Southern Inhospitality

A-List‘s Taylor Garrett Gets Punched, His Car Vandalized, Becomes Delusional

Gay Christian Republican/A-List Dallas cast member Taylor Garrett filed a police report on Friday claiming that a 6′ 2″, 200-pound bearded man in a baseball cap punched him in the face and scratched “Fuck Couther” into the side of his car. The bearded guy probably meant to scratch “Fuck Coulter” into Garrett’s car because of Garrett’s association with demon she-beast Ann Coulter.

Getting your ass kicked by an illiterate vandal blows.

At least Garrett didn’t wait four days to file a police report like he did when someone allegedly threw a rock through his window for his GOP leanings. This time he also posted an image of his bloodied ear onto Twitter.

A more detailed timeline of the broken window fiasco has emerged, with mention of a second rock. Laura Martin, LGBT liaison officer for the Dallas Police Department said, “I wouldn’t have any reason to think that [the first attack] didn’t happen the way [Garrett]’s presented it.”

Meanwhile, in response to the second attack, Garrett said, “The Democrats want me to live on their plantation as their slave, because I’m a gay person. And I refuse to do that.”

So, the white Republican who paid to have his balls electrocuted on cable television is now comparing himself to the likes of Frederick Douglass? That’s a crime in and of itself.