Now We Know What Jesus Would Do

Aussie Gay Activist Gets Death Threats

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Gay activism can be potentially dangerous work.

Just ask Australian national Ben Cooper, who’s been receiving nasty missives from irate enemies. One not-so-loving note commands, “I know where you live. If you don’t stop, it will be stopped for you.” Not too terribly original, but it gets the point across, we suppose. Another self-proclaimed Christian offered this blasphemous blurb: “You are going to die at the hands of Jesus”. We heard a rumor that Jesus planned a comeback, but we had no idea he had such evil, murderous plans. We expected more…

Despite the threats, Cooper pledged to carry on with his mission. He does, however, exercise a bit of caution when out and about: “It has affected my social life to some extent, I feel like I’m looking over my shoulder all the time.”

Note to Cooper: be on the lookout for a bearded man wearing sandals and a tattered robe.