POP BROWNIES

Helen Mirren Queens Out on Queens, Bieber Gets Attacked, Mama June Gets Hitched & More!

queen-helen

Dame Helen Mirren ain’t nothing to fucks with. Drummers marching for the As One in the Park festival learned that the hard way when Mirren, dressed as Queen Elizabeth for her performance in The Audience, rained all over their gay parade.

– Iron Man 3 took in $175 million over the weekend. Hope you’re happy, America, Robert Downey Jr.‘s ego is about to engulf you in its charming, vicelike embrace.

dodson-do– A fond remembrance of noted heterosexual Antonie Dodson‘s inimitable style. He was so close to getting his wig game together too. Sad.

Mick Jagger‘s still got it.

Beyoncé says that Blue Ivy needs company. We were super excited until we realized Bey meant a sibling and not a grown ass man as a playmate.

– Meanwhile, the toddler’s selling out tours at a junior diva level.

– An unholy alliance if there ever was one: Kanye, Kim and Anna Wintour.

– Battle of the Upfronts. Which shows have been cancelled and renewed? Who cares, everyone watches cable, right?

Kevin Spacey has come out as a new dog owner.

– Looks like Lauryn Hill is going to jail after all. Realizing that she’ll be busy for a while, L-Boogie released her first single in three years.

– Meet America’s other First Couple: Mama June of the prestigious Honey Boo Boo clan — serving gift-wrapped realness — tied the knot with Sugar Bear.

– Everyone thinks Lindsay Lohan’s done cocaine “so many times” but she hasn’t okay?! You put Colombia out of business and suddenly it’s all, “LiLo’s got a coke problem!”

– Also, there’s a special place in hell for this kind of lying.

– Warning, this video is terrifying and the girlish squeals will haunt your dreams. The subject is a deranged fan who has succumbed to the dreaded Bieber Fever. Seriously, homeboy took out a piano. Don’t mess with those Beliebers, they’ve got that crackhead strength: