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GOProud’s Gays Don’t Really Like Gay People

Matt Hissey, a junior at Westchester University who volunteers with GOProud, was at Thursday night’s party hosted by Andrew Breitbart — to deliver the soundbite heard ’round the gay world: “I don’t really like gay people.” Already dubbed “Matt Hissey-fit,” the young man who loves himself some tea partying exclaims, “Stereotypical gay people frustrate me.” And isn’t Hissey just the quote machine, telling a reporter before the party, “We believe that conservatism is a vast umbrella. We’re just another demographic the conservatives have.” Well, not “someone who puts on a total act. I understand some guys are feminine, which is fine. But some guys are at some points normal, straight-acting, and the next moment they’re jumping up and down.”

By:           JD
On:           Feb 12, 2011
Tagged: , ,

  • 127 Comments
    • Mr. Enemabag Jones
      Mr. Enemabag Jones

      They must have loved this twink in the men’s room.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 12:19 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Martin81
      Martin81

      LOVE his comment that “the conservative movement is all about being yourself and being an individual.” Yeah, but only so long as you’re not feminine and are “straight-acting” and “normal.” Come on, Matt — your lisp puts mine to SHAME, and I’m FLAMING! Stop the self-hate!

      Feb 12, 2011 at 12:34 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Who Cares?
      Who Cares?

      what a loser!

      Feb 12, 2011 at 12:41 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • SouthSideShorty
      SouthSideShorty

      Ol’ Matt’s just telling it like it is. Some gay men are effeminate, sure, but others are so over-the-top about their womanly manner that it’s an embarrassment to claim them as being of the same demographic, and we have no choice but to distance ourselves from them.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 12:41 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • justiceontherocks
      justiceontherocks

      This flaming queen Hissey doesn’t like effeminate guys?? You couldn’t write comedy better than that.

      That’s carrying self-loathing to an unprecedented level. But what can you expect from someone who hates his mother so much he compares her to Sarah Palin?

      Feb 12, 2011 at 12:42 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • bobby
      bobby

      @martin81,

      That is his point. he has a lisp and he is not trying to hide it. He is talking how he talks and acting how he acts. Not to defend his remark, But he says “The act” and we have all seen this at bars. the guy who is standing there in his T-shirt, Jeans, and Boots. Then when a song comes on or the mouth opens a purse falls out. OWN YOUR SHIT. if you have a lisp, a swish, or what ever own that shit, and DO YOU.

      The whole term “Straight-Acting” frustrates me as well. It’s not an act, I’m not acting as if I am straight. I am gay, and proud to be gay. but I happen to be masculine. It’s not an act that I’m putting on in public then when no one is around the lisp comes out. Stop using that term. it’s a divider for our community.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 12:46 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • :)
      :)

      “Like stereotypical gays like frustrate me” -a stereotypical gay man

      Feb 12, 2011 at 12:47 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • :)
      :)

      How do you know you when your at a gay conservative party? They have a loud music, a spinning video effects projector and just four guys standing in the middle of the dancefloor talking to each other.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 12:52 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TheRealAdam
      TheRealAdam

      @bobby: Well, basically he is just saying what the collective gay community, regardless of politics, always say: that they dislike feminine-acting gays. This isn’t a partisan issue.

      You are telling gays to “own their shit” (what the hell does that mean?) while simultaneously showing contempt for them being themselves. If a guy is in a t-shirt, jeans, and boots, and happens to be feminine, who are you to tell him he’s not “owning his shit?”

      And I by telling the world how masculine you are, you basically create the inequalities you see as “dividers.” Maybe you should work on your own attitude and perspective.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 12:57 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • thedarkchariot
      thedarkchariot

      Let’s assume that feminine gays – swishy, flaming gays – are putting on an act. Even then, what’s wrong with that? It’s the association of femininity, the hate for sissys, not “gays” or “homosexuality”, that starts really early on in childhood, that is being channeled here.

      Matt, you have issues you need to face.

      And btw, was Margaret Hoover saying she was for or against gay marriage? Becuz she said she likes “traditional marriage” but then said she was for marriage equality. I’d be very flattered if she were saying that gay marriage is traditional marriage, but the hyperguilty way she was saying it leads me to believe otherwise.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 1:03 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Shannon1981
      Shannon1981

      LOL what a joke. This nellie motherfucker saying he doesn’t like femme men? PLEASE. Guess he doesn’t like himself either. Not surprised though. GOProud is hardly a truly pro gay organization. It just happens to be run by gay people. Problem is, those gay people don’t seem to like being gay.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 1:05 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • bobby
      bobby

      @TheRealAdam

      yeah, I’m masculine, not straight acting. I am into some topics that the general public would consider not “masculine” and I don’t care if you/they approve of it or not. I’d rather go shopping then play Football. I am who I am and I DGAF if you approve of it or not. I own who I am and what I am into.

      own your shit = be your self, be true to who you are. Don’t stand around and model in your bear/twink/homothug drag if that isn’t you. If you’re fem be fem, don’t try to masc/butch it up to fit it, or stand out, or be more appealing.

      He is not saying he doesn’t like fem guys. If you listen he is saying that he doesn’t like guys who are fem, but try to act butch/masc then are really fem. He is a tad fem. he doesn’t hide in in his voice or mannerisms in the interview.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 1:23 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Lawrence
      Lawrence

      @bobby:

      Yes queens should only dress like queens, so we can tell them apart from the real men…amiright?

      But I cant understand for the life of me who the fuck cares if you dress “manly” but then have effeminate mannerisms. Let people dress/act how they want, let them be themselves…

      Feb 12, 2011 at 1:24 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • tjr101
      tjr101

      Oh the irony, an effeminate gay frustrated by other effeminate gays! That’s the stereotypical gay conservative for you, they can see everything else except what’s in the mirror.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 1:25 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • BeachBuddy
      BeachBuddy

      Sad but true that nellie guys resent us gay men who aren’t swishing around town in a dress. This Matt cat isn’t a self-hater, he’s an honest guy who states his beliefs, consequences be damned. Sounds to me like his detractors are the real haters here.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 1:40 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TheRealAdam
      TheRealAdam

      @Lawrence: Exactly my point. This “Bobby” person obviously has a problem with feminine gay men, and his own desire to not be perceived as feminine. It’s very sad. He has a complex and needs to work on himself and his self-esteem.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 1:41 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • bobby
      bobby

      @lawrence

      allow me to copy and paste. so you can reread: “Don’t stand around and model in your bear/twink/homothug drag if that isn’t you. If you’re fem be fem, don’t try to masc/butch it up to fit it, or stand out, or be more appealing.”

      and let me dumb this down so you can understand. people need to stop with the costumes because they think it will attract guys. Dress in which you like. If you like wearing Wesco’s then wear them, but if you are wearing them because you think they are projecting a masculine image, dont. Stop with the gay sub-category uniforms.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 1:43 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • bobby
      bobby

      @TheRealAdam

      you’re a moron. I have fem friends. I have masculine friends. I could give a fuck how you act as long as you are a solid person. I will read your ass as quick as any one.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 1:47 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      @Lawrence:@tjr101: Agreed!!!

      What an idiot. Anyone who is a fan of Sarah Palin is an idiot. She’s been caught in so many lies and shown to be stupid and yet these people will follow her anywhere. She’s like a Svengali. On top of insulting effeminate gay men and trying to CONTROL how they should look and act, he insults educated people. Harvard, yuck, what good representative can come out there?

      He is an IDIOT!!!

      Feb 12, 2011 at 1:50 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Francis
      Francis

      How can anyone say he IS NOT saying he doesn’t like fem guys? He completely says that straight-ACTING (hypocrisy right there) men are “normal”. He says he “doesn’t like” stereotypical gay men, ie. feminine/flamer gays. When the whole point is that being straight ACTING is an ACT. People like HIM are MANUFACTURED as much as the people he condemns, and more so. Also, there is definitely a divide between masculine gay men are feminine gay men, when there shouldn’t be. The thing is that, at the end of the day, we are all gay. That’s what this kid needs to realize, while he says he doesn’t like gay people or feel apart of the gay community, he is gay, as gay as any other gay. As Bobby put it, stop with the acting, on all fronts. Stop with the division. People like this tragic kid create distinctions, unknowingly, because he isn’t secure in his identity and needs to lash out at others. He doesn’t realize that just as some gay men are very masculine in appearance, others are Johnny Weir. He’s backwards, but so is a lot of the gay community. But, it’s not a surprise, as the anti-gay conditions in society have fucked so many people up mentally.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 1:56 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • adman
      adman

      What’s really tragic to me is the younger demographic involved in politics taking on the old red herrings while falling for the mono-cultural premises that are as founded in lies and deceit as they ever were. Judge another to get a pass, that makes you a lover of liberty? Really? It looks more like someone who can’t think for themselves or practice any kind of measured analysis covering themselves by warning the rest of us to “Be careful, a popularity contest might break out, and I’ll throw you to the mob”. Cowards are very often gay, and privilege can’t give them any cover as it doesn’t work for straights either. Not to anyone who’s paying attention. Fiscal hawk? Are you sure? So you’d like a rational and open discussion on the defense budget huh? Fuck repukes, they are living in a dream world. All of them, down to the last one.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 1:58 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • adman
      adman

      What’s really tragic to me is the younger demographic involved in politics taking on the old red herrings while falling for the mono-cultural premises that are as founded in lies and deceit as they ever were. Judge another to get a pass, that makes you a lover of liberty? Really? It looks more like someone who can’t think for themselves or practice any kind of measured analysis covering themselves by warning the rest of us to “Be careful, a popularity contest might break out, and I’ll throw you to the mob”. Cowards can very often can be gay, and privilege can’t give them any cover as it doesn’t work for straights either. Not to anyone who’s paying attention. Fiscal hawk? Are you sure? So you’d like a rational and open discussion on the defense budget huh? Fuck repukes, they are living in a dream world. All of them, down to the last one.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 1:59 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • adman
      adman

      What’s really tragic to me is the younger demographic involved in politics taking on the old red herrings while falling for the mono-cultural premises that are as founded in lies and deceit as they ever were. Judge another to get a pass, that makes you a lover of liberty? Really? It looks more like someone who can’t think for themselves or practice any kind of measured analysis covering themselves by warning the rest of us to “Be careful, a popularity contest might break out, and I’ll throw you to the mob”. Cowards can very often can be gay, and privilege can’t give them any cover as it doesn’t work for straights either. Not to anyone who’s paying attention. Fiscal hawk? Are you sure? So you’d like a rational and open discussion on the defense budget huh? Fuck repukes, they are living in a dream world. All of them, down to the last one.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 1:59 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Francis
      Francis

      His idol is Sarah Palin. That says it all. His mom was like Sarah Palin. Well, we already know Willow is a fan of the word faggot. He’s a product of his environment. Again I’ll say, he says that some men are normal, straight acting. What that means is simple. He’s the type who lives to blend in, and only likes gay people who do the same. Who “act” stereotypically straight. He connects effeminacy with homosexuality, when many straight men are effeminate acting. He says conservatism is about being yourself and being an individual, but he’s totally repressed and a cardboard box of what his parents molded. He says the conservative party is a big tent party, yet they go out of their way to condemn gay people.

      This guy is what happens when you’re young, stupid, and desperate for approval. Saying gay men who are more fem or flamboyant dislike masculine gays is such a wide brush to paint. The truth is there is a lack of trust on both sides, and a lack of comradery. There isn’t any togetherness. Too clickish and high school. And too much thinking that ___________ is how a gay person is “supposed” to be. Instead of just being yourself. And not making your sexuality be your only calling card.

      Being 21, I think it’s really sad that so many gay men that I should be able to look up to, are more immature behaving than gay AND straight men in my generation. And it’s sad that this kid is a victim of homophobia as many in the gay community are.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 2:09 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TheRealAdam
      TheRealAdam

      @bobby: You just can’t handle that you are contradicting yourself. You tell people to dress how they like (post #17) and yet you (post #6) tell feminine gay men that they CAN’T dress how they like. So which is it going to be?

      And you’re going to read me? Oh, really? Come on and do it then, whore. Show me your flopped reads and failed shade.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 2:11 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Kev C
      Kev C

      I dislike stereotypical gays too. Wheeeeeeeeee, look at me! I’m sooo traditional!

      Feb 12, 2011 at 2:14 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Luxury
      Luxury

      The term “straight-acting” in-FUCKING-furiates me!!!! That’s about all I can muster at this point….
      We are our own WORST enemy way more often then I’d like to admit.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 2:24 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • justiceontherocks
      justiceontherocks

      @scott ny’er: Well, he is fond of Teddy Roosevelt, who graduated from . . . Harvard!!!

      Feb 12, 2011 at 2:39 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • ron
      ron

      I feel the same way. I’m a successful tall handsome masculine gay man. Women want me and men want to be like me. I can’t stand 99% of the other gays out there. Out of shape, queeny, dumb and drugged out losers are the norm among liberal fags.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 2:41 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TheRealAdam
      TheRealAdam

      @ron: Wow.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 2:45 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Francis
      Francis

      That was a good trolling attempt, Ron. Actually, it wasn’t. But I did laugh at you so I guess it wasn’t a total fail.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 2:48 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • justiceontherocks
      justiceontherocks

      @ron: I’m willing to bet that your voice is higher than Miss Hissey’s, and that the only female who can stand to be around you is your mother, since your cat already gave up on you.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 2:52 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • thematics
      thematics

      The Republican party seems to have strayed from its roots. Fiscal conservatism has been left on the side of the road, and social conservatism has turned into social “regressivism,” trying to steer the US back to the 1950s, (like when rights of LGB people and minorities didn’t exist! Women stayed at home! We won wars!)

      I believe that these GOProud gays are trying to change themselves to adapt to the Party, and not doing anything that benefits other LGB people.

      Even socially moderate Rebublicans like Olympia Snow risk getting tossed from the GOP bus now that the Tea Partyists are challenging their positions.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 2:59 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • McMike
      McMike

      The most effeminate guy in this video is going to say he doesn’t like effeminate guys? Wow.

      “Like, you know, I really hate fem guys.”

      What’s classic is his arms are flailing all in the air when he says this.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 3:01 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Francis
      Francis

      Matt Hissey quotes:

      “You don’t need to follow the liberal bandwagon just because you’re gay.”

      “The tea party may be against gay marriage, but that’s OK, because I am too.”

      “Skin color diversity—-that’s not real diversity.”

      “I don’t feel apart of any so-called gay community.”

      “America should be about small government control and conservative fiscal policies braided with social harmony.” (translation: as long as I can keep my money *snark*, gay rights are secondary, and the fact most tea partiers hate me is irrelevant).

      The kid is fucked up.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 3:11 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Seriously?
      Seriously?

      I have to say, I love how most of the comments responding to this guy are talking about how he is SO effeminate, has a lisp and is obviously gay. You’re just showing as much as internalized homophobia as he did, except his was more publicized and not anonymous.

      Grow up, people.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 3:13 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • greenmanTN
      greenmanTN

      Who is this guy, or anyone for that matter, to say who is or who isn’t being “authentic”? How can you claim to stand for individualism while at the same time have strict rules about the “right” way for people to express themselves? I mean here’s this guy whose speech and diction is strictly valley-girl uptalk, WAY up there on the list of “Things That Make People Not Take You Seriously,” and he’s lecturing people about how to present themselves? And let’s face it, the Republican party has a higher than average percentage of clinical sociopaths in their ranks so let’s not get too carried away pointing fingers at people who are putting on an act.

      Look, I get what he’s saying because I’ve heard it a thousand times before. We’ve all seen guys go from Macho Man to Miss Thing in the process of coming out. But who’s to say which one is “real” and what’s it to you anyway? It’s their life, not yours, and people want to fit in so sometimes they model what they’ve seen in the media, what they think is expected. With many it’s a passing phase, something they go through before finding their place. And in every person, from this guy’s suit and tie get-up, to grunge, label mongering, drag, leather, or jeans and tees there’s an element of performance, deliberate decisions about how you want others to perceive you.

      And I’ve got news for this guy. He can dress up every day in his finest best-little-boy-in-the-world clothes and yell “but I’m not like them!” at the top of his lungs and the people at CPAC and other, similar groups STILL aren’t going to like him because he’s a fag. The best he’s ever going to get is a reputation as “one of the good ones,” the Stepin’ Fetchit role in their farce of “diversity,” his most admired quality that he’s not one of the uppity ones who demand their rights.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 3:17 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Seriously?
      Seriously?

      @ Bobby

      Who are you to identify yourself as ‘masculine’ and what right do you have to say you have ‘fem friends’? What kind of fucked up shit is that? You sir, need just as much help as Matt Hissey does.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 3:18 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Owen
      Owen

      @Seriously?: No, they’re pointing out hypocrisy.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 3:40 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Dali
      Dali

      “since T.R in like, 1913″…ummmm…I’m quite sure Theodore Roosevelt was not President in 1913. I know that and I’m not even American. Republicans are pathetic! Please, my friends, don’t make that mistake again in 2012.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 4:18 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • justiceontherocks
      justiceontherocks

      @Dali: You are correct. Teddy ran in 1912 as the standard bearer of the Bull Moose Party.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 4:32 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Josh in OR
      Josh in OR

      This is what happens when you mix gay people with Republicans. You get gay people with such an under-developed sense of irony that they can say things like ‘I just really don’t like gay people’ or ‘being conservative is all about being yourself and not pretending’ while completely unaware of the purse falling out of his mouth (to borrow a metaphor) with every word he speaks. That kid has been so crammed and broken to fit into the Rethuglican’t mold that he has no idea how insanely self-loathing he is.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 4:46 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Shannon1981
      Shannon1981

      @Josh in OR: Well put. Queers and Republicans are like oil and water. A gay man who opposes gay marriage? WTF? Who supports the tea party and doesn’t like gays? How does that even make any sense?

      Feb 12, 2011 at 5:04 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Luxury
      Luxury

      @Owen: “@Seriously?: No, they’re pointing out hypocrisy.”

      BINGO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      Feb 12, 2011 at 5:19 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Seriously?
      Seriously?

      @Owen

      Yes, they’re pointing out the hypocrisy, but it’s the way that some chose to do it that makes them a hypocrite. Nellies, purses falling out of their mouths, arms flailing? That’s just as hateful as the things he’s saying. Exposing a wrong doesn’t make you right.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 5:33 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • christopher di spirito
      christopher di spirito

      “Matt Hissey?” HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

      Perfect!

      Feb 12, 2011 at 5:53 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • justiceontherocks
      justiceontherocks

      @Seriously?: It’s perfectly fair to point out that this guy is exactly the sort of stereotype he claims to hate.

      Hissey is a delusional soul who needs to be slapped in the face with reality. The posts on here are providing something he needs.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 6:41 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Francis
      Francis

      I just looked at this video and had another laugh. It’s so sad and honestly, it’s not funny in general, but it’s also so stupid it’s something you can’t help but chuckle at. He doesn’t like gay people, doesn’t feel apart of the gay community and he says he “understands” some gay people are fem, yet he’s fem as heck and he’s as gay as the gay people he’s condemning. This kid with the pursed lips, tongue snap, the head shake, the hands, the hair frosting, the “um….like” valley girl speech is condemning fem/more flamboyant gay men for being who they are, and saying they are putting on an act. And judges the entire gay community based on these ignorant stereotypes and offensive judgments. All the while he searches for straight ACTing men on Manhunt. And I understand where you are coming from Seriously?, one can point out his hypocrisy without being offensive. But ultimately, that is what everyone is doing, pointing out hypocrisy. This kid is so shockingly deluded. I’ve rarely seen people so unaware before.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 6:45 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TwlightoftheDogs
      TwlightoftheDogs

      Francis

      A lot of these guys are people who have never experienced being different. Hence his comments about diversity. He’s trying to create a reality in which he’s part of the majority that he grew up being told would make him the king of the universe. Unfortunately, there are quite a few gay men like that. They don’t want to associate with anything different because before coming out, if they are out, it was a place of power. This is mostly amongst gay white men from typically middle class to wealthy backgrounds. But not always. The key element is the desire at all cost to be seen as a part of the dominant power structure at all cost. Hell, you can see that in the greater gay community as far as activism goes. Its is no mistake that although blacks and Latinos make up the bulk of gays with children in the South and in places like NYC- the images you see are those of white suburban “normal” couples. That’s because that’s how deep the need to fit in goes. By the way, I say this as someone who wants kids, etc. The difference is that I worked out out of baggage first before inflicting any kids with the crap society dumped on me. So, now, my partner and I can have kids without my baggage.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 7:00 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      HIssey should see “Milk”. He might learn something. Well, HIssey does seem really stupid so it’s asking a lot, but I have hope that something might get through.

      I hope all gay repubs have more sense than this idiot but I’m not so sure.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 7:01 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Andy
      Andy

      Holy Christ? Are you serious?? HAHA… That Matt guy is as stereotypically gay as they come.

      I’m a masculine guy, I don’t like women and most gay men for the same reason. But I’d rather be around “stereotypically gay” men who aren’t self-loathing.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 7:25 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Francis
      Francis

      Thank you Twilightofthedogs. You really put things into perspective, much more clear for me to see. I respect the fact you worked everything out with yourself and realized that there were things you needed to get a handle of before having the responsibility of having a kid. I guess the need to fit in and for approval is why you see a lot of gay men throwing out there how they’re “masculine” or “fem” or whatever else, rather that just saying “I’m gay”, instead of creating these definitions of who and what they are? I don’t know. I’ve never felt any real drive to compromise who I am to fit in, so all of this sort of hits really deep for me, I guess makes me sad to see people internally struggling. I totally can understand it, though, how people like this Hissey kid or others grow up believing that how there is only one true way to be and live, how a kid who is white and middle/upper class alone makes them better than others with more self-worth, and then coming to the realization you’re gay, not wanting to give that up and lashing out at anything and anyone who threatens that. I guess I’m sort of innocent to realities of the world and how it works.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 8:11 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Ehrenstein
      David Ehrenstein

      @Luxury: The term “straighht-actinmg” clearly indicates that “straight” is an act. The only real gay people are. . . .gay.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 8:22 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TwlightoftheDogs
      TwlightoftheDogs

      Its easy to internalize the things that society throws as you. It takes a lot to find the strength to just be yourself no matter what. Whatever that self is.

      The irony of this kid is that he’s talking about individuality, but has no idea what that means.

      I feel sorry for him. True individuality is where you start to accept yourself as yourself and don’t begrudge others for being themselves so long as neither harms anyone else.

      Feb 12, 2011 at 9:08 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jonathan
      Jonathan

      @justiceontherocks: Thank you! That’s the hardest I’ve laughed in days. Very funny!

      Feb 12, 2011 at 11:00 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jeffree
      Jeffree

      Based on The Hissey, I’m willing to say maybe reparative therapy isn’t such an awful idea. I don’t want him batting or catching for *our* team ! Or catching flyballs…..

      OK, not really—but how does he sleep with himself at night, knowing that he’s a sell out, and the butt of jokes and the source of shame for the CPACkers —-AND the gays?
      Wake up, Matt. This isn’t a dress rehearsal, it’s your life,.

      @twilightofthedogs: You said it all. Your children will be lucky to have you as a parent.

      @scott ny’er: Yes, he should see Milk. And read up on LGBT history. I bet he thinks Stonewall is a Pink Floyd album !

      Feb 13, 2011 at 12:18 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Dont Take The Bait
      Dont Take The Bait

      Has anyone read about Old Crusty Coulter bragging at CPAC that she got GOProud to “drop the marriage plank”?

      These guys are more loyal to political copy than to real human rights, let alone individual freedom. They put their bigoted and mendacious party first, even before their dignity as individual human beings, let alone as vital gay people.

      Their continued support for Coulter is just the tip of the ice-berg, and the barest evidence of what dishonor they do to the cause of gay rights. I mean, now that GOProud has brought Andrew Breitbart onto their board, I think people in the community ought to be very careful.

      Breitbart has already attempted numerous attacks on the gay rights movement, as well as on gay individuals. He has deliberately cultivated homophobia in his following for the sake of political smearing.

      Since Breitbarts proteges James Okeefe, Ben Wetmore and Joe Basel already have attempted to sabatogue the struggle for marriage equality by pretending to be gay (dont know how many of you know about those failed stunts), I am sure Breitbart will use his GOProud contacts to attempt the same. Since GOProud can submit themselves to Coulters outragous and dehumanizing demands, I am sure they would be just as happy to sell out the whole matter of LGBT rights at Breitbarts behest.

      But returning to the subject of Ice Queen Ann and her pathetic reign over the GOProud ninnies…, one has to wonder about her claims in counseling her GOProud fans.

      I mean, if Ann Coulter got GOProud to renounce marrigae equality, and if she actively encourages them to practice celibacy (another brag of hers at CPAC), then isnt she basically making them her own little experiment in conversion therapy?

      These people are foolish, naive, uninformed and entirely irresponsible.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 3:13 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • ewe
      ewe

      what kind ochildhood bullying did he go through with the surname of Hissey?

      Feb 13, 2011 at 3:57 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Brown Gay Al
      Brown Gay Al

      @TwlightoftheDogs: Sorry but DL men having kids to prove their manhood and then coming out later in life having fucked up their children’s lives who then raise them with their boyfriends are not good examples of gay parents. they are good examples of confused parents.

      As for this kid he is only saying what others put on their manhunt profiles. He just has the guts to say it.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 5:22 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • McMike
      McMike

      @Seriously?: You could not be further off-base. Most of us are pointing out the hypocrisy of this guy. I have absolutely no problem with how any gay guy acts but I do have a problem with a fem guy saying how much he hates fem guys.

      Get a clue and figure out the difference between internalized homophobia and people pointing out hypocrisy.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 6:56 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • McMike
      McMike

      @Andy: Sure you are Andy. It cracks me up when gay men want to profess how masculine they are but you can spot them being gay a mile away. Whenever you go online the “straight acting for straight acting” guys are ALWAYS the stereotypical gay gym bunny who is the ONLY one who doesn’t think he acts totally gay.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 7:01 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TO
      TO

      I do not agree with GOProud’s point of view but, is no one on duty over there? Is no one looking after PR strategy? First of all you let the twink talk to the media, which if you paid attention in gay 101 instead of wasting time hating yourselves, you would know to never do that ever. I love that he endorses Sarah Palin which is not good for any republican wanting to appeal to the majority and then he marginalizes, offends and alienates part of your potential core audience. Let’s not even talk about how no one would say anything about endorsing a potential candidate. I know you guys are fat on the inside but it turns out your just dumb. Stop wasting our time.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 12:11 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TwlightoftheDogs
      TwlightoftheDogs

      Brown- you have no way of knowing whether what you say is true or not. There have been no studies or research and you can’t link us to any. Its literally something you made up. The fact you made it up illustrates what I mean. Someone must always be down below you so that you can feel superior. This is about maintaining status that some of you felt like you lost.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 12:24 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Dont Take The Bait
      Dont Take The Bait

      Personally, I have grown SO SICK of people like this disgusting little Hissey turnip (or any dork who bothers to call himself “Straight Acting/Appearing”), knocking so hard at what they call “stereotypical” gay people.

      I LOVE big flaming queens and bold brassy dykes. I honestly do!

      I am not saying that everyone in the community is, or has to be like them…, i just love them as people.

      And generally speaking, my experience has been that many people who might fit that description number among some of the most beautiful souls on the planet.

      They usually just make me happy.
      And you know why?

      Because as an older gay man, I know that it was the fierce flammers and duck-tail dykes that stood out and MADE the rest of the world acknowledge us.

      Many of us lived (and still live) through the experience of widespread homophobia, and so-called “stereotypical” gays have always been at the forefront of visibility, even at great risk to themselves.

      Those of you who lived through such experiences know exactly what i mean, and those of you who did not ought to feel some sincere appreciation.

      Whatever you might think of them , if you are older than 30, you KNOW that those so called “stereotypical gay” folks have, for decades, taken the punches for the rest of us… literally. We owe them big time, and I consider them heros of a sort.

      I know I am gushing, but its what i honestly feel.

      It wasnt a sniveling little paper-thin, brown-nosing bar-fly like this mincing GOProud Hissey fitter that started Stone Wall, it was a cross-dressing Dyke and a bunch of drag queens.

      Hell, an openly gay “queen” mentored Doctor King in the process of non-violent non-cooperation, and actually organized the real March on Washington (Bayard Rustin… remember, and be glad there is such a thing as queer history!)

      I generally have no issue with people voting however they feel,right or left, but GOProud is entirely disingenuoous, and far to willing to undo the progress in LGBT rights that has even made their sad little collective possible.

      Screw GOProud, and whatever grovelling little twink moron that might speak for them.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 1:20 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • MikeE
      MikeE

      @64 Don’t Take The Bait

      beautifully put.

      too many people have had it easy, taking what liberties they have for granted and forgetting who exactly fought tooth and nail to gain the little gains we got.

      homosexuality is no longer criminal in most parts of the civilized world not because of the “Straight acting” guys, but because of the queens and bulldykes.

      Stonewall Inn was full of drag queens the night of “the riots”… THEY are the ones who threw rocks and bricks at the cops and chanted “enough is enough”.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 1:47 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Palto
      Palto

      @ron:

      It’s amazing how one can tell what an absolute dick a person is from only two and a half lines. Ron go back to kissing the mirror you stuck-up little shit.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 1:57 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • ewe
      ewe

      @Brown Gay Al: Oh please go on with your labeling of gay people.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 2:16 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Wyatt
      Wyatt

      I can sympathize with him, but rather than holding a negative stance against gays, I simply choose to not care. It’s very easy to avoid those types of people, and there’s no need to take such a radical political stance to help justify your sentiments.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 2:37 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jimmy
      Jimmy

      People are FREE to adopt whatever persona they want or feel they need to get through this life. The trouble lies in people who adopt sociopathic personality traits to get by, and one could find a lot those folks walking around CPAC.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 2:58 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • McMike
      McMike

      @Wyatt: The problem isn’t his so-called stance, but the fact he’s a very effeminate gay man saying he doesn’t like effeminate gay men. It’s beyond hypocritical.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 3:22 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Andy
      Andy

      @McMike: I understand that sentiment. However, I don’t claim to be straight-acting. I’m not a gym bunny either.

      I’ve been to gay bars and guys have asked if I was straight and there with friends. I prefer hanging out with straight guys because I don’t fit in with the effeminacy. Gay men in relationships feel like having a girlfriend. I want someone like me.

      Nothing personal, I just prefer guys more like me and I don’t find that with many gay men.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 3:28 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TwlightoftheDogs
      TwlightoftheDogs

      Andy

      I have dated guys like you. Hell, I used to be a guy like you.

      Its not just that you say you are looking for masculine guys. I can understand that.

      But the idea that you don’t find any within the gay community makes you suspect. When someone makes your kind of declaration the red flags of internalized issues are raised.

      I hang out with enough straight men to know that your whole construction of it must be gay or straight is fantasy. That’s because I grew up in a culture that was big on being the “tough guy” so its a natural part of my personality at this point. Ultimately there is no gay man who will ever be masculine enough for you because the problem is that he’s a man who wants to have sex with you. I don’t expect you to own it. Once I started to own my issues related to this , I tried to point this out to some guys I knew who are gay, and they didn’t own it either. It takes a lot of work to get beyond lying to yourself about exactly why you can never find any guy who is masculine enough in the gay community.

      By the way, before you deny what I said, let me just say you basically tell us that what I am describing is exactly what you are. This statement by you sums up language I have heard before:

      “Gay men in relationships feel like having a girlfriend. ”

      If by “girlfriend” you mean emotions and wanting a relationship in which you must commit yourself to something other than getting your dick wet then it probably is something that will never feel natural for you.

      Has it ever occurred to you that the statement represents not what is wrong with the men you are meeting, but what are your feelings about being gay? No man is every going to be “masculine” enough for you because ultimately the problem is that you hate the fact you like men.

      The weird way that comes out with guys like you is that you become obsessed with finding something that doesn’t even exist amongst straight men. So, the idea that you want it from gay men is laughable if it weren’t so sad and ultimately harmful to yourself and the guys you date.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 3:53 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • natural conservative
      natural conservative

      Video of more gay guys at CPAC 2011:

      Feb 13, 2011 at 3:58 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TwlightoftheDogs
      TwlightoftheDogs

      Andy

      A follow up: to give you an idea of why I suspect its you rather than the men you are meeting, let me add that I am the type of guy who women will assume is straight and have had women with whom I developed friendships become mad because they thought there was something romantic involved in our hanging out when I told them that I am gay. As one of the women put it- you aren’t clockable. Which means I don’t fit the stereotypes or ways that she and others can tell that I am gay. I am a geek. I love hard rock. I grew up fighting with the other boys, playing sports, and doing boy things. Etc. I enjoyed it. Its just natural to me. That being said- I realize that the issue I was having with other gay men was not about them being masculine or not. It was about my comfort with having sex with men. Once I dealt with that baggage, I started to have healthier relationships and suddenly other men’s masculinity didn’t quite seem to matter as much.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 4:01 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jeffree
      Jeffree

      @Andy: Don’t be so sure there aren’t a ++lot++ of gay men out there who won’t automatically “ping” your gaydar.

      If I had a quarter for every time someone told me they “couldn’t tell” I was gay, well I wouldnt be working three jobs to afford college ! It’s not an act, it’s how I am.

      No matter what, I’ve never identified as “straight”, “straight-acting,” or “masculine”. I’m not “butch” like my dad is, I’m not good at “manly” things; he can rebuild engines, work a barbeque and play rugby. But he cries at movies, can make a mean plate of bruschetta, & gives great advice when I’m down.

      I have plenty of friends who may *appear* to be more “effeminate” and I know they’re just being who they are. When someone is comfortable in their own skin, it’s attractive. When they’re putting on an act it’s not. I don’t want them to be who theyre not, and they accept me for being who I am.

      I happened to find two of my last three bfs while NOT looking in the usual places like a bar or online. I met one waiting on line for coffee .The one I’m with now for three years was running the sound for a comedy gig I had. He’s Swiss-Canadian, and we’ve been together for almost 4 yrs. I’m glad he found me. I sure wouldn’t have gone after him, because I didn’t know he was gay!

      Keep your eyes, ears and heart open.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 4:27 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Oli
      Oli

      I wish people would think more about gender. I feel sorry for that kid though, he’s just a product of all the bullshit a person learns throughout childhood (and beyond). I don’t think there’s much point congratulating ourselves for not thinking like him. He’s just a sorry reflection of what people think about sexuality and gender, desperately trying to fit in. His views are pretty damn annoying though.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 4:34 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jeffree
      Jeffree

      @Twighlightofthedogs: Our comments crossed paths, but yes, yes, you’re so right about needing to be comfortable with oneself being gay before getting into relationships. The guys who are still struggling with being gay always seem to be waaaay more work than they’re with. Some of them grow out of it, but it seems many don’t.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 4:48 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Leroy Laflamme
      Leroy Laflamme

      Reading these comments (& the ones at http://www.towleroad.com, I wonder if the deluded young man in question ever visits these blogs himself, & if so, how he feels about the overwhelming negative response to his bigoted, thoughtless comments. Perhaps something I ate for lunch is disagreeing with me, but there’s something about his shrill, big-yapped, jazz-hands demeanour that makes me want to slap his squirrel-toothed ferret face. Like I sometimes want to slap Perez Hilton.

      So, to young Ms(ter) Hissey, if you are reading this, wake up & smell the coffee, missy. Perhaps you’ve never seen yourself on camera, but the fact is, you present just like one of those stereotypical gays who so frustrate you. If I may quote from legally Blonde The Musical: “You ARE so gay, you big parfait, you flaming one-man cabaret!”

      Feb 13, 2011 at 4:53 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Andy
      Andy

      @TwlightoftheDogs: “Has it ever occurred to you that the statement represents not what is wrong with the men you are meeting, but what are your feelings about being gay? No man is every going to be “masculine” enough for you because ultimately the problem is that you hate the fact you like men.”

      Yeah, this is how I know I’m not for the gay world. To me, straight men are *less* masculine than men like me: they put up with women, oftentimes men are their bitches. Yes dear this, yes honey that. I am attracted to women but such a relationship could never work out because I’m not okay in a relationship where my role is basically to be a male lesbian who caters to a woman’s need.

      “If by “girlfriend” you mean emotions and wanting a relationship in which you must commit yourself to something other than getting your dick wet then it probably is something that will never feel natural for you.”

      Here too. Women and gay men are unable to imagine any relationship structure that’s different from “fuck buddy” and “real relationship (with emotions etc).”

      I want a brotherly, masculine dynamic with someone who is similar to me. I want a relationship where I can just chill the fuck out, maybe have a fuck with a friend I respect for more than just sex. I don’t see that in the hetero or gay world, sadly.

      “Its just natural to me. That being said- I realize that the issue I was having with other gay men was not about them being masculine or not. It was about my comfort with having sex with men.”

      To me, it’s about my lack of compatibility with femininity. I don’t like being around women/gay men because we have so little in common. It’s simply boring for both parties. So it’s not about the sex itself.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 5:09 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Francis
      Francis

      You sound really hardened, Andy. I don’t consider myself masculine or feminine or anything than just me being me, but I have a friend like what it seems you want. We hang out and watch sports, we can just stay inside or we can go out and work out, we can go out at night or whatever, no pressure, just two guys having fun, we’ve had sex, it’s all cool. With that said, I do love him, and he loves me, we click, we talk about things, he doesn’t even identify as gay, we just enjoy each others’ company on a deep level. It’s like you think having emotions for a person or being vulnerable at all or whatever is weak. You seem self-absorbed a little bit. I’m not great at explaining things like this but I think you need to take the shackles off yourself a bit. It’s like nothing or no-one will be enough for you.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 6:09 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TwlightoftheDogs
      TwlightoftheDogs

      Andy

      Here’s the deal- As I have said . I have dated guys like you, which made me in part start to check my own baggage.

      You aren’t describing all or even most gay men. You are describing a stereotype that is out there, but is not nearly the entire spectrum

      The fact you keep saying that its a large number of gay men is the fact that makes me think you are uncomfortable with yourself. Its too much projection onto others. Not enough “why am I seeing all this in others rather than myself?”

      Sorry, I don’t buy that you can’t find anyone who is masculine enough. I think its more likely the problem is you. I once dated a guy, the last one that I dated like this, who kept harping on the idea that gay men talk about sex too much. I went home, and thought about our last date, before i dumped him. Here’s the reality- straight men- the entire culture for the most part- is about straight men having sex with women. I have a straight friend who goes to strip clubs each week. I have another who sends me multiple texts about his sexual conquests. The problem with the guy I dated was not that gay man talked to much about sex compared to straight men. It was that he was uncomfortable with sex with men.

      As for the rest of the post, you aren’t interested in a relationship with humans. You want with your fantasy. Its not the fact that they are gay that’s the problem. I once dated a guy who said similar shit. It was really about him being selfish and wanting what he wanted. Which is fine- but stop blaming others for what you want and the fact that’s not what they want. They aren’t required to deal with your lack of comfort inside yourself

      You honestly don’t see it. You think its about them. The problems you are discussing. But the problem is you.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 6:17 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • hf2hvit
      hf2hvit

      @SouthSideShorty: Some people wouldn’t like you just because you’re either short or IT is short…or your creepy attitude

      Feb 13, 2011 at 7:20 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TheRealAdam
      TheRealAdam

      @Andy: You need to work on yourself before you even think of critiquing the whole of gay society. All I read is “I want this, I want that, this doesn’t please me, so all of X is all of Z, and I reject it all.”

      It’s a shame that anyone – gay, straight, etc. – thinks the way you do. Usually it comes from people who haven’t grown up and have their own issues that they haven’t worked out.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 7:37 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Andy
      Andy

      The worst part is that I probably won’t ever find anyone precisely because of these supremacist beliefs, that if you don’t accept gay is the only legitimate form of same-sex relationship you’re somehow damaged.

      There are lots of guys like me, but they’re “straight” or “bicurious” or “down low” or whatever. But they’re not really out and don’t really want to be. Why? Well, any time a masculine guy stands up and says this gay thing isn’t for him, he gets accused of not accepting himself and that he has an issue.

      Unlike g0y or that guy who wrote Androphilia, I don’t have a problem with gays and don’t rag on them. I hate CPAC and these sort of clowns. You’re born effeminate, great. Marriage equality? Great! Full rights, great. But when it comes to reciprocating anything, gay men just tell me I have problems. Fuck that.

      I long for the day I can just blow my brains out and not cling on to the notion that there’s more to this world than only the Walt Disney heteronormative relationships, whether they involve two dick or a dick and a pussy.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 7:52 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Kieran
      Kieran

      Poor Matt Hissey. Only 22 years old and already hated by millions of outraged homophobes because he’s honest about being gay, and now also hated by millions of outraged gays because he’s honest about not being attracted to femme men. Can we atleast give the kid a few points for being boldly honest?

      Feb 13, 2011 at 7:55 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Andy
      Andy

      The worst part is that I probably won’t ever find anyone precisely because of these supremacist beliefs, that if you don’t accept gay is the only legitimate form of same-sex relationship you’re somehow damaged.

      There are lots of guys like me, but they’re “straight” or “bicurious” or “down low” or whatever. But they’re not really out and don’t really want to be. Why? Well, any time a masculine guy stands up and says this gay thing isn’t for him, he gets accused of not accepting himself and that he has an issue.

      Unlike g0y or that guy who wrote Androphilia, I don’t have a problem with gays and don’t rag on them. I hate CPAC and these sort of clowns. You’re born effeminate, great. Marriage equality? Great! Full rights, great. But when it comes to reciprocating anything, gay men just tell me I have problems. Screw that.

      I long for the day I can just blow mybrains out and not cling on to the notion that there’s more to this world than only the Walt Disney heteronormative relationships, whether they involve two dick or a dick and a pussy.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 8:34 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Brendan
      Brendan

      I can tell he’ll be willing to bend over and take it for his Republican overlords. :D

      Feb 13, 2011 at 8:55 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • mark
      mark

      I saw another video of this Party which showed Dan Choi attending, that was disappointing.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 9:20 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Francis
      Francis

      @Kieran: There is a difference between not being attracted to someone as a mate and then rejecting and condemning a group of people as fake and disliking them, and in turn, disliking a whole community, because of how they express themselves in terms of gender, and using stereotypes to judge an entire group in this way. He essentially said men who may be fem or more flamboyant aren’t real or normal. There is no way you can cut slack here. He was honest, but that doesn’t make his views acceptable whatsoever. He says he dislikes gay people and feels no part of the gay community, so what is there to support? A pat on the back is a spit in the face of the fem men out here who actually don’t put on an act, aren’t desperate for approval from conservative straights, and aren’t running around saying gays shouldn’t have marriage or pretending things aren’t what they truly are when it comes to what the tea partiers think of us. I think the kid needs a lot of help and guidance, but approval of his words is not an option.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 9:30 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Logic Girl
      Logic Girl

      Bobby probably hates himself as well.

      In my opinion he has a feminine voice and mannerisms- but SO WHAT? Who cares if someone is a gigantic dyke or a flaming queer. As long as a person is kind, intelligent and creative I’m not bothered at all.

      However, sometimes these stereotypes force men and women into little boxes. I love it when gays can feel comfortable enjoying conflicting activities. Sometimes I’ll admit that it frustrates me when I see gays being labeled as a flaming fag, or a granola lesbian. These labels are not needed or positive.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 10:42 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Patsy Stoned
      Patsy Stoned

      Oh that GOProud crowd continues to parody itself. At least he’s young, and might grow out of whatever internal demons plague him. Kudos to the reporter for not laughing in his face.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 11:09 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jaroslaw
      Jaroslaw

      It has been very interesting to read all the posts but I really MUST protest about this business of “doing boy things and sports and being masculine” because it is natural for ‘the writers above.’

      The ONLY thing I know for sure is some boys seem to be naturally feminine at a very very young age – who is that boy that is just the rage right now? I forget his name – he can’t have a clue what it means to like pink and wear dresses etc. at his young age.

      It is MUCH LATER that we realize what it means to be a man or woman in our culture and what behavior is expected. For example, I wasn’t either swishy or masculine as a child, I was in the middle. But I remember, (or at least it seemed like every day!) my parents would say stand up straight or whatever. This was 3rd grade and everyone knows what it means to be a sissy. I wasn’t, but I consciously tried very hard NOT to be. Again, I wasn’t fighting a great desire to wear heels a dress or make up; I’m not sure that was even an option as a fantasy. But I do know I had to consciously work hard to “be a masculine boy.” Since one has to choose how to talk, walk and what activities to engage in, I fail to see how this would not apply to everyone. Am I being clear? One cannot simply be inert; one must CHOOSE what to do, what clothes to wear, all those things which signal feminine or masculine behavior…..

      Feb 13, 2011 at 11:32 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John
      John

      No one?..

      Hissey fit. :->

      Feb 13, 2011 at 11:38 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • John
      John

      BTW folks.@Jaroslaw: “…some boys seem to be naturally feminine at a very very young age…”

      Yup: “Born This Way” Blog
      http://borngaybornthisway.blogspot.com/

      Feb 13, 2011 at 11:46 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TwlightoftheDogs
      TwlightoftheDogs

      Sure we may have all had very different things that felt natural to us as a kids. That’s cool.

      For me, a rough and tumble childhood of playing sports, and video games etc was something that I enjoyed a great deal. Others may not have felt the same way. To me, there should be as much variation for what it means to be happy and gay as there is for straights.

      The point is that there shouldn’t be a one size fit all for being gay. Gay really has nothing to do with what you were like as a kid or what you are into or want to do now. The only thing that should really tie us together is that we want relationships with people of the same gender.

      Some people are fem and some are in the middle and some are masculine, and at end of the day- it really doesn’t matter so long as it was what the kid wanted to be and we are comfortable in our skins as adults.

      If that’s true, then that’s what counts- at least to me.

      Feb 13, 2011 at 11:54 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Gigi
      Gigi

      @Andy: I’m confused. You’re gay, but you don’t like being around women or gay men. With whom do you have sexual relations? Palmala is nice and she knows what I like but we all need some form of human contact every now and then.

      Feb 14, 2011 at 8:07 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Right Wingers Are Socioptahs (John From England)
      Right Wingers Are Socioptahs (John From England)

      @Gigi:

      He’s making really, really sweeping statements.@Andy:

      Like everyone is saying, you are majorly, majorly generalising. Where have you lived? What cities? What cultures? What countries?

      I’ve have had so many situations in my life where I haven’t fitted in. So what. It was because of the place. So I did what many do when you are searching for like minded souls and travelled, moved about etc. I have friends who live all over the world, we’re all just as bad as each other and never nec felt like the Uk is where we wanted to be, so we did something about it. Simple.

      Yo can’t make such a statement without building up enough evidence based facts to carry your comment. Maybe its because I am knee deep in a post grad course but that wouldn’t fly if you were trying to build an argument as it’s too one sided, knee jerk and personalised.
      @TwlightoftheDogs:

      Good point about Hassell not wanting to seem weak or be with the weaker group, gays. That is really all it is in life. It’s the same with ethnic minorities and I see it all the time. Women too, especially when it comes to trying to help women break the glass ceiling etc.

      It’s one of the biggest reasons people despise affirmative action, especially the right wing conservatives.

      99% of society thrive on being better then you or someone else. Making the world a fairer place really pisses them off.

      When you can blankly judge someone on how they talk, dress and act to determine their wealth or class to make yourself be superior……

      Feb 14, 2011 at 8:48 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Right Wingers Are Socioptahs (John From England)
      Right Wingers Are Socioptahs (John From England)

      If we’re honest though, some gays are really OTT about being camp, like some guys are OTT about being masculine, some women are OTT about being feminine and some black people are OTT about being ‘street’.

      It’s all manufactured concepts that are design through society and learned behaviour. You’re not ‘born’ like that per say. Only certain instincts exist when we are born, like the race and sex you are, but the rest is all picked on early as a child when you see and hear what is around you.

      Feb 14, 2011 at 8:52 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TwlightoftheDogs
      TwlightoftheDogs

      @Right Wingers Are Socioptahs (John From England): @Right Wingers Are Socioptahs (John From England): You can not tell other people what’s natural to them. So, when you say “be honest” the truth is you can’t tell other people that they aren’t being honest just because you don’t like it.

      Feb 14, 2011 at 9:13 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jaroslaw
      Jaroslaw

      #92 I think we agree – I would have enjoyed baseball ( or any sports) a lot more if I was at least passable at it, simply to fit in with the other boys and connect with them. Where we lived, my mother was divorced at one point which was absolutely unheard of and my brother and I kept that a big secret, never speaking of it at school. Possibly if our Dad had spent ANY time with us playing those things we would have been better at them. Stepdad wasn’t any better at that stuff. It just irks me to hear people say things like “he’s all boy” or “I was naturally masculine” – as John from England says most of this stuff is social construct. That is the main point I was trying to make. Glad you were able to fit in and enjoy that stuff but for those of us who weren’t “all boy”, it was torture growing up. Hopefully, the world is becoming a little more inclusive, seems like it might be in some places….

      Feb 14, 2011 at 9:17 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • ousslander
      ousslander

      He said what he said but to get batshit crazy over it is batshit crazy, especially when commenters on this sight regularly make negative comments on posts about ultra swishy people.

      Feb 14, 2011 at 9:31 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Cam
      Cam

      Awwwww, Poor little hissy doesn’t like gay people.

      Well fine, I think that guys wearing imitation Brooks Brothers and deck shoes in an attempt to pretend that it’s 1950 and he’s the scion of a wealthy Eastern family are boring and irritating.

      Feb 14, 2011 at 10:09 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Cam
      Cam

      Wow, they are REALLY filtering out comments on here. the closest thing I wrote to a swear would would be this guys last name and my comment got screened.

      Feb 14, 2011 at 10:19 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Nick
      Nick

      He’s cute!

      Feb 14, 2011 at 11:00 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Shannon1981
      Shannon1981

      @Cam: Re word it. IDK what the deal is here lately, but they are screening A LOT. Maybe because the blog is a little more mainstream that it has been in the past? IDK

      Feb 14, 2011 at 1:29 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • tony x
      tony x

      Same old scum – who hasnt known gay men who hate the gay movement because they are uncomfortable with gayness.

      Feb 14, 2011 at 2:22 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • tony x
      tony x

      @Nick: You have low self esteem. How sad would it be for a Jewish person to be posting how handsome they think some turncoat Jew working with Hitler is.

      Feb 14, 2011 at 2:23 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • tony x
      tony x

      @McMike: I thought the same thing~ He is the biggest preppy girl in the video. Same as it ever was. Many of these traditionalist just want to keep as much of their inheritance as they can == and the hell with everyone else.

      Feb 14, 2011 at 2:25 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Rich
      Rich

      a white male conservative gay guy who loves all the “fun” of gay equality without paying any of the price, who also loathes gay people. What a Roy Cohn cliche!

      Feb 14, 2011 at 4:10 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • jasun mark
      jasun mark

      At what point did Conservatives start to be “all about being yourself?”

      I must have missed that. Because it seems more like “anyone who isn’t just like us needs to have special laws to target them and punish them for not being just like us.”

      Feb 14, 2011 at 4:31 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Cam
      Cam

      He doesn’t like gay people? Well I don’t like people wearing imitation Broks Bros. suits who are desperate to pretend that they are from a back east boating family.

      So, we even Hissy?

      Feb 14, 2011 at 5:03 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jason
      Jason

      Regardless of what one thinks of femme men, or bears, or leather daddies, or twinks, or preppies, or gym boys, the reality is that conservatives have never worked for gay rights. This miserable GOProud twerp should thank his stars for all the gay activists who came before him. If it weren’t for them, he’s still be hiding in the closet behind stacks of Brooks Bros. crappy clothes.

      Feb 14, 2011 at 6:43 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • hephaestion
      hephaestion

      Go easy on Matt Hissey. He’s VERY young, and we all said dumb things at that age, didn’t we? We are still under the influence of 18 years of anti-gay brain-washing at that age.

      Feb 14, 2011 at 8:06 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jaroslaw
      Jaroslaw

      Well Heph, I don’t know. Give him a chance to repent, but don’t go too easy. Remember the Hitler Youth organization took great advantage of such mushy minds.

      Jason – when will people realize the GOP is not progressive at all? I want to puke when I hear conservative radio talk about “alternatives” to Obamacare. If they cared so much about helping people get healthcare they would not have waited to simply oppose the President’s health initiative. Same for Gay rights, and everything else.

      Feb 14, 2011 at 10:49 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Fighting Frankie
      Fighting Frankie

      I love that his last name is Hissey! You can’t write this stuff!

      Feb 15, 2011 at 12:29 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Corvidae
      Corvidae

      I love you queerty commenters!

      Feb 15, 2011 at 2:33 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • doesn't matter
      doesn't matter

      mr. HISSEY– you need to shut the fuck up about all those gay people that you ‘don’t really like’…

      guess what you ignorant entitled FUCK– if it wasn’t for a bunch of DRAG QUEENS starting a riot, you wouldn’t have any rights AT ALL, so you need to shut your fucking mouth until you learn some history and some MOTHERFUCKING RESPECT!!!

      for the forseeable future (in the immortal words of my very clever boyfriend’s protest sign at the 2004 republican national convention): GAY REPUBLICANS = oxy MORONS!

      Feb 15, 2011 at 2:40 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • robert in NYC
      robert in NYC

      Typical republican self-loather. If it weren’t for the “flamers”, there would have been NO Stonewall and no semblance of equality, the moron. But then being gay and republican = oxymoron. Why is it their party doesn’t support equality? I know its not that important to most gay republicans but why? I guess personal wealth is more important in their twisted view of the world and to hell with the rest of us. Their party persistently votes agains them and they go on giving support, if that’s not sick I don’t know what is.

      Feb 15, 2011 at 1:06 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Rob
      Rob

      This kid goes to West Chester University in Pennsylvania. Let’s just say the intellectual caliber of kids that go there is not that high. I’ve met folks from West Chester and Widener, and it’s really the ‘deer in headlights’ when you try to have an intelligent conversation with them. So sad. Ironically, it’s just as FRUSTRATING for me to deal with idiots from West Chester and Widener as it is for him to deal with gay people.

      Feb 15, 2011 at 2:10 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      @doesn’t matter: That’s a really good point. He and many others forget that the fems at Stonewall are what gives him the ability to even be out in public.

      Believe me, if Repubs had they way, GLBT people would still be in the closet without any rights.

      Feb 15, 2011 at 2:15 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • justiceontherocks
      justiceontherocks

      @scott ny’er: It was not the “fems” at Stonewall. It was the cross-dressers who started the party.

      I wouldn’t be surprised if this kid is a cross-dresser.

      Feb 15, 2011 at 2:19 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Mykey
      Mykey

      that guy who said he loves sarah palin and doesn’t like the gay stereotype sound quite stereotypical to me, what with the hand gestures and the lisp. He should have just shut up around the part about being yourself, then go off to contradict himself. Is it just me or does conservative gay sound oxymoronic

      Feb 15, 2011 at 3:10 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • mattgmd
      mattgmd

      Hissey-sissy admires Palin – because she reminds him somehow of Teddy Roosevelt. And Margaret Hoover is married and straight, yet on the board of goproud. The repubs appear to be cozy with goproud but in my view: a rattlesnake might curl up with you to keep warm, but he is still a rattlesnake. I think they confuse being tolerated with being respected.

      Feb 17, 2011 at 3:30 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Oprah
      Oprah

      ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

      “gay people frustrate me” the gay republican kid with a Sarah Palin looking mother is a GAYYY!!! lol Talk about denial. poor soul, i feel sorry for him.

      PS i love hoover who occasionally appears on Oreilly factor! lol.

      Feb 17, 2011 at 6:21 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • James
      James

      I agree with that guy to a point, that some gay guys put on an act, but this guy has a lisp soooo… These people are fucking delusional if they think GOProud is a legitimate group for gay people.

      Feb 17, 2011 at 9:46 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Otoscope
      Otoscope

      Gay is ok but don’t act like your a flirt.

      xign

      Jan 13, 2012 at 2:16 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Michael St. John
      Michael St. John

      I’m really leery about the term “self-hating,” but if ever you could make the argument… And that comment about Sarah Palin and his mom? “Paging Dr. Freud!”

      Reading through the comments, I’m really tired of being told their is a “proper” way to be a gay man. Raging queens have every right to be raging queens. Conversely, not being particularly effiminate doesn’t make you “less gay” or some kind of assimilationist. But it you’re self worth as a gay man is tied to acting “masculine,” then you have more work to do on your identity issues.

      Jul 16, 2012 at 2:43 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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