What’s better than paying ten or more dollars to witness Green Generic Franchise Building Block and Snack Chips-Plus-Toys-Plus-Hand-Sanitizer Marketing Assistant Lantern? [Note: Yes, we’ve seen it already. It’s boring.] How about this press junket video conducted by MTV’s Josh Horowitz where GL co-stars Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds are asked simple, unwinnable yes/no questions, such has “Ryan, do you think you have better abs than Ryan Gosling?”
Horowitz is treading on thicker ice with Reynolds, whose innate Canadian politeness and gallantry would dictate that he does, indeed, have to answer that Gosling has better abs, even though the comparison shots would suggest that Gosling’s are merely chiseled from a supermetallic alloy and Reynolds’s are straight-up comic book-quality and somehow possess negative amounts of protective adipose. You’re welcome to debate this important topic amongst yourselves, of course.
Anyway, it’s with Lively where things get a tiny bit testy, since the interviewer begins his series of jabs with the Gossip Girl-baiting, “Blake, isn’t ‘Serena van der Woodsen’ a stupid name?” only to see the actress tighten up a little and think silently to herself, “Oh, right, this is the ‘wacky’ junket moment” before responding with a breathy, “No.”
Reynolds suggests that, if provoked, Lively will “unsheath her wrath,” which would be pretty cool to see go down, honestly. But back to the real issue: lumpy, cheese-grating-ready muscles and the male privilege of objectifying every single damn thing that crosses our field of vision. If forced to choose, we’ll opt out and go for the latest shots of Ben Cohen. Sometimes it’s that extra layer of sinew-obscuring butterfat that really ices the cake.