How Apple Is Becoming Every Gay I Ever Hated, Ever

After purging the App Store of any software displaying PG-13 skin, Apple appears to have thrown down against apps like Grindr, requiring even stricter enforcement of its no-porn policy. Fine. But with its latest bout of censorship — nixing the NewsToons app from Mark Fiore, who this week became the first Internet-only political cartoonist to win a freakin’ Pulitzer, because it “ridicules public figures” — ya know who Apple is becoming? That obnoxious fab-u-lous A-gay who was an absolute nobody in high school, but who you still hung out with, and then he went to college, got a nose job and dental surgery, scored big as a day trader, and now parades around town in a Lamborghini, even when he’s just going out to get milk. That’s you, Apple, and you’re being a brat.