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‘SHOCK': Serbian Non-Doctor Reveals Cure For Homosexuality (It Involves Lots of Bowel Cleansing)

Though Mirojlub Petrovic is not a doctor, that’s not stopping the Serbian bigot (or the press) from calling himself one, or opening a facility to cure you of The Gay.

Petrovic, who practices something called “original medicine” — I’m sure he’s got the cure to cancer buried in his doctor’s office magazine shelf — says the “problem of homosexualism” has been running rampant throughout his country, but really took off with last year’s attempt at a pride parade in Belgrade. And now, with his certification from the the International Institute of Original Medicine, he and some cronies are seeing their Cure The Gay outfit really take off. But how does this magic work? He explains to RFE’s Jamie Kirchick:

Quite simply: Patients must cut out junk food from their diet, “drink a lot of water,” “reject anything that is diarrhetic, alcohol, caffeine,” engage in “physical activity,” “rest [at] appropriate times.” Plus, one “must think about good things.” Oh, and receive regular enemas.

When I asked if Petrovic had any success stories, he replied in the affirmative, and that he has received a flood of new patients “especially in the last two weeks” because of the publicity surrounding the march. In Petrovic’s eyes, he isn’t just curing gays of an affliction; he’s saving them from a possible death sentence. Though he acknowledges that “you cannot execute homosexuals” at this point, he supports a system that would ultimately give gays a choice: change your behavior or face the death penalty.

What’s amusing is that I know dozens of gay men and women who already follow that exact diet. Because gays are fitness and diet freaks! They are obsessed with drinking a lot of water, working out, avoiding toxins like booze and coffee, and yes some of them get enemas. Regularly! And yet: They’re as gay as today is purple.

By:           RYAN TEDDER
On:           Oct 20, 2010
Tagged: , , ,
  • 10 Comments
    • Matthew
      Matthew

      I just see a closeted guy trying to cover up his homosexuality by bashing or hating on us. I hear its very common in the Catholic religion :D

      Oct 20, 2010 at 2:23 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • REBELComx
      REBELComx

      whoa whoa whoa….a healthy diet, regular exercise, thinking happy thoughts, and regular rectal cleansing is supposed to make you LESS gay? This guy’s never been to Chelsea or West Hollywood has he.

      Oct 20, 2010 at 2:25 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jeffree
      Jeffree

      Lemme guess: The non-Doctor actually *oversees* the administration of the enemas !

      Don’t be surprised if this fad makes it over the ocean to the USA!

      Oct 20, 2010 at 2:40 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • scott ny'er
      scott ny'er

      What a DOUCHE!!! (see what I did there.)

      Oct 20, 2010 at 3:26 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
      PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS

      Talk ’bout carefull what you wish for. Dr. Squareheads “cure” is gonna produce lots of healthy, buff Gay dudes running rampart thru his country lookin for lots of Gay sex……….

      Oct 20, 2010 at 3:46 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • CHIP1218
      CHIP1218

      @Matthew:

      Serbs aren’t Catholic, they are Orthodox.

      There’s a new gay club that opened in Belgrade, is that what he means by running rampant?

      Oct 20, 2010 at 10:08 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • L.
      L.

      So his cure for homosexuality involves bowel cleansing, just like anal sex does. What a coincidence.

      Oct 21, 2010 at 7:27 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • meego
      meego

      Best laugh I’ve had today :)

      Oct 21, 2010 at 7:55 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Cam
      Cam

      So basically all we have learned is that this guy is stone cold sober every time he gives himself an ennema.

      Oct 21, 2010 at 5:12 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • B
      B

      He sort of has a point – you want to be sober enough to pick the right hole, get the angle approximately correct, and pick the right implement. If you don’t do that, bad things can happen (see a performance of Madame Butterfly for an example of what can go wrong).

      Oct 22, 2010 at 12:56 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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