Queerty is better as a member

Log in | Register
  WELSH BET

Action Star Luke Evans Doesn’t Realize His Gay Past Is All Over The Internets

Queerty reader Joseph Jones directed us to the interesting case of rising star Luke Evans, who hails from Wales (tee-hee) and has been garnering attention with roles in The Three Musketeers, Immortals, The Raven and Peter Jackson’s highly anticipated adaptation of  The Hobbit.

Evans came out early in his career and did several candid interviews with the gay press, discussing his decision to be out, how he thought it would impact his career and even his taste in gay porn. So why is he being portrayed as straight in the British press these days? Don’t his handlers know the  truth is just a few mouse clicks away?

Back in 2002, Evans starred in the Boy George musical Taboo in London’s West End and gave an interview to The Advocate, where he was quite open about being gay.

I knew that even though my part was a straight character, everybody knew me as a gay man and, in my life in London, I never tried to hide it. I knew I was going to have to do interviews with gay magazines, so I thought, ‘Well, I’m going to have to be open’. It’s who I am. And if people don’t like it, then I don’t want their jobs. I’ve never been a very good liar.

Two years later, in 2004, Evans chatted with GaydarNation about his role as a gay porn star in the play Hardcore. Here’s a telling snippet:

So, have you spent a long time researching gay porn?

Years and years. I bought my first film when I was 15 and now I have a good collection and I add to it regularly. I research it almost every night!!

What makes a good porn star?
An enormous big fat cock!

So far so good! Evans appeared in several West End musicals, including Miss Saigon, Avenue Q and Rent before signing with new management in 2009 and redirecting his career toward movie roles. He made his film debut as Apollo in Clash of the Titans, played a small part in Robin Hood, and appeared in the 2010 British rom-com Tamara Drewe. That’s when things got weird.

The September 12, 2010, edition of the Daily Mail reported:

Handsome Welsh actor Luke Evans, 31, who stars with Gemma Arterton in  Tamara Drewe, is dating fashion industry PR Holly Goodchild, 27—even though she describes herself as single on Facebook.

After being friends for some years, the pair are now an item, Holly said at the premiere of Luke’s film last week. ‘Luke’s lovely – we’re really old friends and it just sort of happened,’ she said. He added: ‘We are nowhere near engaged but things are really good.’

Sure there are bisexual actors, but to go from proclaiming yourself gay—and admitting you’ve been watching gay porn religiously for 15 years—to being linked to a PR flack (the beardiest job in the world, FYI) is a real head-scratcher. And in his early candid interviews, Evans never says anything about dating women—it’s all gay, gay, gay.

In a more recent interview with British Cosmo Evans is slightly more evasive.

“Just the other week, I sang to a very close female friend. She almost cried. And I love to cook! I’ve impressed hundreds of women with my cooking. And they always come back for more.”

“Absolutely we can have female friends and not want to have sex with them. You dream about having sex with them, but you don’t actually have sex with them.”

“In 10 years, I’d love to live near the sea, in a warmer climate. I could see myself with three dogs…and it’d be great to share them with someone else.”

Ah yes, “someone.” The pronoun game lives on!

We’re not saying all actors have to be out. We’re not even saying you can’t explicitly pretend to be straight (though it’s kind of gross). But once you step out of the closet and into the light, you can’t go running back in when its convenient. This isn’t the 1950s—or even the ’80s—when homo hijinx could be hushed up with a few phone calls. In the Internet Age, to borrow from the Bard, the penis that men do lives after them.

By:           Dan Avery
On:           Aug 8, 2011
Tagged: , , , , , ,

  • 55 Comments
    • That Bitch Téa Delgado
      That Bitch Téa Delgado

      I don’t think that’s Luke in the top pic/front page pic.

      Aug 8, 2011 at 3:08 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • LMars
      LMars

      AfterElton quoted his management in an outrageously homophobic remark about how it’s immature for gay actors to disclose at all that they’re gay. And on Wikipedia, they’re trying to bury the story under the illusion of having policy on their side http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Biographies_of_living_persons/Noticeboard#comments_as_regards_the_notability_.2Fprivacy_issues_of_the_subjects_sexual_preferences (which they don’t)

      Aug 8, 2011 at 3:12 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • That Bitch Téa Delgado
      That Bitch Téa Delgado

      Yep, here’s the offensive statement by his publicist:

      “I do not comment on my client’s personal lives in the media. As for Luke, he did so once, a long time ago when he was an inexperienced, young actor and now with maturity and hindsight, he has learned not to engage the press in his personal life again.”

      So deceiving people is “mature” thing to do. (For what it’s worth, Luke might not have known what the publicist would say, so I wouldn’t necessarily blame him for that.)

      Aug 8, 2011 at 3:16 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Annony Nonny
      Annony Nonny

      That’s not Luke in the top pic..he doesn’t have light brown hair.
      This is Luke

      http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&cp=6&gs_id=m&xhr=t&q=luke+evans&gs_sm=&gs_upl=&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.&biw=1024&bih=653&um=1&ie=UTF-8&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi

      Aug 8, 2011 at 3:19 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • that'snotluke
      that'snotluke

      That’s a pic of Nick Stahl

      Aug 8, 2011 at 3:31 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Blech!
      Blech!

      Really makes me not like this guy. I’m all for people shutting up about their sexuality in favor of focusing on their work, but this blatant lying is really disgusting. It doesn’t smack of bisexuality, either. This is flat out lying to save career. I now have no desire to see the person on film–or on the street.

      Aug 8, 2011 at 3:32 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Eddy
      Eddy

      You have Hans Matheson in the picture you’re posting of a “gay” man who’s trying to go back into the closet. You might want to get the right pic when you’re saying such things.

      Aug 8, 2011 at 3:38 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Tony
      Tony

      Most of the time I could care less if an actor who is gay admits it. But, once you’ve thrown open the closet door you can’t re-close it.

      It more than just a bit insulting. Refusing to talk about it will just make people google: “Luke Evans gay” which will then pop up every time someone type his name into google.

      They’re just making this a bigger deal than it would have ever been.

      Aug 8, 2011 at 3:58 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • ROB
      ROB

      It’s ‘hails’ from Wales, btw…

      I feel a bit sorry for the guy – this is obviously a sweat-soaked panic-fest by his management, I doubt he’s so bothered by it all… And I think he’ll always be the action co-star, never the lead (a bit like fellow Welshman Ioan Gruffudd), so could probably get away with being both a Brit and an out gay.

      Aug 8, 2011 at 4:07 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • MattCA181
      MattCA181

      It’s odd how irritating I find this. If he is willingly going back in the closet after being so upfront, I really do hope he has a short and embarrassing career. I honestly wish him nothing but failure for him (that is incredibly cruel to think). It’s one thing to make a choice from the beginning of a career to be closeted (there are many reasons to do so), but to go back in is so gross for many, many reasons.

      It reeks of greed, cowardice, shame, and bad advice. It also sends a horrible message to not only gay people struggling, but also straight audiences as well. I don’t know why this bothers me so much. It does though. It may just be a rumor; however, if it isn’t, what a lame-o. Do not want.

      Aug 8, 2011 at 4:14 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • George412
      George412

      Sad.

      Aug 8, 2011 at 4:18 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • M
      M

      @Blech!: But here’s the thing–he doesn’t need to do this to save his career. It’s entirely unnecessary.

      Aug 8, 2011 at 5:07 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Chadboy
      Chadboy

      He is the Nathan Lane for this decade. I believe Nathan came out, went back in and came out again in the 90s if memory serves me correctly.

      Aug 8, 2011 at 7:24 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jack E. Jett
      Jack E. Jett

      Luke needs a spanking and should call me direct regarding such.

      Aug 8, 2011 at 8:01 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • adam
      adam

      @Chadboy: I don’t remember reading interviews with Nathan in the 90s, but when it hit the papers he is gay Nathan said something like “what? when was I ever in the closet?” and I remember him mentioning that he’d had advisers counsel him after a hit to move a bit into the closet and he said he’d rejected that advice.

      Aug 8, 2011 at 8:07 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • B
      B

      No. 3 · That Bitch Téa Delgado wrote, ‘Yep, here’s the offensive statement by his publicist: “I do not comment on my client’s personal lives in the media. As for Luke, he did so once, a long time ago when he was an inexperienced, young actor and now with maturity and hindsight, he has learned not to engage the press in his personal life again.” So deceiving people is “mature” thing to do.’

      As a point of order, you are not deceiving people if you don’t talk about your personal life when being interviewed about your job. From a pragmatic standpoint, his publicist may have a valid point – if they want to say something about you and the only information you give them is about our career, then (being lazy) they are going to write an article about your career, which would hopefully boost your career more than a fluff piece about whoever wanted to be your boyfriend.

      I wouldn’t consider the publicist’s attitude offensive if he gives the same advice to straight actors as well.

      Aug 8, 2011 at 8:19 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Finwicj
      Finwicj

      OMG, he totally didn’t pinge my gaydar when I was watching TAMARA DREWE. Makes me want to certify him a phenomenal actor. I wish him the best.

      Aug 8, 2011 at 10:25 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • catinhat
      catinhat

      No, this is not the 1950s, it is the new millenium. People have the right to choose who the hell they want to be with- men, women or both. Gay people need to grow up as well, and stop trying to live their lives through celebrities.

      Aug 8, 2011 at 10:39 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • That Bitch Téa Delgado
      That Bitch Téa Delgado

      @B In the past year and a half, Luke Evans has done several interviews where he has discussed: growing up in Wales; being the only child of Johovah’s Witnesses; being bullied at school; loving Rick Astley, Kylie Minogue and Belinda Carlisle as an adolescent; what part of London he lives in; taking camping trips with his friends.

      Yet, somehow, according to his publicist, talking about such things lacks “maturity.”

      It’s a double standard: Jennifer Lopez can pour her heart out to Us magazine about her divorce from Marc Anthony; Denise Richards can tell People magazine all about her marriage to Charlie Sheen; but Luke Evans won’t talk about his personal life. Why? Because he’s gay.

      Strangely enough, Luke’s Hobbit co-stars Ian McKellan and Stephen Fry also seem to lack “maturity” because they’re openly gay.

      Aug 8, 2011 at 11:00 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Erik
      Erik

      This is the definition of pathetic.

      Aug 9, 2011 at 12:02 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Interesting
      Interesting

      He was having a career as an out man, and now, that its taken off even more he’s going in the closet? Totally shows how fucked up Hollywood is.

      Aug 9, 2011 at 1:04 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Interesting
      Interesting

      @Erik: I agree that its pathetic. But the definition of pathetic is = catinhat.

      How fucked up do you have to be to post a comment like that in a story where its clear the guy was out, but is now going back in the closet for his career. Only someone with severe emotional issues feels need to defend someone else’s closet.

      Aug 9, 2011 at 1:07 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • B
      B

      No. 19 · That Bitch Téa Delgado wrote, “@B In the past year and a half, Luke Evans has done several interviews where he has discussed: growing up in Wales; being the only child of Johovah’s Witnesses; being bullied at school; loving Rick Astley, Kylie Minogue and Belinda Carlisle as an adolescent; what part of London he lives in; taking camping trips with his friends.”

      So what? How do you know that his publicist didn’t tell him to not go into any of that either? What you are missing is that the publicist is supposed to help promote the guy and sometimes that means staying “on message”. If they can make a big deal about his role in The Hobbit and if the film is very successful, that could really help his career, so it makes sense to spend all the time with the press in making sure he and the film get mentioned in the same sentence, and you don’t want that buried in the noise. Fewer people will be interested in hiring him for a film if all the PR is about how much fun it is to go with him on a camping trip.

      Aug 9, 2011 at 2:31 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Ganondorf
      Ganondorf

      This is an outrage that demands swift justice! No one who truly cares about lgbt rights should rest until several sex videos of him getting railed by sizemeat are released and viewed by everyone on the internet. All is for naught if this outcome isn’t realized. REPARATIONS!

      Aug 9, 2011 at 3:53 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • That Bitch Téa Delgado
      That Bitch Téa Delgado

      To use a time-honored cinema cliché: You just don’t get it, do you?

      The ONLY TIME publicists use the “do not talk about personal lives” statement is when it deals with a gay celebrity. One of the key roles of publicity and public relations for a star is getting across the message that the star is somehow “relatable,” so getting bullied at school, loving Kylie and Belinda, going camping with friends, that’s relatable, and personal.

      The publicist’s fear is that an audience knowing that such-and-such actor prefers to date members of his own sex will turn people off from going to see his movie. One would think that the recent success of The Smurfs proved this wrong — here you have ENTIRE families going to see a movie that’s top-lined by an openly gay actor. And NPH is liked because he’s so casual about it, and people respected him for correcting the lie that his own publicist had put out.

      Continuing with the charade, continuing with the lies, that would be bad press, far worse, in my opinion, than being open and honest; at this stage, the story is out there, so if Luke and his team were to continue with former approach, people could begin to distrust and dilike him; but if he takes the latter approach, people will admire him for his honesty and bravery and embrace him.

      Aug 9, 2011 at 4:04 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • HadrianusAelius
      HadrianusAelius

      Do I sense Queerty exhibiting the predatory characteristics of Perez Hilton to out actors? That is BULLYING as well, you know? Leave the man alone. He will come out on his time or not.

      Aug 9, 2011 at 7:09 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • HadrianusAelius
      HadrianusAelius

      The top picture IS him

      http://lostfilm.info/images/photo_actor/58/1217522_574018.jpg

      He does cut a dashing leading man figure, dos he not?

      Aug 9, 2011 at 7:34 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Oh Dear (John From England)
      Oh Dear (John From England)

      Publicists put the fear of god into their clients and he obviously has bad ones. Not all actors are savvy enough to find a publicist who actually has their interest at heart.

      Aug 9, 2011 at 7:45 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • J
      J

      Are you people daft? He isnt dating that woman, or any woman for that matter. Do any of you know how PR works? This is all being done to create a buzz around him. It’s done all the time.

      Aug 9, 2011 at 9:24 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Interesting
      Interesting

      @Oh Dear (John From England): That is true, but he still should have a mind of his own. To some degree this is his choice, not theirs. As you cans see here by some of the rather self hating comments supporting him at all cost, there is some element of the gay world that will always justify another gay person treating gay as bad, no matter what, and that’s likely an internal struggle for him right now. As was pointed out, it is not even true anymore. The fact is that a movie with a gay actor opened large at the box office is an amazing feet like the Smurfs did, but will anyone admit that’s what happened? Probably not. Because this is about bigotry not reality, both internal and external.

      Aug 9, 2011 at 11:57 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • M
      M

      @HadrianusAelius: What the hell are you talking about?

      @Oh Dear (John From England): True and it’s very effective.

      @J: I agree, but this is a really bad way to create buzz about someone. God forbid Immortals tanks this FALL. He’ll be over before he even starts here.

      Aug 9, 2011 at 1:15 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • B
      B

      No. 25 · That Bitch Téa Delgado wrote, “To use a time-honored cinema cliché: You just don’t get it, do you?”

      Actually it is you who doesn’t get it – my assumption is that the main thing that matters to a publicist is the bottom line. Read the newspapers lately? Even sfgate.com (the SF Chronicle’s web page) has a link to the Gawker article about this actor being gay, presumably because it is an “attention getter”, and getting attention distracted from the message the publicist wants to project is not going to help the actor’s career.

      As to your “camping trip” example, suppose you had a straight actor who like to go on camping trips, but also liked to go to the symphony with his girlfriend. Would it be surprising if his publicist told him to talk about the camping trip but not the symphony so the press reports would be about something that complemented his roles in some “action” films?

      Aug 9, 2011 at 5:30 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Strepsi
      Strepsi

      @B:


      @ B: but the problem is, publicists NEVER tell their stars not to be personal if the star is straight. We know and speculate on who any straight celebrity is dating and Letterman or Leno will ask known straight celebrities about their childhoods, dating life, marriage, childbirth, kids’ doing well in school, etc. etc. (thus disclosing their orientation AND discussing their sexuality AND personal life” all at once!)

      And do you think the paparazzi just happen to see couples like Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens “canoodling” on Malibu Beach? No, publicists direct them there!

      The truly, genuinely private celebrity is incredibly rare: and given Luke’s interviews, he wasn’t one (many British actors are far more earthy and less given to spin generally than Americans as well).

      I tend to side with @Téa Delgado and think that the publicist denial of “never talks about his (or her) private life” is PR-speak reserved for gay celebrities.

      Aug 9, 2011 at 6:20 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • B
      B

      No. 33 · Strepsi wrote, “@ B: but the problem is, publicists NEVER tell their stars not to be personal if the star is straight. We know and speculate on who any straight celebrity is dating and Letterman or Leno will ask known straight celebrities about their childhoods, dating life, marriage, childbirth, kids’ doing well in school, etc. etc. (thus disclosing their orientation AND discussing their sexuality AND personal life” all at once!)”

      Letterman and Leno are not an actor’s publicists, and actors rarely get on to either Letterman’s or Leno’s program until the actors already interesting to a sufficiently large audience. Also, what an actor would say to Letterman or Leno on their program is different than what an actor would say to a reporter during an interview – on a TV program, being overly secretive would make the actor look weird; during an interview, a reporter would understand that the interview is about the actor’s career, not his life, and that the actor had a good reason for wanting to stay focused. Also, Letterman, Leno, the actor, and his publicist possibly go over ground rules about what the actor will be asked before the actor goes on the show.

      “And do you think the paparazzi just happen to see couples like Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens “canoodling” on Malibu Beach? No, publicists direct them there!”

      Really? Do you have proof of that? Hint: paparazzi don’t need to be directed there – they are stalkers.

      “I tend to side with @Téa Delgado and think that the publicist denial of “never talks about his (or her) private life” is PR-speak reserved for gay celebrities.”

      Unfortunately, neither of you have any evidence to back up that conjecture.

      Aug 9, 2011 at 9:22 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Interesting
      Interesting

      @B: This isn’t a court of law. Its a court of common sense. Sadly you are lacking it.

      Aug 9, 2011 at 10:21 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • B
      B

      No. 35 · Interesting wrote, “@B: This isn’t a court of law. Its a court of common sense. Sadly you are lacking it.”

      A clear case of projection: anyone who actually had some “common sense” would realize (as I do) that publicists, and Hollywood in general, have a one-track mind centered on the bottom line. They really don’t care if an actor is gay. They do care if the press would harp on it to the point that “messaging” about the movies the actor is in gets lost in the noise. Ironically various news outlets, including QUEERTY, are the ones making a big deal about it to the extent of swamping everything else. It is “swamping everything else” that is the problem: they don’t want an article about an actor starring in a movie about to be released to be all about his sexual orientation, with a final sentence saying, “BTW, he’s appearing in X.” They want the main focus of the article to be about “appearing in X” and they’ll want the actor to keep quiet about anything that detracts from that. It’s business and nothing else.

      Aug 11, 2011 at 12:03 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Rocket
      Rocket

      @B The fact is that they had him talk about dating a woman. That has nothing to do with his movie. So you are trying to make all these points and stick up for homophobic Hollywood, but you are wrong.

      If it was just about not talking about being gay that’s one thing. It’s not okay, people should be able to be open, but it’s not as bad as lying about being straight. Especially after you have been out of the closet.

      Aug 11, 2011 at 8:42 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • jonjon1968
      jonjon1968

      His publicist says he shouldn’t talk about his personal life. His coming out was “immaturity”. Then why the hell is he talking about dating women now? Isn’t that personal, too? He should say no comment. What makes this situation particularly offensive is that he himself said, “I knew I was going to have to do interviews with gay magazines, so I thought, ‘Well, I’m going to have to be open’. It’s who I am. And if people don’t like it, then I don’t want their jobs. I’ve never been a very good liar.” How do you rationalize pretending to date women (lying) after a statement like that? He should have fired any handlers that advised him to do it. He could just do like Matt Bomer and say nothing about his private life. Matt even talks about his kids, but nothing about his husband. Don’t give them any new quotes and all they will have is old news. Lying is just going to create scandal and ruin his credibility.

      Aug 12, 2011 at 7:16 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jimmy Fury
      Jimmy Fury

      I’m honestly a little disgusted by this…
      The sad thing, for me, is that I wanted to see The Immortals and the Three Musketeers. Shame.

      Aug 14, 2011 at 12:49 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Daniel
      Daniel

      I think Hollywood is a joke. The whole industry is full of talented gay men and women working at all levels in this industry. Without gay people there would be no Hollywood!

      I feel sorry for Luke really. It sounds like he’s been given the hard word by his publicist, agent etc. They’ve told him to do the whole “straight acting” thang if he wants a career. The guy is seriously talented, absolutely freaking hot so I’m still rooting for him (pun intended). I won’t stop watching movies with him in it cos’ I really think it’s the Hollywood agents and publicists that suck.

      Hope he comes to his senses before it ends in tears. There’s been a few tragedies in Hollywood because of this kind of behaviour.

      Oct 22, 2011 at 6:22 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Veronica
      Veronica

      “We’re not saying all actors have to be out. We’re not even saying you can’t explicitly pretend to be straight (though it’s kind of gross). ”

      —Incredible. You would be up in arms if someone had stated “it’s gross of to pretend to be gay”. Heck you would probably try and have the writer fired from his/her job.

      The hypocrisy of you people just makes me sick.

      Oct 24, 2011 at 1:18 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Mimi
      Mimi

      @Veronica. Thats the line in the article that got me too. But if you think this is nasty you should visit other gay sites e.g. datalounge. Gay men are something special for sure.

      Nov 6, 2011 at 6:19 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Sam
      Sam

      @Veronica: The writer was saying that pretending to be something you’re not is gross, not that being straight is gross. Try to keep up, dear.

      Nov 14, 2011 at 5:19 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • anna
      anna

      That’s not luke evans. I can’t find out who he is but that’s not luke evans.

      Mar 9, 2012 at 1:12 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • ken
      ken

      I think you all are hypocrites. Why does he HAVE to be Gay. You talk about freeness …but if he decides after 10 years he likes Pussy its his life. If he came out, thenets praise him. If he is different and changes his mind he’s wrong. Go kill yourselves

      Mar 10, 2012 at 10:09 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Alana
      Alana

      My sister has lived her entire life straight. The straightest woman I know! One day, at the age of 29 she meets a woman and something just sparks in her for this female. It was not sex as they didn’t have sex for some bit into their relationship (and something she said it actually took a bit of getting use to at first) and she doesn’t find herself attracted to any other women in that way during this time (or any time after or before). Things didn’t work out between her and the girl (mostly because no one taught the girl that domestic abuse is wrong). Any way, my sister is still straight and dates men again. I dated a gay man once. A friend of mine from age 10. He came out the summer before we started high school, but we all knew it years before and didn’t care. We were inseparable throughout high school, I even helped him pick out his graduation dress (Don’t ask! Heaven love Munchie!). We went to different colleges but near one another so we still hung out. One day, he tells me he’s always been attracted to me and has had a crush on me since I first moved in the neighborhood. He made it clear that he’s still gay and that though he can find women attractive, other me he’s never been attracted sexually to them. He spent the better half of a year trying to persuade me to date him. We dated for a year. He never claimed to be straight (and neither has Luke Evans I might add) while we dated, but made no bones about letting anyone know I was his girl. I even think he got a kick out of telling people he was gay then saying “I’d like you to meet my girlfriend!”… Heck, we often pointed cute guys out to each other. Ultimately I was the one who broke up with him. I was scared I guess; being so young & not really being sure where we might be going & mostly, I didn’t want to chance some bad break up & lose my best friend. He was hurt a bit but understood, as he had some the same worries. As years went by we started to see less and less of one another & were heading in different directions, but it was fun as heck while it lasted! The strange irony is that I myself am bisexual! Then there’s one of good friends brother. As long as I’ve known him, he’s been gay. Six years ago while in Japan for about three months, he meets a woman and they become fast, close friends. When he comes home they started corresponding over the net. As time goes on, she’d come & visit him or vise versa (great girl, really). Two years ago he makes up his mind to marry her. He’s madly in love and can’t live without her. He still feels he’s gay: “I was born gay! That can’t be changed. But this woman was made for me & is the love of my life.” As far as I can see they are blissfully happy & crazy about each other. No politics, no positioning to get ahead, just love! In the last year because of hatred, hypocrisy, & close mindedness; I’ve had to tell many people those 3 stories & no one ever believes that they’re true but they are. Love is crazy & the human emotions are complex. Who any of us to say what, when, or how it should go about conducting its business! It’s his business & up to him how to handle it. Fight your, your way. Let him fight his, his way and stop fighting one another. If you can’t do that, then that shows the hypocrisy & hatred in your heart not anyone else.

      Apr 14, 2012 at 1:47 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • balehead
      balehead

      He’s not gay….stopping trying to shame the straight allies….

      Mar 13, 2014 at 9:34 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • pscheck2
      pscheck2

      O.K. gay, str8, bi, trans,intersex, et al he is what he is and if he is trying to back in to his closet, he should do it gracefully and not give the illusion he was str8 all the time and made a mistake by declaring he was gay! Like Matt Bomer allude to nothing, and just do a good job at being a top rated actor. BTW, How many so-called str8 actors/actresses, have come out lately? Most of them vehemently denied they were gay when it was rumored they were gay and some of them had elaborate PR campaigns started to fend off the ‘gay’ tag!Also,they suddenly do the PDA thing with the opposite sex!

      Mar 13, 2014 at 6:43 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Alton
      Alton

      @HadrianusAelius: I think you’re missing the point. He was already out. I have as much respect as anyone (and more than some) for the right of people to decide when and if they want to come out. It IS a deeply personal decision. But going back in after you’ve publicly come out is a bit different. That sends a horrible message that you can’t be successful as an out gay man, which is patent nonsense. Matthew Boomer, Neil Patrick Harris, Jim Parsons, Ian McKellan, and many more prove that lie. If there is stigma attached to being a gay man in Hollywood, it’s not going to go away by people without the integrity to be out and proud.

      Jul 10, 2014 at 7:56 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • enlightenone
      enlightenone

      @MattCA181: “It’s one thing to make a choice from the beginning of a career to be closeted (there are many reasons to do so), but to go back in is so gross for many, many reasons. It reeks of greed, cowardice, shame, and bad advice.”

      Making a choice to be in the closet in the beginning of a career is also bad advice because it too reeks of devaluing of SELF (which ultimately is all we have)for a career, money, endorsements, a female fan base, as well as cowardly and SHAMEFUL. That’s the message gay youth get! All the rest is was adults pay attention to.

      Jul 19, 2014 at 8:48 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • enlightenone
      enlightenone

      @B: Stop typing! You’ve written your dissertation and no mature, gay man is buying.

      Jul 19, 2014 at 9:39 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • enlightenone
      enlightenone

      @jonjon1968: He should have hired you! It doesn’t require any special talent or degrees to be a PR person, not to say you don’t happen to have any special talent, education, or degrees. Go for it! Some of these potential younger actors could use you so they can maintain some integrity and have a career. It can be done. It’s not Rock Hudson’s Hollywood though there will always be homophobia wherever humans are.

      Jul 19, 2014 at 9:48 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • enlightenone
      enlightenone

      @ken: You first!

      Jul 19, 2014 at 9:51 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • enlightenone
      enlightenone

      @Annony Nonny: Thank you. Nice and sad. A real talent. Surprisingly, I didn’t know his body of work. The advocate article was so authentic and refreshing. This is a piece I will frame for my gay youth clients to see!

      Jul 19, 2014 at 11:04 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • multitasker
      multitasker

      Come on, now, enough with the dichotomism. He wouldn’t be the first person I’ve known of or known personally to have bought into the gay-or-straight BS only to eventually meet the person that forces him to realize he’s more a Kinsey 5 rather than 6. You don’t even have to buy into the Kinsey Scale to recognize that it’s a spectrum. One of the gayest, most effeminate men I know met the woman that proved the point and they’ve been married for over 20 years. He’s not closeted. It simply worked out that way and would that all couples could be as great a match and happy as they are.

      I know this is a necrotic thread, but I only just saw it in Aug 2014. hehheh

      Aug 19, 2014 at 8:27 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

    Add your Comment

    Please log in to add your comment

    Need an account? Register It's free and easy.



  • POPULAR ON QUEERTY

    FOLLOW US
     



    GET QUEERTY'S DAILY NEWSLETTER


    FROM AROUND THE WEB

    !-- Sailthru Horizon -->
    Copyright 2014 Queerty, Inc.
    Follow Queerty at Queerty.com, twitter.com/queerty and facebook.com/queerty.