Bushie Longs For bin Laden’s Sweet Terrorist Ass

Speaking of eagle-eyes, herb-loving homo-journo Andrew Sullivan spotted a scandalous little blurb in Haaretz‘s review of Uri Dan’s new Ariel Sharon biography:

Speaking of George Bush, with whom Sharon developed a very close relationship, Uri Dan recalls that Sharon’s delicacy made him reluctant to repeat what the president had told him when they discussed Osama bin Laden. Finally he relented. And here is what the leader of the Western world, valiant warrior in the battle of cultures, promised to do to bin Laden if he caught him: “I will screw him in the ass!”

Now we know why Bush and his cronies are so intent on finding bin Laden. It’s not about 9/11, Kenya or their petty quest for world domination! It’s, quite simply, history’s deadliest case of unrequited love. bin Laden may be a homicidal maniac, but he’s far better looking (and more wealthy) than Bush. No way he’d go for that Texan pansy. Also, President Bush, sorry to burst you bubble, but we actually think it’s bin Laden who would screw you in the ass.