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Justin Bieber’s Penis Will Be Redacted From Police Security Footage. Sorry, Everyone.

rs_600x600-130702072250-600.biebssThe world is a dark, unforgiving place for anyone that hoped to get a Beiber peen shot out of the Miami-Dade security footage from Justin Bieber’s arrest and urine test last month.

According to Miami-Dade County Judge William Altfield, the 20-year-old pop star may have “lost his expectation of dignity,” but not his expectation of privacy. His junk will be redacted by “shade or blacken” from several videos of his urine test and another of him peeing into a toilet.

The Beebs was arrested late January for drag racing his Lamborghini on a residential South Beach road under the influence of Xanax and marijuana. Footage of his detainment (including visible dick) are to be released under Florida’s public records law that makes evidence open to the media, but Bieber’s defense lawyers have argued that his cock shots being distributed to the public may be “inappropriate.” Pfft.

According to TMZ, video editors are “having a problem” blurring Bieber Jr. from one video “because he moves as he pees.” We’re hoping this means there will ‘accidentally’ be one or two frames of visible dick included, because as consumers of the music industry, we have a right to know what our idols’ genitalia look like.

I wouldn’t sweat it, though. This kid is fully capable of releasing his own cock shots someday in the future. Just be patient.

By:           Matthew Tharrett
On:           Mar 5, 2014
Tagged: , ,
  • 18 Comments
    • Cam
      Cam

      One or two pixels max.

      Mar 5, 2014 at 12:18 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • NG22
      NG22

      @Cam: Right? The freak out of his legal team regarding the penis likely means one thing–there’s not much penis. If he had a Tommy Lee between his legs, I’m sure he’d want people to know.

      Mar 5, 2014 at 1:09 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • viveutvivas
      viveutvivas

      That’s okay, if someone wanted to see a ten year old girl’s penis, they wouldn’t be looking for it on this site anyway.

      Mar 5, 2014 at 1:20 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • SF Native
      SF Native

      Why did this have to come to a legal battle. Everyone (even misguided DBs) deserve privacy when it comes to their private parts. Oh and the argument that he must have a “small” and that is why he is fighting the release of the video, is obnoxious. We all know that no matter what his size, there would be morons who would say he is small.

      Mar 5, 2014 at 1:26 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Caleb in SC
      Caleb in SC

      I know this video is a public record, but I have a very difficult time with the fact that the police feel so free to share this simply because Bieber is involved. I am not a fan of his, but this crosses the line.

      Mar 5, 2014 at 2:03 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • redcarpet
      redcarpet

      His prostitute in Brazil says he’s swinging some pipe.

      To be honest though even if he had John Holmes between his legs his personality is so overpoweringly offensive I have no desire (sexual or otherwise) to see it.

      Just goes to show you physically beautiful people can be just as ugly as anyone.

      Mar 5, 2014 at 2:05 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • SteveDenver
      SteveDenver

      They just don’t know how to blur out the labia.

      Mar 5, 2014 at 3:15 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Bad Ass Biker
      Bad Ass Biker

      @Cam: All one inch of it, right?

      Mar 5, 2014 at 3:26 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Rad
      Rad

      Bieber is a MALE? Every photo I’ve seen of Justin made me think “Wow! Hot lesbian!” Who knew?

      Mar 5, 2014 at 3:39 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Diana
      Diana

      @viveutvivas:

      Come on guys; don’t disrespect (women) like that!

      Mar 5, 2014 at 3:39 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • J2
      J2

      @Caleb in SC: I agree. Next time Americans feel a need to boycot Russian wodka, it wouldnt hurt to look at their own country as well.. Releasing involuntary nude pictures of somebody as a punishment for any crime is an absurd medieval practice..

      Mar 5, 2014 at 3:53 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • LubbockGayMale
      LubbockGayMale

      @J2: Yeah, but it could be used as a powerful deterent to bad acts by some!

      Mar 5, 2014 at 4:02 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Merv
      Merv

      I have to admit that he’s pretty hot, even with those obnoxious tats. Too bad he’s such a DB.

      Mar 5, 2014 at 4:45 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • crowebobby
      crowebobby

      I, for one, would love to see his dick.

      Mar 5, 2014 at 5:13 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • jmmartin
      jmmartin

      Damn!

      Mar 5, 2014 at 8:05 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • jonjct
      jonjct

      i will be happy to have a look and report back to all the above (hilarious) posters ^ who claim they don’t care. this kid has no “pipe” as somebody noted, but still and all, i don’t think I’ve ever not looked if i could have. so, when it leaks, i’m looking.

      Mar 6, 2014 at 9:06 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scoobydube
      scoobydube

      @redcarpet: Of course she is saying that he’s “swinging a pipe”. Just check his WALLET ……

      Mar 6, 2014 at 9:55 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Pax
      Pax

      At least he’s intact like most normal men.

      May 23, 2014 at 6:35 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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