Comedian Mano Agapion’s tips on how to succeed on Grindr have us in mildly uncomfortable stitches.
Clearly tongue-in-cheeck, his “advice” is so brutally on the nose that if you followed it, it might actually get you laid — for the worst possible reasons.
“You need a hot pic of your torso that says ‘I move fast and I don’t respect myself.'” Check.
“Be curt, be dismissive, and by all means, be abusive. It’s important to come off ‘masc,’ and nothing is more masculine than treating strangers like your sexual property.” Check.
Related: Man Tries Convincing Girlfriend That “All Guys” Have Grindr On Their Phones
“Don’t nag people about their status — nothing kills a boner as quickly as responsible questions.” Check.
“Stick to these helpful tips, and you’ll contract an STD in no time.” Does that mean we win?
The video is an offshoot of Mano’s Grindr Diary sketch comedy show in Los Angeles, which is chock full of outrageous Grindr experiences inspired by real-life events (we’ve all been there) — itself an offshoot from Instagram. So 2016.
Mano tells Queerty: “The show is an extension of my Instagram account: Grindr Diary. I started writing the show after accidentally accumulating a handful of insane Grindr experiences.”
Indeed, a quick glance through the feed is rife with comedic potential:
Related: 15 People You’d Never Expect To See On Grindr
He added: “Grindr has changed the rules for dating in the gay world in some ways for the better and some ways for the Goddamn worst. The live show is my love/hate letter to Grindr.”
Check out the video below, and head here for more info on the show:
Billy Budd
OMG The Grindr Diary dialogues are HILARIOUS. I laughed so much I almost got a nose bleed. Please, I want more of it!
AtticusBennett
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1c3fviN1hO0
AtticusBennett
this, btw, is my new fave thing EVER
https://www.instagram.com/bluejasminegrindr/
virtuoso1980
It’s funny but some were obviously forced. He’d say “Hey where’d you go?” as if he had chased them off, but the time stamp shows the same minute as the other guy’s last message.
robho3
@AtticusBennett:
That is hilarious – I think I’m gonna try that.
Benjamin Alexander Starr
Nathan Wilson Brenton Gazzard ð???
iggy6666
@AtticusBennett: get some new material bud. You’ve shamelessly self promoted that video no less then a dozen times. Yours truly
WIMPY ANONYMOUS COWARDLY MASCULINE TROLL.
heavylifter
Mano Agapion obviously has a chip on her shoulder after many failed attempts on Grindr to score a buff,straight acting stud to pound her pussy.
Its basically a meme – fem or fatty gets rejected by everyone except the thirstiest deviants on Grindr so she feels compelled to start a Social Justice crusade against the unfairness of it all.
It would be great to hear from some of Agapion’s Grindr victims, I’m sure they would have some very interesting stories on her Grindr behaviour.
Tyler Goodwin
Trevor Frazee lmao
Michael Paul
LOL sexual property. Sadly all over the world this is so true. Want romance don’t do the apps.
Anthony Teitzel
I followed these and within 20 mins i had sex
James Rice
Jordan Henry Austin Warren
brparkrunner
I taught my little brother, 54yo and straight, to use Grindr for buying weed when he travels. Well, I think he used to be straight.
GC1985
@iggy6666: Nobody wants to hear your constant whining. If you don’t like the video someone has posted, don’t comment.
@heavylifter: So says heavylifter… the heavylifter of budweiser six packs. So you’re now claiming to be a top and you also claim to be a muscular gym stud who supports Ted Cruz? Wow… have any other stories you want to share?
Masc Pride
Don’t like Grindr? Have a problem with the guys on it? Stay off of it! Problem solved.
@heavylifter: Totally agree. The guys that get so worked up over Grindr and the guys on it (that didn’t want them) are just showing that they have incredibly low self-esteem.
Stefano
@Masc Pride:”Don’t like Grindr? Have a problem with the guys on it? Stay off of it! Problem solved.” That’s exactly what i did.