We were best friends in high school. We had a happy marriage and we had a very active sex life. Because of my lack of experience with other men I thought he was metrosexual… Maybe also I didn’t want to look beyond that because… I was afraid to be alone and afraid to admit that I’d made a mistake. About two thirds of the way through our marriage he started therapy and he realized that he was bisexual but choosing to live his life with me… I didn’t really absorb how that made me feel, [and only thought] that he must really love me if he’s not only being honest with me but choosing to live his life with me…
Ultimately I did divorce him and it was not because he was gay, because he hadn’t come out, it was because he was way too controlling… I had to find my own voice and become centered with who I was outside of the relationship… He begged me not to leave and he was extremely angry for doing so… He didn’t talk to me, and when the show [The Nanny] ended, he moved to New York… A year after the show ended our manager called and told him, ‘Fran has cancer,’ and he immediately burst into tears and… his anger melted away and all that was left was the love… from that point forward we began to rebuild all we had.
… when he finally came out it was a huge relief for me because I had harbored so much guilt for having hurt him by abandoning him and divorcing him… the divorce he so adamantly didn’t want at the time gave him the opportunity to explore his authentic self.
- Actress Fran Drescher discussing her relationship with her gay-ex husband.
Image via Manfred Werner – Tsui