Happy Endings: White Trash Sex Tape

• The Britney and Kevin sex tape is up for auction. Real or fake, we think we should be paid $1,000,000 to see Kevin Federline bare ass naked. Not the other way around. [My E Bid]

• Gay English and Welsh couples are now allowed to adopt little rugrats of their own. [Reuters UK]

• We don’t think the rumors about Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes’ baby being the reincarnated gay son of L. Ron Hubbard are true. That would imply that the baby might actually be Cruise’s. [NY Post].

• Our favorite political ally, Barney Frank, comes out swinging against the army for not doing enough about queer soldier Kyle Lawson’s gay-bashing a few months back. You don’t want to piss this queen off. [Advocate]

• Something always did seem a bit bitchy about the dad in Family Circus. [World of Wonder]