A married father of six in his early 30s says he’s “1,000,000%” straight… most of the time… except when he’s drunk. That’s when he turns into something else. But what? He’s not quite sure. So he’s writing to sex expert Yana Tallon-Hicks in hopes of finding some clarity.
“My wife and I only drink when my mother-in-law is watching the kids for the night,” the 30-year-old writes. “However there’s something we noticed when we’re drunk.”
The man goes on to say that he “absolutely [loves] everything about sex,” as evidenced by the fact that he’s 30 years old with six children.
“When I’m not drunk I’m 1,000,000% attracted to women only,” he explains. “I’m not attracted at all to men. I don’t like the way we smell, look, talk, our masculinity, facial hair, nothing.”
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But get a little booze in his system and that of all changes.
“When I’m drunk I’m down for anything!” the man admits. “Once I’m at that level I literally want vagina, penis, and [all other variations of sexual anatomy.] All of it turns me on super bad and my wife knows this and she thinks it’s sexy.”
Now he wonders: “Am I bisexual? I truly only think those things are sexy when I’m drunk and when I’m sober, it all actually turns me off.”
In her response, Tallon-Hicks cautions the man not to overthink it.
“Gender and sexuality and even sexual anatomy all exist on a spectrum,” she explains. “Meaning, the worries created when we’re taught to think in binary terms like male or female, vagina or penis, gay or straight, are often mitigated by the freedom that can be felt when we just give ourselves permission to be who we are, how we are.”
Her advice? Go with it! Especially since his wife seems to be on board with the whole thing.
“I wonder if part of the reason your sexual desires shift when you’ve been drinking is because alcohol might be granting your brain the permission to venture outside of that worrisome, binary box,” she pontificates.
“I invite you to experiment with giving yourself permission without the drinking to let your desires exist as they are and/or resist the urge to slap a label on yourself if you’re just not sure it fits yet. You’re open with your wife about these desires, she’s into it, you’re not hurting anyone — if it’s not broken, do you have to fix it?”
The bottom line, she says, is that he’s in control of his own identity.
“You get to name your identity however you’d like to. You can still identify as straight and have or even act on these desires. You can identify as bisexual if you’d like to — I don’t get to decide that for you. Know that if/when you do decide to re-label your sexuality, a community exists to welcome you whether that’s online or IRL.”
Related: Straight man receives oral sex from another guy, enjoys it, wonders if he’s now gay
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sanfranca1
Recipe for disaster.
sfhairy
Better sue the alcohol companies for making you gay!
mountainmaat
Sounds like my kinda man. Love it.
Dymension
Bottom line. Tee hee!
garyrj
Every guy eventually will swallow the worm at the bottom of of a Tequila bottle.
Chrisk
Yeah, sounds like a fun evening with a shitfaced drunk. Umm…no thanks.
PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
That’s how I do some of my best work :-p
Max
he’s quite the whore when inebriated.
djmcgamester
He probably shouldn’t worry about it too much EXCEPT if it’s leading to infidelity. He’s more than likely running along the spectrum of sexuality but it only comes out when drunk. As a father of six I’d be wary of any kind of physical experimentation. If he watches porn that’s a better outlet.
Yes, I’m weird, apparently, because I’m all about monogamy. Sue me.
masterwill7
I agree with you on this one.. He has 6 children, if he is going to get physical with men we all know where this will lead!! Better watch porn and stay with his wife/children.
CityguyUSA
Some say the only time you’re your true self is when you’re drunk.
MISTERJETT
alcohol just brings out what’s in the heart.
Doug
Somehow I have the feeling there’s some information left out here.
blackhook
Six kids by your “early 30s? Put a lid on it, buddy!
darkanser
Six kids by 30!!!???!!! And I thought my dad had been busy. When he had me, he was 33 and already had 3 kids. I was his fourth. Two more followed!!
inbama
“Do one thing but identify as another.”
It’s time we all stopped criticizing Rachel Dolezal.
ass eater
Six children! looks like someone is overcompensating.
msteve
Maybe that’s why Trump doesn’t drink alcohol. He might tell the truth or figure out why he has to change wives often.
scotty
never seen a ring hold up a zipper.