Real-life Harry Potter villainess Maggie Gallagher took quill to papyrus scroll on June 22nd, penning a somewhat nonsensical screed in the National Review titled “If Race and Gender Are Social Constructs, Why Not Sexual Orientation?” (Isn’t that a Morrissey song?)
Attempting to throw Rachel Dolezal, Bruce Jenner, and the consumer-fraud case against JONAH (Jews Offering New Alternatives For Healing) into the same bubbling cauldron, The National Organization for Marriage founder writes:
“Apparently, you can change your racial identity, but if you do, you are lying. You can dress up as a woman on the cover of Vanity Fair, and everyone must believe you are in fact female. But when it comes to sexual orientation, even the attempt to change your identity or behavior must be viewed as an imposition against the laws of nature, if not nature’s God.”
Related: Maggie Gallagher Loves To Wallow In Her Defeat. And Blame Others For It.
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As a smothering fog rolls in from the moors, Baggy Maggie continues: “[JONAH’s] weekend retreats incorporate some bizarre elements, but nothing stranger than the Esalen Institute and other hippie happenings in the 1970s did… it is the attempt to live a Torah-observant or Biblical life that is intolerable to the SPLC and must be shut down.”
We’ll remind you that JONAH’s “bizarre elements” — which you can read about here — include (but are not limited to) stripping off your clothes, beating effigies of your mother, being ridiculed in public with cries of “faggot” and “gay boy,” and violently grabbing two oranges that are meant to symbolize your testicles.
Sorry, but that’s not exactly assuming the lotus position and singing Kumbaya.
Rich Penway
I wouldn’t expect any less from her.
Joseph Dudley Manabat
She should try it then.
Donald Martin
She would.
Chris
Tell you what, Maggie: you can subject yourself to gay-conversion therapy, in which you are changed from whatever-you-are to being a lesbian. And then, you can report on whether you experienced anything like “weekend retreats [that] incorporate some bizarre elements, but nothing stranger than the Esalen Institute and other hippie happenings in the 1970s did…” Until then, STFU.
Colin McCoy
Well I think it would be fun to get a group of people together to chase her down with harpoon guns, but I have the common sense to recognize that it’s not something I should be doing.
Desert Boy
Maggie the Cow needs gastric by-pass surgery — STAT.
Milton Appleby
But she is serious about cheeseburgers.
AtticusBennett
the poor woman’s son is literally waiting for her to die so he can finally start living.
mcflyer54
Once the favorable marriage equality ruling is handed down Maggie will be announced as the winner of “The Biggest Loser”. And, unlike all previous winners, her selection will have had absolutely to do with weight loss – obviously.
GG
Jabba in drag.
Bjk
Queerty is such a liar – “Maggie Gallagher Thinks”
Maggie “the maggot” Gallagher does not think…
Stephen Meeks
Sow
princedeligne
Thats a pachyderm that should never ever speak.
John Kuehnle
Who the hell is she?
o.codone
if you want conversion therapy you should just go ahead and get it. nobody should tell me what to do with my psyche. keep your laws off my mind.
badtungsten
Come on guys, she is most deservedly a vile human being, but she isn’t vile because she’s overweight. Give her appearance a rest. Debate her statements, not how she looks. You’re essentially doing the same thing to her that conservatives do to Hillary Clinton. They focus on her hair, her makeup, her clothes.. instead of what she’s actually saying.
Mack
Actually she should try it to see if it will help her from eating so much. She could stand to lose at 100 pounds perhaps more. Then once she does see if it helped her from quit eating. Doubt very seriously it would.
NoCagada
The older she gets the more she looks like Pizza The Hutt from SPACEBALLS
Todd Hamilton
She’s trying to think while under the influance of a Krispy Kreme Overdose
DarkZephyr
“Apparently, you can change your racial identity, but if you do, you are lying.”
Exactly, just like if you try to change your sexual orientation. Thanks for providing a parallel that fits with what we have been trying to tell people like you Maggie. I am actually astonished that you included it.
“You can dress up as a woman on the cover of Vanity Fair, and everyone must believe you are in fact female.”
Specifically a transgender female. And being Transgender is an inborn trait just as race and sexual orientation.
“But when it comes to sexual orientation, even the attempt to change your identity or behavior must be viewed as an imposition against the laws of nature, if not nature’s God.”
Because it is, just like pretending to be a race that you aren’t is a lie, as you pointed out yourself.
jwtraveler
Why does anyone care what she thinks?
dvlaries
Failed obese she-swine, purposeless, friendless and certainly sexless sez what?
DarkZephyr
@John Kuehnle: “She is an executive committee member, former president and former chairman of the board of the National Organization for Marriage” (from Wikipedia). The National Organization for Marriage is a hate group (per the Southern Poverty Law Center) that has long been an enemy of LGBT people.
Avery Alvarez
Haggie Gagglepot strikes again!
Sean Hansen
@ words Bitch….FAT CAMP
Caoimhin Mikael Lycke
I think a lobotomy of her frontal lobe should be ordered ASAP!
Caoimhin Mikael Lycke
I say, lobotomize the cow!!!
Alex Rothwell
Like she would know any thing about the human condition.
Ladbrook
Maggie has an incredibly fucked-up personal life, and an odd love/hate relationship with her Catholic-based religious traditions, so it should surprise no one that she is so hate-filled. If this were 1965, she’d be marching to keep the black kids out of her child’s school, off his playground, and out of his pool.
Suicide would look great on her. I hope she tries it… soon.
James Decino
Looks like she thinks OVEREATING is harmless fun too. Shut up you fat bitch.
Rick Holtz
She must also think that rape, human trafficking and pedophilia are a laugh riot! What about bestiality and sex with the dead? Side splitting funny! Her new name should be “Maggie The Human Mattress!”
Tab-Eric Varney
That stupid bitch has the blood of LGBT youth on her hands. She’s so disgusting.
Sheldon Siegel
William Beverly
gay conversion therapy is mentally and physiologically damaging and i wonder how many gay teen have committed suicide or even attempted it because of the mentally corrosive after effects and the Mormon church full advocates this practice
Timothy Herbert
so then, rape is fun too I suppose.
1EqualityUSA
Formaldehyde floater.
Tony Lee Churchill
I was already laughing just seeing her photo, then made it through MG “thinks…” before becoming hysterical. I give up.
Glücklich
So that’s what happened to Dr. Laura…Macro Galaxy absorbed her.
kuma6963
@badtungsten: thank you! I hate seeing the same fact avoiding tactics – her words are hideous enough without having to focus on her weight. Whenever ppl do that it really makes me uncomfortable (which is ultimately my own issue), just reminds me of schoolyard bullying.
patricko
@kuma6963: it is quite similar to school yard bullying and speaks volumes about the personal integrity of those who engage in it.
Mike Jasinski
You know what’s also fun, Maggie? Diet and exercise!
Darryl Moir
Try a diet that might be fun as well, fucking pig
Paul Castilonia
She’s such a pig.
Arcamenel
She’s human trash and ugly but her weight isn’t something to mock.
Realitycheck
Guys go to the site of the article and post appropriate response,
that is one of the ways to combat this kind of horrors.
Thomas Hammond
Is she on drugs
Brian Hunter
Maybe using electric shock therapy for her to lose weight would be fun too!
Kevin J Desmond
Maybe if fat conversion therapy will work on her fat ass … hatefull cow !!!
Mark Alan McRoberts
Hey, I have an idea if it is just harmless fun lets try to turn you lesbian but I don’t have a good machine how about we cut off the end of an extention cord and try electric shock…. it just harmless fun, right.
Maniel Sid Krux
She also apparently thinks hostess cakes are harmless fun but we see how well thats working for her lol ! 🙂
Transiteer
I’ve met several women that look just like this whale, all had the same ugliness about them, both in physical features (they were all look-alikes!) but worse – they all had the same attitude: hurtful opinions on others (many many others), hateful toward others (many many others), and generally identical and thoroughly awful people. This whale fits the pack exactly. She must be, as I guessed all the others were, a wounded, hurt beast whose life is unpleasant and insecure. The answer is to strike out viciously at everyone. You might not be able to do anything about your physical appearance sweetie, but you can change your personality to one of support and empathy. Throwing darts at everyone hasn’t made you a happier person. And no one wants to be around (no pun intended) you.
Luis H. Lopez
She needs to get in therapy for over eating and learn to stop hating .
Looks like A cross between Bruce Valance and a wild boar!
billywonka
Conversion therapy doesn’t work.
Just like Maggie’s diet plan.
Anthony Canta
Numb skull. If she is straight, or whatever, let’s put her through conversion therapy to make her the opposite of whatever she is!!!
Brandon E Donovan
It is the most evil thing I can think of! It’s telling people that they have to be someone who they aren’t. It’s like trying to teach a black guy to be white
Brandon E Donovan
You should go watch the movie Prayers for Bobby and tell me what you think then
Patrick Flanagan
where do these PARASITES COME FROM?? SHE’s another so-called EDUCATED DUMB CUNT!
Stephanie Renee Whinthrop
Then let’s use the same techniques on her.
Thomas Riccobuono
Hey! What’s black and white and red all over and can’t turn in a hallway? Maggie Gallagher with a harpoon in her neck.
1EqualityUSA
Well…..at least she not going to light herself on fire. Mounds of tires would burn out faster than she.