Hellish Rhetoric

MN Archbishop Says Marriage Equality Is A Plot By Satan

John Nienstedt, the Archbishop of Minneapolis-St. Paul, is none too happy that he was on the losing side of marriage equality in his state. But in a speech to Catholic leaders at a conference in California, Nienstedt has upped the rhetoric, saying that marriage equality (and a lot of other things) are all a plot by Satan.

“Sodomy, abortion, contraception, pornography, the redefinition of marriage and the denial of objective truth are just some of the forces threatening the stability of our civilization,” Nienstedt thundered. ‘The source of these machinations is none other than the Father of Lies. Satan knows all too well the value that the family contributes to the fabric of a good, solid society, as well as the future of God’s work on Earth,”

Now you know where Nienstedt is coming from when he cites Maggie Gallagher as an authority in his speech. And Nienstedt has long been a hard-liner on gay issues. After all, this is the man who once told a parishioner she would go to hell if she didn’t reject her gay son. (He’s a little short on pastoral skills.)

Still, when Nienstedt looks out in the pews, he must see Satan staring back at him. Catholics are more likely to support marriage equality than non-Catholic voters.

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  • Dakotahgeo

    Besides liking like he fell out of an ugly tree and hit every branch before hitting the ground, this thing has NO pastoral skills whatsoever! I so wish these theologically-inept people would leave the discipleship and counseling to those who are qualified for such work! This is a man who is a total Catholic… unfortunately, he doesn’t come close to being a loving Christian!

  • Polaro

    Oh, no, that butt-ugly, green dress you are wearing is Satan’s plot. Girlfriend…have you no shame?

  • 1EqualityUSA

    Did the children cry when you Catholic pedophiles raped them? Were your clergy kind enough to use lubricant, or did they tear these children, making them bleed, then threaten them with Hell if they spoke of this heinous act? The Catholic Church has lost the ability to point fingers at anyone. The Catholic Church has lost credibility. Go snuggle up next to a politician and force your Doctrine in political spheres, because, Spiritually speaking, your well has run dry.

  • Deepdow

    What a typical self-hating closet case runner and hider. We know the story : mid/late twentieth century youth grows up in a world of gay hate / runs into the priesthood for some semblance of acceptance and to escape his NATURAL feelings…years later – pissed that the world is changing, calls other openly gay people JUST WANTING TO LIVE – plots from satan.

    What a dickbomb if there ever was one. Why are people like this able to even have platforms from which to speak?
    The stability of Civilization NEVER came from discrimination or hate.

    Learn2History you pug nosed self hating piece of shit ‘holy’ asshole.

  • Hillers

    Archbishop Fussybritches looks like the kind of closeted queen who’d pick up a trick in a back alley, dress him up as the Dutchboy, and get off on him scrubbing his kitchen like that funky old dude in “My Own Private Idaho.” Tell me you don’t see it.

  • andy_d

    Need to address this idiot in words that he will understand: WE WON. YOU LOST. GET OVER IT. (may I add NEENER NEENER NEENER?)

  • 2eo

    But you know what isn’t an evil plot. The r@pe of hundreds of children by John Nienstedt.

    It’s a sickening episode, and yet another nail in the coffin of christianity as the evidence mounts of the direct correlation between faith and paedophilia. It’s now 100 million cases that show it versus 0 against.

    There’s still time for a comeback though.

  • Ogre Magi

    Yes, I have brunch with Satan,Jareth,Nyarlathotep, and Loki every Sunday.

  • jckfmsincty

    The Catholic Church seems determined to become completely irrelevant.

  • MikeE

    you do realize that if he wasn’t wearing that bright green stain dress and that little hat and living in a big old’ church, he’d be put away in the loony bin for talking about “satan” as though it were a real person.

    incredible how some delusional people are put in insane asylums, while others get pay-cheques from the Vatican.

  • jonjct

    ^ look at these haters. omg, haters of the catholic church are haters all the same. i am ashamed to be gay b/c gays are apparently haters of the ugliest kind.

  • Dakotahgeo

    @jonjct: Unfortunately, what you say is true. I am in shock from the comments I’ve been reading regarding the Miss America contest and the wonderful winner, a Indian-American young lady… who, by the way, is striving to become a Medical Doctor. I have also spouted much disgust with and against the Catholic church and I know that is wrong. We are called to a higher road than to act like our enemies. I lament that we have such vehement GLBT community members and would hope that they resist sounding like little demons when addressing the social problems we face today. It is indeed time to ‘grow up’ and educate ourselves in a positive light! It is not easy, but it right!

  • Deepdow


    Link an article here describing a situation where gay people have bullied, murdered or tortured someone for being heterosexual.
    I also want you to list any gay rights group that advocates discrimination and whose leadership calls heterosexual people – all of them – plots by satan.

    There are consequences for being an asshole in this world. This priest is an asshole. He is free to say those things, but he is not free from criticism.


  • Deepdow

    My reply was meant for


  • Dakotahgeo

    @Deepdow: You sound like a contented, happy person to be with. A true healer of hurting hearts. No thanks.

  • Dakotahgeo

    @Deepdow: My apologies. That happens to me sometimes also. We have so many malcontents on these blogs (even though they constitute a small, small minority) that they sometimes provoke kneejerk reactions in most sensible-thinking persons. Mea culpa.

  • jonjct

    thank you deepdow, ^ haters just wanna hate, right?

  • Lcocci

    We hope Roman Catholics that think they have been chased out due to gender ID, sexuality or conscious will begin to learn about us and the more then 300 independent catholic churches that are not Roman. We welcome everyone. We need your support . We all abor the human rights crimes of that church and we pray you will join us and allow ourselves less time criticising what we don’t believe in and more time on what we do.

  • Deepdow


    Just wow. Did my comment reflect upon the whole catholic church, or just one person within it? By the way, gay people have every right to criticize organized religion which works in opposition to their liberty and promotes stigma and bigotry. I can’t believe how you conflate things..

    Also thanks for proving nothing asshat.

  • Dakotahgeo

    @Lcocci: Thannnnnnk you!!! I love positive responses to the problem(s) at hand, and not the constant bickering. Breath of fresh air, you are!

  • Trip

    This guy should live in Russia. You know, the place where Stoli is made. The country that advocates gay bashing. But let’s ignore that and just keep on promoting Stoli!

  • Eiswirth

    This fucking Nazi is my archbishop. His hatred of gays, gay marriage and contraception are well known and the reason I am no longer a practicing Catholic; I can’t disagree more with his bigotry and vitriol. He’s so steeped in the past and blind traditionalism, while ignoring the real reasons behind fewer marriages and child bearing, that all reason has been abandoned. Nary a word out of his mouth about the scandals of the child abusers who are still serving as priests. Just a horrible, horrible human being.

  • Lcocci

    @ Eiswirth ,look into the non Roman like old Catholics and the liberal catholic church as we are. We are the opposite of rcc and proud of our LGBT clergy. Please don’t let bigots win by not practicing.
    Peace and blessings.

  • damon459

    The man is clearly one of those knuckle dragging neanderthal I keep hearing so much about. Frankly I’m happy the church kicked me out all those years ago, their fairytales made little sense even to a child. I have an easier time believing the Harry Potter books were real.

  • Dakotahgeo

    @Lcocci: Again, thank you, Lcocci. There are many Christian denominations out there today that are GLBTQI-friendly and theologically sound. Remember, just because they say they are Christian doesn’t make it so. Don’t listen to people– observe the way they LIVE their Christian life. You’ll be able to discern individuals on HOW they live the Word they’re preachin’!

  • Lcocci

    TY Dali, its true, I’ve been in street and pastoral ministry since 1985 , I remember when nurses would not touch HIV patients let alone “Christians” openly gay clergy like myself had no church acceptance so we were on the street too. It was good training to understand Christ was in the street with the church and was a Scandelous out cast as well.

    Blessings, bishop Dave

  • 2eo

    @Deepdow: Dako has a history of defending paedophiles and the church. He is one and is currently trying to get another one a visa from Brazil.

  • Ogre Magi


  • Lcocci

    @magi , that one has always been beyond me as well. It is why I have never been roman

Comments are closed.