lake says.
She also argued that she believed that the baby was actually hers.
“But it was a frozen [egg] transfer, so it’s absolutely impossible,” Lake says.
Since the law automatically grants custody to the birth mother, Lake and Valero say they are constantly worried about receiving a knock on their door demanding their daughter be handed over. In fact, they’ve already had one very close call.
“On one occasion, she [the surrogate mother] came to the building where we had been living until a few days prior, and asked for Carmen to be brought down,” Lake says.
According to neighbors, she waited outside for eight hours before leaving with a group of other people who had been hiding nearby.
So far, the birth mother is keeping her identity secret, but she’s told local media that she’s determined to win this fight.
“The bond I have with my baby can’t be traded for money and I am not going to sell my daughter,” she said.
She has already been paid U.S. $9,250. A final payment of $5,100 is owed once she signs the documents at the U.S. embassy relinquishing parental rights, which may or may not happen. But Lake and Valero say they are trying to keep a positive attitude about it all.
“It’s one foot in front of the other,” Lake says, “but we have to think of the endgame, of our family back home together.”
Related: See The Amazing Photos Of Two Dads Holding Their Newborn For The Very First Time
h/t: Bangkok Post
James Lee Hawn
Surrogate gave up rights, she needs to be locked up for the threat,
Tobi
I hope they’re incredibly wealthy, especially as they’ve gone public. Surrogacy is illegal in Thailand. There’s also a massive undercurrent of xenophobia, and the police and legal system rarely find in favour of foreigners, unless the bribes are substantial enough to convince them to look the other way. Madness.
Stormie Montgomery
Throw her in jail. She was fine to “sell her baby” and give it over to a straight couple. But god forbid it wind up in the hands of two loving fathers. Screw this surrogate, any goodwill she had by becoming one is gone the moment it’s revealed what a bigot she is.
Will Moor
Why do they even live in a place like Bangkok as a gay couple, let alone try to start a family there? Well, I wish them luck!
M J Martinez Crogan
I have a gun, try to take what belongs to me, all bets off when you trespass
Billy Budd
Bitch.
CaliKyle
Some brilliant mind needs to perfect a gestational pod. Not only would such a thing be a boon to gay men but to countless heterosexual women who are unable to carry a baby to term. I’m sure the great majority of them are wonderful, selfless women, but surrogacy is like a hot minefield, one misstep and the whole thing can easily blow up in your face.
Joey Boyd
That’s when I would have to break down and get a gun in the house. Bitch would have to die. Period.
BobandBev Craig
Absolutely disgusting that this pair of should be allowed anywhere near Children they are the one’s that be thrown in jail
dwbyers1960
They have no business raising a child! Child molesters…..
dwbyers1960
They will find you!
BlueDude
@BobandBev Craig: @dwbyers1960: And who the fu©k are you people??? Stay on FB, or wherever you came from!
stranded
Maybe go through the long tedious process of adopting? Sorry, i feel bad for these guys but i disagree with outsourcing surrogates, which typically take advantage of a financially poor woman’s desperate need for cash, so she sells he womb so she doesn’t have to sell her vagina.
jwtraveler
When you go to a foreign country, you have to obey that country’s laws. There are laws that protect surrogate mothers in this country. I sympathize with their feelings that their daughter is being stolen from them, but I don’t approve of poor women in developing countries being used as wombs-for-hire by wealthy gay men from industrialized countries. There are ways to have a family without exploiting poor women.
jwtraveler
@BobandBev Craig: @dwbyers1960: Go away!
Prinny
@BobandBev Craig: @dwbyers1960: Get better at trolling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dakotahgeo
She has no custody rights. Neither does a pot who was used for the fondue! Suck on THAT, Slut!
dwbyers1960
@Prinny: Gay men should NOT RAISE children period. End of discussion.
Dakotahgeo
@dwbyers1960: I could ALMOST agree with you IF your parents and those like them, agree to be neutered and spayed before they have egg and sperm misfires like you! Yeah… I could handle that!! End of your stupid discussion!