TRAILER PARK

One Direction’s Documentary Film Has Arrived, Includes Lots Of Homoerotic Nakedness

Earlier today, the Heavens opened as God himself hand-delivered the trailer for One Direction’s upcoming docu-concert film, 1D: This Is Us.

It’s a sneak peak into the lives of the world’s favorite pubescent boys, a front-row seat to the concert where Harry Styles was pants’d, and a heavy tear-jerker all rolled into one. It will undoubtedly remain the #1 film worldwide for 67,352 weeks.

We highly recommend it for those of you that just “don’t get” the whole One Direction thing. If the excessive baby pictures don’t choke you up, Zayn Malik buying his mother a home surely will. If those don’t work, there’s still plenty of homoerotic, boy-on-boy affection that’s sure to excite you.

As a bonus, the trailer also provides a sampling of their latest, “Best Song Ever.” The film is set to premiere in the US on August 30, which is just TOO FAR AWAY.

So grab a tissue box, start screaming uncontrollably, and press play. This trailer will change your life.

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8 Comments

  • MikeE

    Yeah, um, no.

  • DickGreenleaf

    ” BORRRRRRRRing”-Joanne Worley

  • yaoming

    Did I somehow miss the “Lots Of Homoerotic Nakedness” and “homoerotic, boy-on-boy affection”?

  • Jackhoffsky

    It looks cute, for what it is… and heartwarming (i’m sure). But their music… is… awful (personal opinion only) and so on the general, I’m with MikeE.

  • erikwm

    Your use of “pre-pubescent” seems to indicate you don’t know what puberty is. One Direction is most certainly not pre-pubescent. They’re not 11 or 12 years old. They’ve gone through puberty.

  • rcs831

    What 11 year old girl wrote this article. I’m embarrassed about it for so many reasons.

  • Ted Lemen

    It DIDN’T say pre-pubescent….just pubescent.

  • Niall

    @rcs831: I was just coming to say this. If the writer of this article is a grown man and not someone in his teens then I’m very afraid.

Comments are closed.