Oldest Jonas Bro Gets Married So He Can 1) Have Sex 2) Prove He's Straight
 
 

kevinjonasmouth

Twenty-one-year-old Kevin Jonas, the oldest of three Jonas brothers who comprise the pop boy band, asked Danielle Deleasa, a 22-year-old "former hairdresser," whom Kevin met two years ago in the Bahamas, to marry him. The media's joke is that Kevin will get to replace his purity ring with a wedding band, and start making sweet love for the first time in his young life. Our joke is that, like any gay, Kevin married someone who works in hair.

 
Jul 2, 2009 · Link · 15 Responses
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Comments (15)

No. 1 · Mike L.

Blowjob face lol I suspect it's no coincidence.

Posted: Jul 2, 2009 at 11:35 am
No. 2 · John Santos

Normally I'm happy for a couple when they get engaged, but I find this just sad.

Posted: Jul 2, 2009 at 11:42 am
No. 3 · Mike L.

Yeah, watch he'll come out in his mid 4o's and say he was born in the wrong body and transition to womanhood. A lot of the stories of people that have transitioned do so during their late 30's mid 40s. I guess since it's not as bad today as it once was (although it's still controversial).

Posted: Jul 2, 2009 at 12:34 pm
No. 4 · prissysissy

Who are the Jonas brothers?

Posted: Jul 2, 2009 at 12:46 pm
No. 5 · A C

Thanks for ruining my day Q.

Posted: Jul 2, 2009 at 1:15 pm
No. 6 · TANK

I'm destroyed. Now he has to get rid of that proimise keeper haircut. No more capri sun with the boys at the skateboard park… There is no god!

Posted: Jul 2, 2009 at 1:54 pm
No. 7 · myrios123

Thank god it wasn't either of the cute ones. Next…

Posted: Jul 2, 2009 at 2:51 pm
No. 8 · D-Sun

I give it three years before it comes out that he's been banging that guy who plays the older brother on Wizards of Waverly Place, he comes out of the closet, and the whole thing develops into a giant scandal and nasty divorce.

Posted: Jul 2, 2009 at 3:46 pm
No. 9 · nhy

LOL Ya'll I hope he is still a virigne if not… well… he'll go straight to hell.

Posted: Jul 2, 2009 at 4:19 pm
No. 10 · alan brickman

marriage is still the best gay cure??..nice…

Posted: Jul 2, 2009 at 9:14 pm
No. 11 · derrysf

Why do all the catty bitches on this blog assert he's gay? Besides wishful thinking, I mean.

Posted: Jul 2, 2009 at 11:56 pm
No. 12 · JERRY SMATHERS

Why do so many bitter queens who are afraid to be themselves throw hissy fits in defense of celebrities who don't know they're alive, and at the same down put down other gay guys? That's just wrong.

Posted: Jul 3, 2009 at 10:55 am
No. 13 · Marius

Purity Rings, toilet seat bands in a hotel or the foil covers under the lids of Planter's Peanuts – the only one I really believe in is the Planter's foil. The other two require trust in my fellow human beings. I don't think I have that.

Feel sad for me, but happy for the plain Jonas brother. Good luck on your wedding night. Hope you know where to put it.

Posted: Jul 5, 2009 at 1:11 am
No. 14 · TANK

He's gonna be sooooo disappointed when he learns the difference between boys and girls. SOOOOO DISAPPOINTED!

Posted: Jul 5, 2009 at 1:47 am
No. 15 · Gayminem_lol

I don't think Kevin and Nick Jonas are Gay….but my gaydar beeps like crazy whenever I see Joe Jonas…….he is just plain gay….that's all…..and have u guys seen their youtube video where Joe Jonas dances like Beyonce in "Single ladies"……for cryin out loud…….he just proved that my gaydar is workin fine……

Posted: Aug 15, 2009 at 6:24 pm
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