Our worlds are COLLIDING. Here we are, publishing this “blogsite” every day, posting things that tickle our fancy (and things that upset our core). Detached from normal social interaction, we rely on the musings of a rotating roster of YouTube stars to keep us creative, entertained, and aroused. Among them: California’s Leffew family, Queerty‘s adopted web family that’s been posting family videos since Prop 8 passed; and Davey Wavey, the web services fella who never has a shirt on and sells ab routine workouts on the side. And now, THEY ARE FEUDING.
We all know how much you guys love Davey. But little did we know the Leffews share your concerns. But Jay Leffew’s beef isn’t about Davey’s nipples, or his voice, or his spirituality rants. It’s about how, instead of posting a video about Maine’s marriage outcome, Davey instead went with his “Ask a Straight Guy” interview, which we posted yesterday.
“I’m ashamed of him,” says Jay after watching the interview clip. “I wanted to hear something about gay rights. I wanted to hear something about Maine.” Not hearing it, he posted the above rant.
We sort of understand. But not fully.
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
Davey’s “Ask a Straight Guy” video was about gay rights, in his own, sexualized way. No, he didn’t mention Maine in the video, but the Q&A session he had with straight friend Alex dealt with dispelling those ridiculous religious-fueled myths about homosexuality: that we’re gay because a man let us down in life; that letting gays raise kids will turn those kids gay; that heteros sometimes act gayer than we, but are branded masculine.
Meanwhile, it sounds like Jay’s real frustration is aimed at Davey for deleting his comment and then blocking him. HEAVENS! Except: This is the Internet. This is what people do. Childish? Sure. But have you seen some of the comments left on this website? Welcome to the WWW!
Davey’s “Straight Guy Interview” here:
Anon
I think Jay’s needs to stop crying, who says that Davey has to make a video about the results of prop 1? No one! I think you’re right Davey did do a good job with the video and did do a good job with dispelling some of the ridiculous questions people ask.
Joe
No, he doesn’t have to make a video about Maine. However, Davey Wavey is partially to blame for our setbacks. Ignorant sex obsessed f*cks who do nothing but go to the gym hoping for a hookup. We as a community do need to get it together and stop prancing round. We are losing our rights and our lives merely by just existing. So piss off Anon.
gayfamilyvalues
DaveyWavey isn’t required to do anything. Much of what happened yesterday happened in the heat of the moment. Speaking as Jays husband I have to say that yesterday was like living prop 8 all over again. We made THREE videos that day when we normally do about one per week. There was just too much emotion and no where for it to go. Jay still considers himself a fan of Davey and is more irritated at being blocked than anything. He strongly believes that no YouTuber should treat their fanbase that way.
IF DaveyWavey had been willing to discuss Jays initial comment or even just let it drop off the end of the page I’m pretty sure that Jay would have just let it go…but he didnt. Davey found the ONE comment that criticized him In the thousands of comments already on the page and moved swiftly to delete it.
Does Davey, being Canadian, have any obligation to help with marriage equality topics…no…he doesnt…but one day he MAY want to get married and THEN it will be an issue for him.
strumpetwindsock
@ #3
Actually I think we do have an obligation to comment and act on injustices outside our borders… though I think Davey may be excused from including it in his act if he considers it out of character.
And I agree with you that censoring fair comments is pretty galling.
I have had one or two people try to tell me that I have no right to comment because I don’t live in the U.S, and therefore cannot understand how things are down there.
Nonsense. If I’m right I’m right, and if I’m wrong people will see that pretty clearly too. But we all have a right to speak.
marco
@GAYFAMILYVALUES
Davey is American… He lived in Toronto for a bit – but I think he’s back in the states now.
Jayson
Davey has no obligation to say or do anything he does not wish to do. To “expect” him to say something about Maine is not for anyone to say. Many gay folks on youtube said nothing, why single Davey out? Because he is cute and shirtless?
David Dust
Jay is assuming that Davey Wavey knows what Maine is. And that’s a pretty big assumption.
mattymatt
I get where the Leffews are coming from — that posting a little puff piece right after such a major legal setback is disrespectful and aggravating and floozy and confirms all the worst stereotypes of gays as self-absorbed gym bunnies. It would not have killed the twink to have at least mentioned what is happening in Maine.
But.
His viewers are very different from the Leffews’ viewers. Just as it would be unlike the Leffews to suddenly do a bubbly shirtless workout video, Davey just couldn’t pull off a video about earnest heartfelt serious issues. I mean, it’s like criticizing a “Body By Jake” infomercial for failing to addressing the serious issues surrounding Lebanon.
I think what Davey is doing is valuable, in that he is addressing an audience that might not otherwise be addressed about “gayness” and “straightness.” He’s reaching people who don’t care about politics, and talking to them in the only format that they’ll listen to. (Shirtless.)
Yeah, he should now and then toss out stuff like “OMG you guys it really sucks what happened in Maine, here is a URL where you can pledge to help.” But if he changed his format to address serious issues all the time, his viewers would evaporate.
Anon
@jayson
YES THANK YOU!
someone understand things around here!
and Jay you may have been blocked, but know what just deal with it. shit happens, its the interwebz dont shit yourself!
L.Single
Functionally Davey is no different than Ellen DeGeneres, who Leffew also called out. Leffew’s point, without putting words in his mouth, seems to be that if you have a platform, and you are a gay person, you have an obligation on some level to use it for the good of community.
Queerty seems to take that message to heart by mixing gossip, pictures of scantily clad men and politics. Which makes this post a tad disingenuous. Especially the equivocal endorsement of Leffew’s core argument. But I’ve learned not to expect too much from this site.
depfox
Ok just got this letter from a fan of Davey Waveys and it makes the point I was trying to make commenting on his video:
Let me first off introduce myself.
My name is Matt, i’m 19 years old and i live in England (Southwest).
I have only just subscribed to your channel today as i saw Davey Wavey’s video and the comments he recieve from blocking you. Anyhow, this letter isn’t about that…that is just how i found your channel.
After watching your video on Maine (of which i had no idea even happened), i had to pause it at the start and i went on google to look up what Maine was and what was going on. After researching about it and watching your video i felt so sad and upset. This feeling i have never had before. It was kind of like a disapointment in myself, in the world and i actually cried. I find it so hard…no…i find it discusting how in America, the supposed “land of the free” does not accept people for who they are! No one, and i mean NO ONE has the right to tell anyone else what rights they should and should not be able to have. We are all equal, human beings who deserve love and respect in the same amount.
It was very shocking to hear this today and as i researched more about America and it’s fight for gay rights it made me even more angry. I do not know how you guys and many other gay personel can live in a place that does not accept you.
In England, we have the right to get married, we have the right to see our partner/husband in hopsital and we have the right to see any children we have at school meetings. So i really cannot even begin to imagine how you must feel.
As i was growing up, i will not deny that i recieved bullying and discrimination in school and college. However, what made me fight back and stand up to these people was that i knew i had the same rights as them and i knew that they were no more important than i was, nor was i above them. We were all equal.
I do not think that most, not all, but most hetrosexual people understand how it feels to be in the minority and have to fight for BASIC human rights. Still, one day i do hope that they do help us to get what we rightly deserve across the world. However, i do not see this happening even in my life time or the next generation after.
This may sound as if i am rambling on but i am just so frustrated with the America, myself and the world right now. Also i wanted to give you my love and support, because what i think you have achieved in your lives that so many others only can dream of right now is an inspiration to many people. I do not think you really realise what your channel has done. In just under an hour it has made me want to fight even harder and clearly has had a massive impact on other people too.
Hopefully, some day America will be like England and have the same rights for all people. I promise you both that i will always fight for gay rights until to the day i die, and if that is the cause of my death then i will have not died in vain.
Much love all the way from the UK.
Matt
Davey might be about pure entertainment but he does his subscribers and the gay community a real wrong by not educating them from time to time…..
depfox
Let me first off introduce myself.
My name is Matt, i’m 19 years old and i live in England (Southwest).
I have only just subscribed to your channel today as i saw Davey Wavey’s video and the comments he recieve from blocking you. Anyhow, this letter isn’t about that…that is just how i found your channel.
After watching your video on Maine (of which i had no idea even happened), i had to pause it at the start and i went on google to look up what Maine was and what was going on. After researching about it and watching your video i felt so sad and upset. This feeling i have never had before. It was kind of like a disapointment in myself, in the world and i actually cried. I find it so hard…no…i find it discusting how in America, the supposed “land of the free” does not accept people for who they are! No one, and i mean NO ONE has the right to tell anyone else what rights they should and should not be able to have. We are all equal, human beings who deserve love and respect in the same amount.
It was very shocking to hear this today and as i researched more about America and it’s fight for gay rights it made me even more angry. I do not know how you guys and many other gay personel can live in a place that does not accept you.
In England, we have the right to get married, we have the right to see our partner/husband in hopsital and we have the right to see any children we have at school meetings. So i really cannot even begin to imagine how you feel.
Hopefully, some day America will be like England and have the same rights for all people. I promise you both that i will always fight for gay rights until to the day i die, and if that is the cause of my death then i will have not died in vain.
Much love all the way from the UK.
Matt
I think this Letter makes my point about the wrong Davey Wavey does his subscriber base by not educating them on the GLBTQ struggle.
galefan2004
Yes, but in all fairness when anyone says anything you absolutely don’t agree with here they eventually get their comments removed and banned as well, so don’t make yourselves out to be the website child for freedom of speech.
depfox
My husband Bryan thinks B4 he speaks some day i need to learn that skill…. Here is hi Opinion on the Matter
http://gayfamilyvalues.blogspot.com/2009/11/rise-together.html
jimmy
Davey belongs to the Wayne Dyer and Deepok Chopra cults. He extinguishes anything negative, especially criticism or a contrary opinion, that is directed at him.
But, I think Jay is being a bit reactionary in his expectations of Davey, who is not overtly political. Davey believes that everything happens as it is supposed to happen and that all outcomes are correct because the universe is ordered that way. He probably blocked Jay for being negative.
I’m not defending Davey (he doesn’t need it); it’s just my observation.
mattymatt
@Jimmy: Wait is he literally a member of a cult? That’s kind of interesting, if it’s true.
Anon
@jimmy
i think you’re right, he is just trying to keep the negativity down mostly since since it wasn’t relevant to the video he made at all
jimmy
Mattymatt – Well, most cult leaders are snake-oil salesmen. But I’m not using the word ‘cult’ in a literal sense. I’ve been a past reader of Davey’s blog and I’m familiar with the philosophy he advocates.
mattymatt
Ah, I see. Serenity now!
naghanenu
Well..that was bithchy
NoDoubleStandards
Davey is free to be the idiot that he has always been since becoming a Youtube “hit.”
Caleb
Davey is a vapid annoying twat. Does anyone with a brain cell really cares what he has to say about anything? Also I’m sorry but hes not hot at all. Such things shouldn’t matter but when looks and sex are your whole claim to fame you should be able to back it up.
Woah! I just realized Davey Wavey is a male replica of Paris Hilton
BrianZ
Unfortunately I have to agree … expecting a self-serving whore of a queer to consider anyone or anything other than his own interests is way beyond what reality, obviously, is.
And Queerty, your constant pimping of Davey Wavey is tedious. As any Manhunt-whore knows, Davey is quite capable of pimping himself so how about you give it a fuckin rest?
YellowRanger
Davey is an obnoxious himbo, and the Leffews are quickly becoming a self-righteous gay version of the Gosselins(gaysselins?). I have no real interest in what either camp has to say about anything…
boyzboyzboyz
@Mattymatt “Just as it would be unlike the Leffews to suddenly do a bubbly shirtless workout video”
But don’t we all want Bryan to do just that?
I’m not contributing anything to the ‘real’ discussion. I care about looks only. Shazam!
nystreetsmart
Davey Wavey owes nothing to the gay community, he gives plenty to the gay community, davey Wavey is all we need when we JO, he bends over for the community for the gays to have fun inside him, he gives so much imagine how hard it is to work out 5x a week just to have this great ass for us.
Davey im here in support of your ass. god is with you. Amen
Sean Chapin
If gay marriage falls in the middle of Maine
And no one is there to tell the rest of the gays
Do we care about our civil rights?
*****
I respect that Davey Wavey can make any kind of video that he wishes. The problem is we think that these are normal times that allow for these type of normal things.
Ladies and Gentlemen, WE ARE IN A WAR.
We are in a war against a very dangerous resurgent opposition that will not go away for years, and we must do what we can to come together and fight back to not only protect our lives but achieve full equality as human beings in this country. In times of war, we have to do things differently because the war matters more than anything else in our lives because of the very lives we are fighting for. This is why I can absolutely see Jay from the Leffews asking his question to Davey Wavey, and I am utterly alarmed and otherwise speechless that Davey Wavey would delete Jay’s comment and block him from YouTube in response. I am also very disturbed that other prominent gay YouTube channels such as “5awesomegays” haven’t addressed the issue in Maine.
Overall, I am deeply concerned about our complacency and apathy in our LGBT community. We lost Prop 8 and our marriage rights largely because of it. And it seems we’re starting to go back to complacency and apathy after observing the reactions over Maine losing their marriage rights, especially as none of the prominent gay youtube channels have addressed this very troubling development in Maine.
I wonder how many LGBTers care to get married or care about this movement, and I would tell the people who don’t care, “if you think the opposition will stop at protecting marriage equality, think again – next they will come for you, and there will be no one left to help you”.
The opposition attacked domestic partnerships in Washington, and though we may preserve them with an election win, 48% have REJECTED them. It’s not about marriage anymore; it’s now about homophobia and our rights.
The opposition attacked discrimination protection in Kalamazoo, and a very sizable 38% REJECTED this discrimination. Again, this is nowhere close to marriage.
Mike Heath in Maine was quoted today as saying the following:
1) (what’s next) “In the interest of protecting and affirming all of Maine’s people, especially our children and grandchildren, we must repeal domestic partnership laws that provide benefits on the basis of homosexuality,
2) (what’s next after that) “we must defund the so-called “civil rights teams” and remove “sexual orientation and gender identity” from the Maine Human Rights Act and the Maine Civil Rights Act. and
3) (the final nail in the coffin) It would also be prudent to reinstate Maine’s anti-sodomy law that was quietly removed from our criminal code in the late 1970s.
Had we not overturned all sodomy laws with Lawrence v. Texas, then we might picture the scenario of an average guy having sex with another guy in his apartment. The police raid the apartment and handcuff both of them to jail, and the two are eventually slapped with felony charges. Just like what happens elsewhere in this world, just like what may happen years or decades from now in our homeland.
The bottom line is that if not enough of us are willing to join this fight, we will more likely than not lose our war, and who knows if we may all be returning into our closets and living shams of lives that are nothing but shameful.
Therefore, without hesitation, I call on every prominent gay youtuber to make one video by next week that addresses the horrible election in Maine and encourages their audience to do something for our civil rights movement. If Lady Gaga can take time out to promote and speak at the National Equality March, then our prominent gay youtubers can easily speak out behind the camcorder as well to help our fight.
haribo
@sean chapin
um, eloquent…
But when should a whole community, whose diaspora covers every demographic be represented, or as you seem to argue, earnestly owed some kind of elegant cry of freedom from … youtube famewhore wanna-be stars ?????????????????
Why am I always in a war of some kind BTW? Why does it have to be called a war? Isn’t that playing by their rules in some sense, by adopting their language and coda?
Orpheus_lost
So the Leffews are going to spend the time they could be using to do something constructive to instead attack Davey Wavey? Who’s next on their Homo Hitlist, Tinky Winky? Snagglepuss? The exhumed corpse of Paul Lynde? None of them used the day after the election to genuflect at the altar of Leffew, either.
Those guys have really jumped the shark after this.
scott ny'er
daveywavey is cute? AND funny?
oh man, someone is deeeeeeeeluded. IMHO.
really, i played jay’s video and just stopped after he said that. I lost all respect after hearing that shite.
gayfamilyvalues
@ Haribo
“Why am I always in a war of some kind BTW? Why does it have to be called a war? Isn’t that playing by their rules in some sense, by adopting their language and coda?”
I think Sean has already done a good job of elucidating the reason…THEY have declared war on YOU whether you chose to “sink to their level” or not. You don’t need to take my word for it at all…but neither be upset when our rights continue to fail at elections because no one felt the need to support them.
@orpheus_lost
“So the Leffews are going to spend the time they could be using to do something constructive to instead attack Davey Wavey? Who’s next on their Homo Hitlist, Tinky Winky? Snagglepuss? The exhumed corpse of Paul Lynde? None of them used the day after the election to genuflect at the altar of Leffew, either.”
No one has to kiss our behinds. DaveyWavey is free to do whatever the hell he wants BUT…so do we have the right to ask why Davey and all the big gay YouTubers had NOTHING to say about Maine, Washington, Kalamazoo or any dam thing at all. They are entertainment, not political commentary..but with 30,000 people watching them couldn’t they have made ONE video that would have brought some awareness to this issue.
AND further…we dont have to be hysterical about what the conservatives call “culture war”..thats their bullshit. But we DO have to realize that for them it is deadly real. They see us as a stain on society and they are actively working to ratchet back our freedoms one at a time. Washington proves that.
Here, in California, during prop 8 they kept saying how it was “all about the word marriage”. If we didn’t call it marriage they would be o.k. with it…bullshit…because there was Washington, with its civil unions, no mention of marriage what so ever, minding their own business and the same peopel that said they were “o.k. with civil unions” still did all they could to take those away. We need to stand up and pay attention. Ignoring it will not make it go away.
Call us self righteous a holes if you want. It wont change the facts.
Sean Chapin
@HARIBO
Is the fact that I come off as elegant important, or is it the message I’m communicating that’s important. What is the important point, choosing the right word to describe what’s happening between us and our opposition, or the fact that we are in a massive fight against homophobic people?
During times of crisis–and I think Maine losing gay marriage rights is a time of crisis for all of us–even the stars will come out to lend their voices to the cause (this happened days after 9/11). Call them what you want, but the prominent gay youtubers have thousands upon thousands of subscribers, and I wouldn’t be surprised to hear that a good number of them are unaware of what’s going on in our civil rights movement, and it would greatly help all of us if these youtubers could at least mention what happened in Maine. To me, it doesn’t make sense why we don’t do this.
jimmy
@30 – What happened in Maine is not a crisis for me because I don’t live in Maine and I don’t really give a damn what happens in Maine.
Whenever these state initiatives happen, outsiders from both sides of the argument flood into the state and may actually encourage voters to become reactionary and hyper-conservative to show those busy body outsiders that they don’t appreciate non-residents meddling in internal state affairs. In the case of Maine, that would be a very natural way for New Englanders to behave.
My chief concern is what kind of healthcare reform comes out of Washington DC. That is what is most important to my life right now. The equality issue is a constitutional issue. It should not be left up to voters. When we win, it will happen in court or through sweeping congressional legislation. As with previous civil rights advances, many people will not like it, they will not agree and they will still hate. Tough shit.
It was 6 Supreme Court justices that struck down anti-sodomy laws, not voters. And no number of voters can reverse it.
Kurt
You should see this response video to the Lefew family’s video It’s very good!!!
Maine is F***ed!:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2NK3ZB1B5ok
Orpheus_lost
@Gayfamilyvalues
Yeah, I’m going to call you self righteous. You’re just replacing one demand with another. I believe in fighting for equal rights, not exchanging a right wing authoritarian with a left wing one.
Davey Wavey is fluff. If he starts getting serious and deep he loses his audience of people looking for fluff. I don’t blame him for deleting the Leffews’ posts or for blocking them. I would have done the same thing.
As for the Leffews. They need to stop attacking everyone who doesn’t react the exact same way they do and start honestly working on the goal they claim to support so strongly. As someone upthread mentioned, they’re in danger of becoming the gay, YouTube Gosselins. Nothing but drama and hyperbole.
NoDoubleStandards
A ho is a ho is a ho. Davey’s a ho. Don’t expect mo.
PopSnap
Actually, they both represent very important parts of the LGBT community.
Leffews- the activists, the ones who straight people are surprised to hear are gay, the gay-friendly church members, the GSA members.
Davey Wavey- OMG guyz lets go to the beach all day! I’m a twink. I love my gurlfrands, and penis. If you dont like me, then fuck you bitch, and I’ll say as much to your face.
The latter is our stereotype, and we’d actually do good to keep people like Davey Wavey going. They are the lazy drunken frat boys; the gangster rappers; the blonde bimbos of the gay community. That way, people can look at those of us who arent stereotypical and think “Well, they arent so bad!” I dont consider myself an Uncle Tom cause I act like the first kind, I love being known as “well, he’s gay but hes not a flamer”.
Because, yes, although I have flaming friends I do get embarressed to be around them some times. And I would tell any living soul of my sexuality if they asked.
Eire
@Jimmy
About the whole thing about living in Maine, Read a Poem called “First They Came”, I think that sums up “but I don’t live in Maine” perfectly,
But I do agree that Healthcare is our current priority at the moment, but Senate reform as well as reform of the FED or outright ending of it should be our next priority, there are many more problems on the horizon that may sink us in times to come.
Matthew
I think that Jay has a very valid point, for some one any one especially some one with a public spot light to not use it to point out when such and massive injustice has been carried out is truly no better in that situation the the people that carried it out. For it only takes people to stand on the side line while injustice is committed and not raise their voice in objection to allow the injustice to continue. Yes he may not be overly political but that dose not mean you can not make a simple observation about how Main was a set back.
As much as I like some of DavieWavy’s video’s he is way to wish washy out there, his tendency to just say things happen for a reason thus no effort should be made to point out that the out come was wrong or bad nor an effort made to change it, is absolutely ridiculous. And to squash any comment that slightly critical is outrageous, I guess I must just be strange in belaving in pretty open speech even if it is on my very tinny YouTube page. I believe that as long as the comment is not overly vulgar/obscene and is not just simply a call for physical violence against any group (be it LGBT straight religious etc) the poster has a right to express their opinion of me, my content, and my views.
Lex
Wow a heated discussion over an internet hissy fit. lmao
Michael
If you would do a little research you would find Davey has done more for gay rights than most would believe. If you keep up with his blog he lets you know what he did for a previous job and he doesn’t have to boast or brag about his achievements to anyone. It’s his blog and he posts what he wants to. He is always getting attacked and he doesn’t feel the need to reply because that is another person’s opinion and it is wasted energy to try and change their thoughts.
GeoVaughn.com
I don’t think Davey whatever is cute @ all…