If you don’t know who Courtney Stodden and Doug Hutchinson are, then you’re obviously not fans of bottom-feeder “celebrity” gossip like we are.
Courtney is a 17-year-old fame whore with “the face of a 60-year-old cocktail waitress.” Doug is her 51-year-old husband. Oh yeah, and he was in The Green Mile. (Which came out when Courtney was 4-years-old.)
Courtney fancies her self the 21st century Pamela Anderson—if Pammy still had her’s learner’s permit and talked like she washed down a fistful of Valium with some Dr. Pepper.
Seriously. Have you seen her Tweets? Here’s a few choice examples:
“As ivory butterflies freely float through the sky & beatific birds spread their wings to fervently fly; I lie beneath it all feeling serene!”
“Sensually standing under the showers scalding hot stream of spice as it slowly starts to melt me into sweet sugar! Mmm It’s Savory Saturday!”
“Displaying my provocative physique around the house as it’s dazzlingly saturated in soft-ticklish boa-feathers… Mmm… MEOW! ;-x”
So of course they’re shopping a reality series. And we’ve got the early footage.
Okay so it’s actually Jessica and Hunter‘s Beth Crosby and friend doing a faux eHarmony ad as Doug and Court. Below is the actual May-December-of-next-year couple being interviewed. We defy you to tell the difference.
We can’t get married in Illinois but this troll and his child bride can laugh all the way to bank. God bless America!