So, what do sleazy Hollywood dad Michael Lohan and sleazy Girls Gone Wild honcho Joe Francis have in common?

Well, yes, they're both sleazy - that's obvious - but there's more than just that: both men hate DJ Sam Ronson, Lindsay Lohan's lesbian girlfriend.

Mr. Lohan lashed out at Ronson earlier this year, calling her "hideous" and taking on her hygiene habits. Francis doesn't care about Ronson's cleanliness, but does have some less than kind words for the 31-year old, whom he describes as "very jealous:" "Samantha tried to start a fight with me. I care about Lindsay - she's not gay. She's being controlled by this…wretched woman, this Samantha."

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Realizing it had been a while since he last caused trouble, evil Hollywood father Michael Lohan last weekend wrote a letter again taking on his daughter Lindsay's lesbian girlfriend, Sam Ronson.

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Well, that was fast!

After Lindsay Lohan issued a statement to Access Hollywood in response to her father's cries for attention and then Samantha Ronson posted a MySpace rant about Michael's idiocy, Linds took to her MySpace to vent some more. Because evidently enough hurtful things haven't been said amongst the Lohan clan.

We feel for Lindsay a bit, because her father truly is a media whore, but she lost us when she insisted that her mother is the goddess of all things pure and good in this world. Um, no. To make matters worse, she also does that weird thing with the hyphens, just like Sam. She also reveals that she's in therapy. We wonder why…

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We've come to the conclusion that the Lohan clan can't survive without being involved in some sort of public feud. The last was with America's hero, Anderson Cooper, but this time they're keeping it inside the family and battling patriarch Michael Lohan. Oh boy!

Upon news that Lindsay's girlfriend Samantha Ronson plans to write a tell-all, Michael went into a tirade accusing Sam of using LiLo for fame. Mike's not so self-aware, is he? In response, Lindsay pulled her dad aside and had a mature talk about how his actions hurt her. Just kidding, she went to Access Hollywood to announce that her father is "out of control."

So now it's Samantha's turn, and she unleashed her anger via MySpace…

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"Sources" claim that actress Lindsay Lohan wants to wed her alleged lesbian love, Sam Ronson. While some of us may think that's just grand, Lohan's father, Michael, says he can't endorse their potential same-sex marriage, but insists he supports their plans:

…If the couple were to wed, Lohan’s dad Michael probably wouldn’t play the proud father giving away the bride.

“I haven’t heard anything (about an upcoming wedding) from Lindsay, but if she was marrying Sam, I don’t think she’d ask me to walk her down the aisle,” says Michael. “She knows about my (Christian) faith…she just wouldn’t ask.”

That’s not to say that he doesn’t support Lindsay and a possible relationship with Ronson, he just supports her in more indirect ways.

“I want her to be happy and healthy and stay on the right path,” he says. “If I discuss (her relationship), I say that I want her to be happy.”

She'd probably be happiest if you stopped discussing her in the media, putz.

Michael Lohan couldn’t resist stopping by Chelsea Lately the other night to respond to the latest allegations that he fathered yet another Lohan while married to Dina (but they were on a break!). Chelsea put his skeeziness on hold to discuss more important matters: Camel balls. Apparently such a thing exists, and the former inmate suffers from it.

Click through for the video - if you dare!

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Ain't that sweet? Lindsay Lohan's fresh outta rehab and hamming it up with dear old dad! Months of detox didn't take the starlet's sense of humor. She describes her third stint in a year: "It was a sobering experience." Oh, zinger!

Lohan's exclusive (!) interview with OK does take a serious turn when she confesses: "I hit rock bottom. Everything in my life came to a point where I had to make a decision." Yeah, we go to rehab every time we have to make a decision, too.

Meanwhile, aforesaid father Michael's got a new lady friend. And, shocker, she looks like a future version of dear daughter Lindsay.

Frightful!

Lindsay Lohan will reportedly be leaving in-patient rehab at Cirque Lodge in Utah. Her father, Michael, says he's going to oversee her outpatient treatment:

I’m looking forward to spending the next week with her. We’ve been in constant phone contact. She’s in a great, great place now. I’ve never heard her so honest, contrite and focused.

Lindsay is weeding out all the bad. She’s taking a step back and re-evaluating her life. What she tells - her honesty and openness - has brought me to tears. It’s beyond words how proud I am of her.

Aren't we all? We'll be even more proud if she's learned to put that pussy away.