barely a mouthful

The Donald Trump Footlong Is Actually Just A Three-Inch Wiener


“It’s just for fun,” said Yolanda Smile, a supervisor at famous hot dog stand The Wiener’s Circle. “Absolutely not any kind of political statement.”

On Thursday, owners of the eatery announced that, in order to “welcome” Donald Trump to Chicago over the weekend, they’ll be selling “Trump Footlongs,” which are 3-inch long hot dogs.

It’s just for fun, however. And absolutely not intended as any kind of political statement.

All day Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, the stand will sell the microdogs in three bundles — each of which are being sold just for fun, and are not intended as any kind of political statement.

Customers can enjoy a “Trump footlong,” (which is one non-political dog) a “Trump package” (two tasty dogs, both just for fun), or a “Trump Super PAC” (four scrumptious dogs, served with fries and a drink; none of which are a dig at Trump).

On Friday, Trump will hold a campaign rally at Chicago’s UIC Pavilion, an event that will like draw a massive amount of protesters.

“We saw he’s coming to UIC, and we figured that since [Marco] Rubio said that about him, why not run a special while he’s here?” Smile said.

Protesters can re-energize by stuffing their faces with the franks, which we should mention are just for fun and are not intended to be any kind of political statement.

However, by selling the snacks, the owners might be subtly telegraphing their suspicions that Donald Trump has a very small penis.


H/t: LGBTQ Nation