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20 questions for queer couples in the New Year

A queer couple celebrates New Years together. They are toasting drinks
Cheers to the New Year!

Hey there, lovebirds! As we step into the New Year, it’s the perfect time for some reflection, especially when it comes to our relationships. And what better way to kick-start this journey than with a set of meaningful questions for queer couples? These questions aren’t just conversation starters; they’re your secret recipe for a deeper connection.

In the spirit of fresh beginnings, let’s dive into these questions for queer couples. These heartfelt conversations will take you on a journey through the past, present, and future, revealing stories, dreams, and aspirations that will make your bond even stronger.

So pour yourself some egg nog and ask your honey these 20 questions for queer couples to kickstart a year filled with love and understanding:

Stories about the Past:

  1. What event from your childhood stands out the most? Why?
  2. When you think back to when we first met and started dating, what do you remember? What were some of the highlights for you?
  3. When you were a kid, which adult in your life influenced you the most? How?
  4. What are you the most proud of in your life so far?
  5. Looking back over our relationship, what is your fondest memory? What times stand out as the really hard times?
  6. Tell me about your parents’ marriage. What was it like?
  7. Tell me a story about you and your best friend in childhood.
  8. What was the most embarrassing moment in your life so far? What happened?
  9. What messages did you get about gay people and same-sex relationships growing up?
  10. Tell me your “coming out” story again.


Stories about the Future:

  1. What are your biggest aspirations and dreams? How can I support you in making those a reality?
  2. What personal improvements would you like to make in the new year? How can I help you?
  3. What is your life mission? Do you see yourself as having a purpose? If so, what is it?
  4. What are your hopes for our children?
  5. What would you like the two of us to accomplish as a couple?
  6. What are your financial goals?
  7. What are your spiritual goals?
  8. What areas of our relationship would you like us to work on? What would our relationship look like if we improved those things?
  9. How do you want people to remember you? What do you want your legacy to be?
  10. When we’re both 80 years old, what kinds of conversations would you like us to be having?

Remember, a couple that answers together, stays together! And hey, if you want more heartwarming insights, don’t forget to subscribe to the Queerty newsletter. Happy bonding, lovebirds!

Jeff Lutes is a psychotherapist who lives with his husband and their three adopted children in Austin, Texas. This article was originally published on The Bilerico Project.

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