Wedding Bells Are Gonna Chime For Rufus Wainwright After All

Canadian Chanteur Rufus Wainwright ruffled some rainbow feathers back in 2008 when he told the New York Press, “Oddly enough, I’m actually not a huge gay marriage supporter.” The singer changed his tune a few years later, though, saying, “I wasn’t a huge gay marriage supporter before… but since meeting [boyfriend] Jörn [Weisbrodt] that all changed.”

Now it looks like Wainwright, 39, has made a complete 180: He and Weisbrodt have announced they’re going to wed this August in Montauk, NY.

He might be settling down, but Wainwright hasn’t lost his gift for surprising statements: “I’ve been with Jörn for about five years, and I’m not finding anything better… I’ve certainly traveled the world and had opportunities to fall out of line, and it doesn’t ever seem to happen,’ he says. “Or, you know, I just keep wanting to go back to him.”

The couple already share a daughter, Viva, with Lorca Cohen, daughter of legendary musician Leonard Cohen.

Photo via Rubenstein

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  • Fitz

    His mom was an amazing singer, who passed a year or two ago– I wonder if that
    made him think more long term.

  • irisgirl

    Mazel Tov and best wishes for a beautiful wedding and a lifetime of joy! I’m sure
    his mother will be with him in spirit.

  • the crustybastard

    “I don’t support gay marriage generally because I don’t want one personally” is nearly the same selfish “it’s-all-about-me” crap we get from the Maggie Gallaghers of the world.

    It’s swell Mr. Wainwright has found a person he wants to make a commitment with, but frankly he really should be mortified that’s the reason he changed his mind.

    It makes him sound like a putz.

  • QJ201

    I really wish Rufus would shut his damn mouth. He always comes off as an *sshole.

  • Isaac C

    @the crustybastard: I doubt you are someone who really knows anything about Wainwright. You don’t know his life or what his feelings are about marriage equality/gay rights as a whole. Reducing your opinion of him based on one statement about gay marriage is ridiculous. And for you to equate his opinion with someone like Maggie Gallagher is, frankly, stupid and only shows your own narrow-mindedness.

  • Activist

    I agree. He comes off as so self-obsessed and self-centered here. He is only now supporting same-sex marriage rights because HE wants to get married. When he had no one to marry, he could not be bothered. I guess it’s all about him. Really, LGBT celebs — Rufus, Cynthia Nixon, etc. — really need to watch what they say much more carefully and with more community mindedness.

  • Mr. Robertson

    Goddamn it, Rufus! I like you so much, but you should really know when to shut up.

  • the crustybastard

    @Isaac C:

    I know I’m on the right track when I earn derision from a moron like you.

    Thanks a million!

  • Isaac C

    @the crustybastard: I’m not deriding you, I’m showing you why you’re wrong and how your thinking is flawed.

  • Lefty

    Haven’t seen him mentioned in years.
    So it’s a great idea to get back in the press.
    Maybe he has another dreary new album coming out soon?

  • Stark

    @the crustybastard:

    While I agree that it comes off as a bit selfish, it is similar to when another celebrity does nothing to help fund a particular disease’s research until they (or someone they love) is diagnosed with said disease, which also comes off as selfish.

    However, your argument is fallacious, you are assuming that because he was not ‘with’ you, that he was ‘against’ you. And because he doesn’t fight with you towards the advancement of gay marriage, you equate him with Maggie Gallagher who actively fights against your right to marry.

    You do yourself (and the Queerty community) a disservice by not educating yourself first. His initial statement regarding gay marriage was… “I’m actually not a huge gay-marriage supporter. […] I think that any law or amendment to the Constitution that deals with sex and love should just be banned in general … Frankly, if you want to marry a dog, why don’t you go ahead and marry a dog?”

  • Isaac C

    @Stark: Always nice to know there are reasonable and intelligent people here instead of all the knee-jerks.

  • the crustybastard

    @Isaac C:

    You don’t know me, but you’re criticizing me for criticizing someone I don’t know. But somehow MY thinking is flawed. LOL.

    You’re just precious. You really are.

  • Isaac C

    @the crustybastard: I’m criticizing your criticism and assumptions about someone else. You began the issue with attacking Wainwright.

  • Interesting

    This strikes me as a horrible statement

    ““I’ve been with Jörn for about five years, and I’m not finding anything better… I’ve certainly traveled the world and had opportunities to fall out of line, and it doesn’t ever seem to happen,’ he says. “Or, you know, I just keep wanting to go back to him.”

    Translation: I can’t find anything better so I am settling for Jorn. Must make Jorn feel real special. Why can’t he just say he loves Jorn?

  • Eric

    @the crustybastard: My favorite part: When Isaac talks about criticizing the “flaws” in other people’s “thinking.” That man has the self-awareness of a dim-witted baboon. (Oh and Isaac, sweetie: Don’t bother replying. I don’t give a $%&# what your tired ass has to say.)

  • the crustybastard


    No, gay rights not like a disease. If that’s not already evident to you, I’m not sure anyone could explain it in a way you could grasp.

    Also, it’s a logical fallacy to misrepresent someone’s statements just to argue they’re logically flawed. Wainwright’s motive is selfish (which you concede) as Maggie Gallagher’s motive is selfish. That makes the motives similar, which is what I said.

    Anyway thanks for sharing the rest of Wainright’s quote. Now I realize he’s not just a selfish putz, he’s a fucking idiot with the mental horsepower of a goddam grapefruit. “I think you should be able to marry a dog.” Christ, what an asshole.

  • Shannon1981

    Rufus is one of those people who really needs to start consulting his publicist before opening his mouth.

  • Stark

    @the crustybastard:

    That’s a clever straw man attack you have there, I’m not going to follow it up.

    As for Mrs. Gallagher’s motives, I don’t know them, but if I had to guess, I would say ignorance and hatred. Of course, I admit, I have not seen her entire body of ‘work’.

    As for Mr. Wainwright, I’m glad to see he has found someone who makes him happy.

  • TJ Parker

    @the crustybastard: Hasn’t he always been a bit of a putz?

  • prince of snides aka divkid

    well, i’ll say only this, rufus is a maverick artiste type and that naturally entails quite a bit of selfish egotism, iconoclasm or general cuntery; basically they’re spoilt, obstreperous children (brett eastman ellis, anyone!)

    not that we should give out free passes to these people. but don’t expect them to lead us into the promised land either. it’s not their role. and they’d only trash it when they get bored.

    (oh, and “the art teacher” is a work of fuckin genius.)

  • the crustybastard


    LOL. No, that’s not a straw man attack, and claiming it is doesn’t make you look smart. Rather, the opposite.

    There is no such thing as a gay North American who is conceptually unaware of “gay rights.” For a gay person to ignore those issues because they imagine it doesn’t affect them is indeed selfish. There are lots and lots of celebrities who are utterly unaware of the existence of neurofibromatosis, Kawasaki disease, etc. However, it is functionally impossible to ignore that which you are unaware of; therefore, selfishness cannot be the motivation behind something that is not even an act.

    Thus, your comparison is inapt.

    Maggie Gallagher genuinely believes every gay marriage creates some sort moral antimatter that devalues every heterosexual marriage. Thus, Rufus Wainwright’s marriage will take something away from her own marriage. That makes her motive selfish.

    @TJ Parker:

    Beats me. Not a fan, and now I definitely intend to stay that way.

  • Cam

    People like Wainwright and Elton John crack me up.

    Wainright gives a few interviews saying he is not a marriage supporter. John actually attack gay marriage supporters.

    Then when they want to do it…my my my, how lucky Wainright is that all of those silly fools wasted their time getting marriage rights in NY State for his lazy ass.

    Congrats to the couple, but sometimes folks need to think a little before they speak out.

    Say you aren’t interested in getting married YOURSELF, but to say you aren’t a supporter of a right in general is just foolish. It would be like a woman who hasn’t voted in 10 years saying she isn’t a supporter of women’s right to vote.

  • Stark

    @the crustybastard:

    Just because you don’t feel that you made a straw man attack, doesn’t mean that you did not. Unfortunately, you can’t change the definition of something to fit your whim. You distorted my original argument and then refuted that distortion, that is a classic straw man attack. You can look it up, it’s on the internet. Since you are resorting to either lies or genuine ignorance and laziness to the point that you can’t even look it up, which you also displayed to a degree when originally representing Mr. Wainwright’s original position without looking that up, I can see that you prefer to win your case by posting the most rather than logically discussing it.

  • Isaac C

    @Stark: I agree.

  • prince of snides aka divkid

    @the crustybastard:
    crusty, i respect you, i really do. (when i grow up i want to be like you) ;-)

    i entirely understand why your down on this guy.

    nevertheless, notwithstanding his evident flaws as a human, can you so peremptorily write him off as an artist?

    surely you can’t be unmoved by the sheer exquisite gem that is “the art teacher”? (if you haven’t heard it i’d be fascinated to get your take on it, and trust you to be fair): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M1ReFah2lCQif

    i know of only, say, a handful of his contemporaries who could speak to the gay experience so defiantly, unashamedly; which he does in most of his songs. yes, this sounds like special pleading, but we certainly don’t get that openness in elton and george michael et al. as they timidly negotiated those tricky pronouns.

    true, he’s one of those promised gay messiah artists that threatened to capture the mainstream but didn’t quite live up to their potential and/or squandered it. but he has his moments. he does try to raise gay pop sensibility above much of the dreck that passes for gay culture (yeah, i’m an unashamedly elitist arty cunt like that.) oh, and he references bea arthur in a song. so not all bad then.

  • the crustybastard


    Your comparison was poorly considered for the reasons I explained. That’s not a straw man argument, nimrod.

    If my explanation was wrong, you could have made the case why. You didn’t. Instead, you just keep stamping your foot and yelling “straw man!! straw man!! STRAW MAN!!!”

    It’s boring and not persuasive to anyone but a lackwit like Isaac C.

    Done with you. Have a super day.

  • geoff

    Good for him, but the logic behind his reasoning for not supporting marriage is severely flawed.

  • Halston

    Well, I support him for saying what he thinks without a publicist and telling the world how he truly feels instead of the sanitized PC answers that people now are expected to give (which when you really think about it we have come to a point where we expect people to lie). I don’t care about and/or support Gay marriage either (and I never ever plan on being married and have been with my partner for almost 13 years), but if there are those of us who would like to have the right to be married-well I say have it.

  • Cam

    @Halston: said…

    “I don’t care about and/or support Gay marriage either”

    Congratulations on buying into your second class status.

  • Halston

    @Cam: If that is how you feel well I respect your feelings, but I don’t feel that way. And, I’m not trying to stand in your way from living the life that you feel you should have. My point is that I’m glad Rufus spoke his mind no matter how much you dislike it instead of not saying how he really feels because you wouldn’t agree or it goes against the mainstream in the Gay community. And, I feel that way about other topics in our society as well not just related to gay issues where I believe people are forced to agree with things in public for fear of backlash- but in private that is not how they truly feel. Just because your gay does not mean or should it mean that you have to care about gay marriage. We all have one thing in common and that is being Gay, but everything else about us as individuals can be quite different from each other and Gay marriage for me is something I do not value and if you feel that’s me buying into 2nd class citizenship that is fine by me.

  • Drew

    I agree with Activist, Rufus has used so much meth he’s burnt out from it. Halston is correct I know a lot of LGBT people who are not for same gender marriage and think that there are way more important issues at stake like passing ENDA as a law.

  • BubbasBack

    He has a big head. Burp.

  • mary

    I LOVE RUFUS. I’m so happy he found someone to spend his life with. We all change our mind and opinions over the years. Don’t be so hard on him. He is genuinely a nice guy, who just has a sarcastic sense of humor. Gotta love him for that.. (or not, but I do)
    Good Luck, and best wishes for a happy marriage.

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