In case you hadn’t noticed, hockey’s Championship Series in on, and they’re playing for the Stanley Cup. It’s the Chicago Blackhawks vs. the Boston Bruins (go here for a photo appreciation), and Chicago in particular is nuts for their team, including this Art Institute lion, decked out in a badass black Blackhawk helmet.
On the following pages are some other reasons Chicagoans, and you, should be psyched for the Stanley Cup: the Boys of the Blackhawks, based purely on their appearance. We can talk more after we actually watch a game.
Jonathan Toews
Maybe everything about this is hot.
Center, Captain
Number: 19
Height: 6′ 2″
Weight: 208
Shoots: Left
Age: 25
Bryan Bickell
Woof.
Left Wing
Number: 29
Height: 6′ 4″
Weight: 233
Shoots: Left
Age: 27
Johnny Oduya
The black guy from Sweden. Who knew?
Number: 27
Height: 6′ 0″
Weight: 190
Shoots: Left
Age: 31
Brandon Bollig (above left)
When the ice thawed, there was this.
Left Wing
Number: 52
Height: 6′ 2″
Weight: 223
Shoots: Left
Age: 26
Brandon Saad
Say no more. No really, don’t speak. Just, don’t speak.
Left Wing
Number: 20
Height: 6′ 1″
Weight: 202
Shoots: Left
Age: 20
Patrick Sharp
Made to order for the cover of Chicago magazine, right? Check.
Left Wing
Number: 10
Height: 6′ 1″
Weight: 199
Shoots: Right
Age: 31
Ben Smith
Post-Game Meal: A nice steak, sweet potato and broccoli. He’s thinking about it in this pic, right?
Right wing
Number: 28
Height: 5′ 11″
Weight: 207
Shoots: Right
Age 24
Corey Crawford
Hey, buddy. You got a sec to talk about your lips?
Goaltender
Number: 50
Height: 6′ 2″
Weight: 208
Catches: Left
Age: 28
Ryan Stanton
Wait, what?! Yes.
Defenseman
Number: 55
Height: 6′ 2″
Weight: 196
Shoots: Left
Age: 23
Niklas Hjalmarsson
Super Swedish pretty
Defenseman
Number: 4
Height: 6′ 3″
Weight: 207
Shoots: Left
Age: 26
Viktor Stalberg
Leader of the Swedish Mafia. Hot.
Right Wing
Number: 25
Height: 6′ 3″
Weight: 209
Shoots: Left
Age: 27
SparkyNH
Why was I expecting Patrick Kane to be the big finale, and dumbfounded to see that he’s not even listed?
Empyrean
So, this ISN’T a take-out menu?
Maaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnn……… 🙁
Jackhoffsky
Hellooo Captain.
hudson
other than speedskater ass, it doesn’t come much better than hockey ass.
Mike
They must all have curved dicks. They all shoot left or right. None of them shoot straight!
balehead
Extremely hawt masculine guys!!….Hopefully the jealous “controlls” won’t show up……
HernanMinogue
I’d go for Jonathan Toews, Patrick Kane, Corey Crawford, and Patrick Sharp. I have a thing for white men. I also think Patrick Kane & Jonathan are pretty hot with their beards.
HernanMinogue
@assbutt: take your homophobe ass somewhere else
Freeforall
No only is hockey the most exciting sports, it’s the sexiest. Go Leafs Go!
Ryan
How can you mention the Art Institute’s Lion and not mention the Field Museum’s Brachiosaurus! Google “Field Museum Blackhawks” to see what I mean.