damage control

Dharun Ravi’s Anonymous Friends Defend Him Against Lifelong Reputation Of Being A Scumbag

And here come Dharun Ravi’s friends to defend him against allegations he’s an utter dipshit asshole!

“No one knows [what really happened],” says one person “close to” Ravi, but who doesn’t want to go on the record with Rutgers’ student paper The Daily Targum. Adds another: “He’s a good guy who made a poor decision.”

You see, Ravi didn’t really want to hurt Tyler Clementi, who jumped to his death off the George Washington Bridge following his roommate Ravi aiming a webcam at him. He was just, uh, curious. Yeah, let’s go with that.

Students said Clementi asked his roommate Ravi to leave the room so that he could have time alone with a guest on the evening of Sept. 19. A strange, older male later arrived at the room, they said. Ravi went to Wei’s room, where he used a computer to access footage of the room from his webcam, they said.

Ravi had no intention of witnessing any kind of intimate encounter between the two, but rather wanted to see if anything unusual was taking place inside his room, as he was not familiar with Clementi’s guest, they said. “He just wanted to see what was going on,” a student said. Upon seeing what was taking place inside the room, Ravi immediately closed the window on the screen, the student said.

A similar series of events took place on the evening of Sept. 21, and Ravi then stayed in another friend’s room for the night, a student said. No footage of either encounter was recorded or broadcast, students said. “[Ravi] had no intention to violate Tyler in any way,” a student said.

And he totally didn’t have a problem with gays, one former classmate says of Ravi.

Friends described Ravi as an outgoing Ping-Pong player and Frisbee enthusiast who enjoyed a good prank. “I think he’s a good person,” said Michael Zhuang, 17, a neighbor and former classmate. “I don’t think he’s a homophobe. It would’ve been no different if it was a girl in the room.”

And it was only a matter of time before Clementi’s death was blamed on … The Gays! Enter Vox Day: “It is obvious that Clementi didn’t kill himself simply because his actions were made public; as a musician, no doubt he had been filmed before and some of those films may have even been put online. He killed himself because he could not live with the shame of knowing that everyone would be aware of his submission to what he apparently believed to be evil desires. While giving in to our desire for evil is something that we all do from time to time, it is also true that some desires happen to be more shameful or humiliating than others. For example, a man’s desire for his neighbor’s wife is sinful, but few consider it to be as appalling as his desire for his neighbor’s child.”

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  • Cam

    If he just wanted to make sure that nothing weird was going on….then why did he twitter that his roomate was kissing a guy, and then later tell people to sign on that night for a broadcast showing his roomate with another guy?

    Say that the guy was your friend, say that he did something stupid, but don’t try to lie to hide what he did, it won’t work, cached footage of his facebook page has already been all over the internet showing him not only outing his roomate but inviting people to sign on later to watch his roomate through hidden camera.

  • Andy

    Ah, so the video accidentally made itself available online and the guy tweeted accidentally, again by just hitting the right keys and clicks.

    It was a ‘puter virus! I swear!

  • chiturbo

    I’m inclined to agree that this young man is not outwardly bigoted towards LGBTs. However, his behavior proves that he has no respect for it, which, in essence, is no different. I wonder how funny it is to him now that his life has been made a public spectacle…

  • fishy

    This whole story is fishy. Have the police even identified the body that is supposedly his? Yet the “family lawyer” jumps the gun and confirms his death? Is this the kind of family that has a family lawyer ready-to-go? After Tyler posts fairly normal and rational messages about the webcam incident on a message board? Something doesn’t add up.


    that some of the Queerty posters infect other sites also……… :p


    I see some of the Queerty posters infect other sites also……… :p

  • Cam


    Oh so you must be the one that went and put thumbs down on all of the comments. We get it, you’re friends with the guy….but are you honestly trying to attack a family that just lost their kid to a suicide? Is that REALLY what you are doing? No wonder you don’t find what the roomate did distasteful, you would seem to be just as big an ass.

    As for the family having a “Family Lawyer”. The family can call any lawyer out of the yellow pages and when that lawyer talks to the press, or contacts the University guess what…they are now “The Family Lawyer”.

    Lastly, the police will always contact the family before releasing information on a body, so yes, the family and the lawyer would have that information before the press would.

    Ok, there, answered all your issues, or is there something else you would like to say to insult and attack the family of this dead boy?

  • Nelson


    Why haven’t you taken down MrDiva’s racist comment? Ravi may be a dirt bag but there is no need for hateful, racist epithets being used.

  • seaguy

    I hope the jerk gets sent to prison and bitched out while there!

  • Fitz

    I doubt that he intended to trigger a suicide… but CLEARLY from his quoted tweets he thought it was hilariously humiliating to broadcast TO THE WORLD that this guy was having gay sex. I am not there with being ready to hear about what a swell guy he is. He is a murderer.

  • JNunz

    I’m all for free speech, but I would really have hoped that MrDivaBitch’s comment would have been a complete thumbs down. That seven of you have given it a thumbs up is just sad – really, really sad.

    The same people that use that term are the ones who call us fags, call black people the “n” word, call women bitches. Why the hell would anyone reading this sight be supportive of such hatred.


  • Polly

    I hope Ravi rotts in hell and his professional life in the USA is nonexistent. May he suffer the agony he’s caused.

  • Taylor Siluwé

    @MrDivaBitch: You should probably take your message over to that VOX link. The collection of cretinous life forms there left me too speechless to comment.

    I swear, my head got so hot I just had to close that window. If the devil is real, that’s where he lives.

  • Tommy

    Ravi sounds like one of those Jekell and Hyde people. We’ve all known them. They can seem all charming nice and normal to their friends. But watch out! Because they have a dark side and can turn and do something horrible that you’d never expect.
    I’m sure his friends are telling the truth when they say he was a great guy, but that there stuff about him he didn’t tell them and they didn’t know.
    some of his tweets that I read were definitely homophobic. I thought I read he had said if you kiss a guy you get enough germs to get pneumonia or something like that.
    If he did the same thing to Tyler and a girl he was having sex with would that have been right? It’s still about humiliating someone and invading their privacy.

  • Brandon H

    No one is saying he is an intentional bigot. Everyone is saying he is recklessly ignorant, malicious and disgusting human being. Bigot’s aren’t the only people worthy of scorn, yet these “friends” seem to think so long as no one’s racist or homophobic, everything is OK.

  • MrDivaBitch

    @Taylor Siluwé:

    No, the devil lives in weak stupid people who are too scared to fight back.

  • MrDivaBitch


    You are so stupid. People who treat us like shit do not deserve our respect AT ALL.

    That weak “please don’t hurt me” attitude so many gays have is why we are such an easy target. Well, excuse me honey but I’m gonna be one of those weak self-hating gays, I will fight back whoever wants to hurt me more ferociously.

    “I consume my consumer, with no sense of humor” – Grace Jones.

  • MrDivaBitch

    That weak “please don’t hurt me” attitude so many gays have is why we are such an easy target. Well, excuse me honey but I’m NOT gonna be one of those weak self-hating gays, I will fight back whoever wants to hurt me more ferociously.

    “I consume my consumer, with no sense of humor” – Grace Jones.

  • Taylor Siluwé

    Whatever Diva, I just thought you wanted a sympathetic ear for your cold, racist bullshit. My bad.

  • Manster

    There is absolutely NOTHING that can be said that validates Ravi’s actions and responsibility in the death of Tyler Clementi!

    ANYONE that is ignorant enough to try to do so is just as evil as he is, and the only thing I hope is that if justice or fate does not get Ravi, then I pray that there is a hell for him to burn in!

    Nuff said!

  • Taylor Siluwé

    No. 10 · seaguy

    If the first part of your wish comes true, the second part goes without saying.

  • Taylor Siluwé

    Has anyone dug up any more pictures of this Ravi, the cyber rapist? I can’t find any.

  • JNunz

    @MrDivaBitch: Please make sure to keep FoxNews on speed dial in the (unlikely) event that they look to hire a bigoted gay voice to add fuel to their fires of hatred.

    Refusing to lump an entire group of people as “haters” based on the actions of just one does not make me weak. In fact, it makes me and the gay movement STRONGER. It means that I actually take the time to decipher who is supportive of gay rights vs. who is not, so that (in your example) those Southeast Asians who ARE supportive are not alientated and will be more willing to stand by my side and stand up for our rights.

    The gay rights movement uses the rainbow as our symbol for a reason, you idiot.

  • me

    So what is Dharun Ravi’s address, email and phone number?

  • Patrick

    Ravi is a douche bag, did anyone think his friends would not be likewise? I’d love to get his email and phone number out on the web.

  • MsDivaWhore

    Don’t forget his chink fish accomplice.

  • Michelle O'Bama

    Am I the only one who thinks Tyler Clementi looks like Straight Acting Erik?

  • ForeverGay

    VoxDay blog shows why I use the term HATERosexual. There is nothing except a deep boiling hatred HATERosexuals have for gay people. It’s because you are not haterosexual. They believe because you are not haterosexual they have every right to do and say whatever to you. You become their play toy and you can’t do anything back or they will make things worse. Dharun Ravi thought it would be funny to humilate Tyler because he’s gay. I’m sure the livestream video was only the last thing in a long line of anti-gay harrassment.

  • Mike

    I’m insulted by the fact that I’m suppose to believe he didn’t know the cam was on and was only interested in his roommate’s sexuality. I can paint to be homophobic but the fact that I’m not suppose to think that This guy is not a Douche is equally absurd. The fact he deleted the twitter account with his his tweets regarding his roommate Conclusively shows he knows what he has done is Wrong an that he will face consequences for his actions.
    Somehow I thinK he’ll weasel his way out of a harsh penalty however.

  • BusyBoudoir

    I say jail isn’t enough for this kid. I think he deserves a life-time sentence to community service for local LGBT nonprofits and anti-suicide groups. I’m not sure what the maximum sentencing guidelines are for community service, could a judge give him so many hours that it would be impossible for him to hold down a full-time job?

    Coupled with making him repay his student loans in FULL, expelling him, and financial compensation to the family that should destroy his class status. Then, make him register as a sex offender.

    To me, that sounds like the best way to destroy his private life and whatever hopes he had for the future WHILE keeping him a productive member of society who will be forever tortured by guilt and shame.

  • Xtian99

    most tragic of all- Ravi is yest another of the asian persuasion who is “an outgoing Ping-Pong player and Frisbee enthusiast! ugh…

    seriouly, I hope he lives the rest of his life in severe emotional pain realizing what he did/pain he caused another human being. what an infantile thing to do…

  • Chitown Kev

    Queerty needs to do somethin’-somethin’ about the racism in these comments.

  • Not Dharun Ravi

    @Chitown Kev: Free speech, baby, free speech.

  • Devon

    This guy probably doesn’t hate gay people, he probably didn’t think this would lead to his roommate killing himself, he’s probably just a douchebag who thought it would be funny to broadcast someone having sex online without his knowledge.

    Don’t get me wrong, he should still be prosecuted for this and ideally he should serve some kind of prison sentence, but I just don’t think he’s the heartless, homophobic monster who deserves to rot in prison that some people are making him out to be. More likely he’s just an idiotic freshman who did some stupid shit in the name of “comedy.”

  • hephaestion

    Dharun Ravi should be expelled from Rutgers for starters. Then put in jail for murder.

  • alamoboy

    1 Cottonwood Ct

    Plainsboro, NJ 08536-2064

    (609) 716-8995

  • GaryG

    This is an undeniable, almost incomprehensible tragedy. Reading about these teenagers suicides over the past few weeks, has left me at different times in tears. I can think of not one thing to defend Ravi, or any of the other bullies that have caused these souls to end their lives. Thereby stating that, I clicked on the link to this Vox whatever-you-call it website. I started reading the comments, and I just could not believe the non-sensical bile and undisguised hatred pouring out of practically every word. It made me sick, it made me angry, and it sort of makes me afraid. Now, I hope that I’m totally off-base here, but the comments I read on that website made me think not only are these people certifiable, I’d also bet money that this is what we’d hear from tea partiers. No, I’m not trying to turn this into something political, democrat vs republican vs whatever else is out there. And I know I’m probably rambling, I guess this whole story just really upsets me and I just needed a place to vent. Thanks for listening

  • Fitz

    Let’s not sink into racism, if for no other reason than the fact that this isn’t as simple as that.

  • Mal Tempo

    On a so-called gay website, the victim is not receiving much sympathy…no wonder this killer and his girl friend will walk away with a slap on the wrist.

  • Paul

    One of his friends said Ravi “enjoyed a good prank”. I hope he enjoys the pranks that the inmates in state prison play on him when he gets there.

    Piece of human waste. And I’m straight.

  • Jon

    As a gay student at Rutgers, I am especially devastated by these events. In my three years ago, I have grown to recognize my school as the most open and welcoming place I have ever known. Tyler’s death is a horrible tragedy that should not have happened anywhere, but especially here at Rutgers. Today there was a deep sense of mourning and utter embarassment on campus, with one of my professors on the verge of tears and another so extremely angry that he took 15 minutes out of class time to discuss the issue. We are all shocked and ashamed that two ignorant students would make such a grave mistake, and thus mar the reputation of Rutgers, an institution whose diversity we all enjoy. I am deeply troubled that Tyler felt that he could not reach out to the numerous LGBT associations and resources on campus– BiglaRU, DLP, LLEGO, the Demarest Sex and SExuality Interest group… I mean, we have a dean whose only job it is to provide support to LGBT students . What Tyler went through was horrible, inexpressibly so, but I have been touched by the outpouring of support around the world, and especially right here. This weekend is Homecoming, and thousands of students on Facebook have already expressed their desire to wear black to the game in order to mourn the loss of this precious life. There was a vigil last night, and there is another event planned for tomorrow at the student center. I appreciate that you all and the rest of the world are mourning our loss, and may something like this never happen again.

  • Jack

    Harold and Kumar go to jail?

  • sunanda roychoudhury

    i believe school needs to teach moral lessons to the kids

  • Adam

    This case has really touched an emotional chord in me. Maybe it is because there has been a rash of gay teen suicides recently, all of them related to the experience of being bullied or disrespected.

    Seems like Tyler Clementi was an amazing person — talented, focused, quiet, and considerate. If he is the [cit…] blogger who wrote over days of his roommate’s utter disregard for his privacy and of fears that nothing would result from raising the issue to school authorities, he comes across as increasingly comfortable with his sexuality (although not out yet) and very articulate. (Granted he was expressing himself in the relative safety of a gay web site.) I believe it was the fact of having his privacy and his person twice disrespected by the deliberate cybercasting of very private encounters — and not any “shame” in being gay — that led him to take his life. Sad that some find it entertaining and permissible to so violate another. Tragic that he left us too soon and his family and friends are devastated. More than enough pain.

  • MrDivaBitch


    LOL you are such a pussy, weak gays like you that cry because the wind blew too strongly are the reason why most of society doesn’t respect us. If most gays were like me, strong, aggressive, militant and DEMANDING respect, like African American groups such as the black panthers and others did in the 60’s then we would have equal rights LOOOOONG time ago, but of course we can’t…too many prissy little idiots complaining coz someone looked at them in a mean way.

    And by the way, the origin of the rainbow flag has to do with the song “Somewhere over the raibow”, and the different colors have specific meanings within the rainbow flag (there used to be pink and turquoise as well, but were taken out)red (life), orange (healing), yellow (sunlight), green (nature), blue (harmony), and purple/violet (spirit).

    And what Indian/Pakistani gay sympathizers are you speaking of? India and Pakistan are extremely homophobic countries, except for the hijras in India which are seen as “lucky freaks”, being gay in India/Pakistan is no different than it was being gay in the 50’s in U.S.

    Please educate yourself more making such ignorant and stupid comments.

  • Forrest

    Doubt they will do jail time. College kids with good lawyers and first offense equals fines and community service. At least this will stigmatize them for years and they should be expelled.

  • AdonisOfFire

    I find extremely disturbing that although we are attacked and victimized constantly so many people will refuse to stand up for themselves and fight back. MrDivaBitch is right, if we fought back we wouldn’t be treated as second-glass citizens.

  • AdonisOfFire

    *Second class

    Typo :P

  • David

    I’m not gay nor do I play one on TV, but I am horrified by this story. Poor Mr. Clementi simply lacked the experience to fight through the emotions that gripped him after his life was invaded by his supposed friends. Their actions were cruel and selfish in the extreme. It is striking to me that eight days have passed and neither Ravi nor Molly appear to have apologized or expressed regret. Some people just lack basic decency. Molly and Ravi are within that group.

    Does it matter that Mr. Clementi was gay? Well, certainly it mattered to him. The fact that a heterosexual might have had a similar reaction is irrelevant.

  • Michael

    I really do not understand blogs and others making statements like; “It’s obvious…” “We clearly know…” All that we really know, is that Tyler is dead, and two fellow students have been been charged with invasion of privacy.

  • KiomainNY

    All you responding to Mr.Divab*tch are choosing to not comment on the epidemic in our society that is LGBT BULLYING….HOMOPHOBIA…Stick to the damn story. This kid was killed, tortured, bashed, tornmented and some of you are more concerned to school some troll who is probably 12 and thriving off the attention. You coudl contribute something to THIS story…this guy died. Instead, all you have to contribute is an exchange with someone begging for your attention?
    No wonder gay suicide stories don’t get as much media exposure…gay people have A.D.D when it comes to the TRAGIC topic at hand which is NOT making a martyr out of the accusers because some troll called them a name, but making a BIG DEAL over nearly 10 suicides linked to homophobia with LGBT youth.

  • Sug Night

    Who cares if he is homophobic or not, that is not the point. The point is he invaded someone’s privacy, broadcast his having sex online and drummed up business to tune in and view it. Did he broadcast the sex because it was man-to-man sex? Perhaps. Did he know the student was closted and obviously still wrestling with his sexuality and coming out? No doubt he did, which makes him the biggest asshole in Jersey (and that’s saying a lot!).

    The RESULT, not the INTENTION, is what matters. And the result is horrific and tragic.

    I think little Ravi and Molly need to take a little swim in the Hudson River as well. I’d like to give them a gentle nudge off the GWB myself.

    Big Brother, if you are monitoring us, JUST KIDDING (NOT!)

  • Jack E. Jett

    hey ravi and friends

    go jump your bigoted tired ass off a bridge and shut the fuck up you sick bastard closet cases.

  • TruthTeller

    And somebody tell this Taylor Siluwe character to knock off his preaching. Anybody who is such a hater that he joined the lynch mob in the Duke lacrosse rape hoax shouldn’t criticize anyone at all.

  • Rob Moore

    @chiturbo: I expect his life has been more than made a public spectacle. It is likely he will be expelled by Rutgers. If he is found guilty of the more serious charge, he will face a possible prison sentence, which will effectively mean many universities including the tier 1 universities will not consider him for enrollment. My question is which aspect of this is causing him remorse? Is it the fact he set in motion a series of consequences leading to his roommate’s suicide; the fact his long-term friend also faces expulsion although her involvement seems more passive; or is it just the fact his life is now crumbling before his eyes because his roommate failed to see the humour of having his life exposed? I hope he at least learns that actions have consequences and sometimes those consequences are severe.

    I notice that no one is talking about the other person whose intimate details were also exposed whilst having sex with Tyler Clementi.

  • Hylomorphic

    Did you really have to give Vox Day free publicity out of this? Really?

    The man is undoubtedly smart, but has a grade A ego trip keeping him from actually understanding much. No need to bolster it by making it look like he bothers you any more than someone with far less intelligence.

  • BusyBoudoir

    @Rob Moore:

    That’s probably because the guy Tyler was with, for all we know, is still alive. Yes his privacy being violated is terrible, but it just isn’t the same on the human tragedy scale.

    I was thinking about that other guy today, and I felt like that could happen to me or to any one of my friends. His involvement in this is just…random, horrible chance. And whatever their relationship was (one night stand or something deeper), I’m sure as a human being he must be feeling a lot of complex emotions right now.

    Perhaps its best that we all learn from this and do what Dharun Ravi didn’t: know when to mind our own business. The more we discuss the “other guy”, the more someone will do some sleuthing and expose him to the world.

  • daseekah

    why isnt this ravi dude in prison yet…NEXT

  • JoeyO'H

    Ravi did exactly what he sought out to do- expose and embaress (I’m using nice words) Clementi. He accomplished that and so much more. He is, whether people wish to dispute or deny, indirectly responsible for his death.

    This is a hate crime- a cyber hate crime and this young man should go to prison for the crime he commited.

    If it were me, at 18, I would have been beside myself, having my personal sex life broadcast online.

    And for the jack-offs who believe that he threw himself over the GW because he knew it (gay sex) was “evil,” I say bullshit! From seeing his facebook entries, he seemed to be open about his sexuality.

    Send Ravi to prison where he can be somebody’s bitch.

    I hope Clementi’s death is not in vain and people will learn and tolerate others who may be different that themselves.
    This is a terrible, terrible tragedy that with the recent wave of suicides has me very upset and concerned of the well being gay youth.

  • jason

    If this is the standard of college student in America, God help us. They seem to be regressive rather than progressive. Is it my imagination or are young people in America becoming increasingly homophobic and stupid?

    We’re seeing now the fruits of a generation brought up on homophobic rap music and white trash like Eminem. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

  • Ravi and Wei: 2 reasons for full-term abortions

    If I found out I had 6 weeks/months to live, I would hunt down those 2 homophobic self-centered assholes and kill them myself. Another idea is let’s get the prisoner who put Jeffrey Dahmer out of our misery and let him have a whack at them. Better yet let’s send them to Afghanistan and use them as bomb sniffers. At the very least they can save valuable lives while snuffing out their own pathetic useless existence.

  • Taylor Siluwé

    No. 53 · TruthTeller
    And somebody tell this Taylor Siluwe character to knock off his preaching. Anybody who is such a hater that he joined the lynch mob in the Duke lacrosse rape hoax shouldn’t criticize anyone at all.

    I always say, you haven’t lived ’til you’ve had a stalker. A couple of things, ‘Truth’ …

    ONE: We all instantly react to stories of rape and some wish ill on the perps and joke about their soon-to-be prison comeuppance, long before all the facts come to light. For some reason though, you seen obsessed with stalking me (anonymously, of course) to keep reminding me of that fact. That’s your cowardly right, so have at it.

    TWO: You must have an extremely tedious, sad and lonely existence to find me so endlessly interesting. I’m actually a little flattered. This thing we have is lasting longer than some of my relationships. But why use your time more productively. Dig up pictures of me exposing my goodies to the world and then start a website dedicated to hating evil ol’ me. I’m giddy at the thought.

    Stalk on, my friend. ;-)

  • Cam

    I love how the friends keep claiming that he just did a foolish thing.

    Give me a break, if he had put a camera in a woman’s room and broadcast her coming out of the shower and changing, or having sex with her boyfriend, nobody would be on here defending him.

  • Sherry Wolf

    The crime is that LGBT people continue to be held in an official state of civil inequality that foments a soulless social pathology toward sexual minorities in this country.

    Who Really Killed Tyler Clementi? http://bit.ly/czKk5j

  • robert in nyc

    I hope these two idiots don’t get into any other college,ever. If Ravi and his co-conspirator aren’t homophobic, then why post it on the net? What’s the point? If he were that concerned about who was in this young man’s room, then why didn’t he just knock on the door and ask if he was ok, but not he didn’t. This is homophobia, nothing more. They can deny it all they want, liars always do, but that’s just what it is.

    From what I heard this morning, the poor man’s family weren’t aware he was gay. They outed him against his will and nobody can say it had nothing to do with him taking his life. I hope they get the maximum jail time without parole. It is a hate crime!

  • Taylor Siluwé

    It’s been a deeply sad week, one which has left me physically drained. But this is the best, most level-headed article I’ve read on the subject thus far:

    Who Killed Tyler Clementi?

  • Georgia

    Dharun Ravi is a sad sack of shit whose own mother would secretly loathe him. Women would shower with rubbing alcohol after brushing shoulders with him. He will never get lay without paying for it or wetting his wick in someone passed out.

    That’s WHY he had the cam set up, before we question why he uploaded it, we must also question why he set it up in the first place. I think it’s bullshit that he didn’t expect anything sexual in the footage. When you ask a roommate to use the room for the night, it’s usually FOR SEX. That’s what Ravi was hoping for, he seem surprised that his roommate was gay, he was expecting to catch his roommate with a pretty girl and masturbate to that.

    Regardless of whether Tyler was gay, Ravi intends and did /violate/ his sexual integrity…it’s just, not knowing Tyler was gay, Ravi was actually hoping to violate the sexual integrity of a GIRL.

    I hope he get prison time. Nudes are available everywhere on the Internet, people who spy on women do it for the thrill of violation, and have a high tendency to move onto to exposure and/or skip right to rape. They are fucking losers who don’t know how to ask women out and have to get their reactions from violation instead. Jail this loser and let bubba have him.

  • Hyhybt

    @Cam: Well, that depends: nobody likely would be calling for him to be treated as a murderer, either.

    Back to the article: how could anyone have made the comparison with a public musical performance, much less expected *anyone,* even the most anti-gay, to accept it? How is being OK with the world seeing you, presumably fully-clothed, singing or playing an instrument in public even REMOTELY comparable to having your supposedly private sex acts broadcast?

  • edgyguy1426

    @Taylor Siluwé: Taylor I hear ya. I read the comments and was going to make a statement, but where does one even start over there??

  • edgyguy1426

    I guess the privacy crime isn’t that big but if these kids DID actually see jail time in their future, I foresee them fleeing the country. Wouldn’t you? They will probably be regaled as martyrs in onther countries.

  • Mysanthropic Destiny

    I read about things like this; such destructive results born, not of hatred, but pure indifference and apathy. How does anyone have hope for anything in the world, let alone America?

    Hell, I’m not a kid, but I am closeted. If events such as these give me pause I can’t even imagine what it must be doing to the GBLT youth..

  • D Friend

    @Tommy: The general consensus among Dharun’s friends as well as the rest of his school is that he was wrong to invite people to view the second encounter, but the charges of being a homophobe are too extreme.

  • Drew

    @jason: Fortunately, this trend is not true of most university students. I just recently graduated and have never once experienced homophobia from anyone even close to my age. My campus may have had a few homophobes, but they were the ones in the closet. Things ARE getting better and progress IS being made. This may not be the last suicide of its kind, and he will not be the last boy to suffer such torments, but we can have hope that more and more of us will be well-treated like I was.

  • ewe

    Invasion of Tyler Clementi’s privacy is the only evil deed that occurred. Case closed. I don’t care if Ravi is a nice guy or not. Plenty of nice people commit illegal criminal acts.

  • jj

    At the age of 18, Dharun is probabaly extremely naive and if someone asks to have your room for themselves for the night when you would rather chill in your room, you would probably be upset. Unfortunatly, he decided to make a spectacle of his room-mate. I don’t believe that he thought his room-mate would commit suicide. This is just a sad situation all around.

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  • yckick yack


  • yckick yack



    What Ravi did was immature, disrespectful, and cruel. No denying it was douche bag behavior. That being said, I can not see how this can automatically be assumed to be a “hate crime” because Clementi was gay.

    Have there been reports of Ravi calling his roommate names? Did he tweet about his “faggot” roommate? Have there been reports of Ravi bullying and teasing and harassing Clementi for weeks on end? Clementi himself doesn’t allude to any such things in own online posts.

    If Clementi were straight and had invited and older woman over (a Dominatrix) who proceeded to dress him in diapers, whip him, collar, him, gag him, etc., I believe that would of been just as “provocative” to the immature, 18 year old Ravi. I believe that same “douche bag” behavior would of been applied.

    Now would that be a “hate crime” against the hetero-sexual S&M community?

    Many things about this tragedy don’t add up to me, especially after reading Clementi’s own (alleged) comments posted on a gay
    chat site called JustUsBoys.

    Ravi and his friend did should be punished, because such behavior shouldn’t be tolerated (even if it was done with comic effect in “American Pie”). However, the assumption of “hate crime” seems to me to be simply a knee-jerk reaction and not one based on evidence.

    Regardless of who did what and why, Clementi’s family and friends have my condolences.

  • da

    cit2mo [email protected]ewe: That is if the invasion of privacy in dorm is a criminal act. Rutger’s says it will expel you. State says you will get 5 years. The room was shared, so roommate discontent at being constantly asked to vacate must be taken into account.

  • da

    @edgyguy1426: I am indian in USA and i still see this as Tyler’s fault for all the emotional charge associated with incident. Ravi should get community service, end of story.

  • da

    Btw Tyler was alright the second time Ravi tried to film him. He probably didnt get a room reassignment or his partner dumped him, thats why he jumped off

    Search google for “cit2mo gawker” for Tyler’s own words on what happened and why he was so happy until the last moment.

  • ewe

    @yckick yack: You need to calm down and read what i wrote. I am all for punishing these two brats who thought nothing of this young mans privacy. But apparently unlike you, i happen to think that it is equally disgraceful to post anyone of any orientation having sex online without their consent. This goes way beyond a gay issue. They are morally responsible for his death but not legally unfortunately. Face that very sad fact and move forward to help others.

  • ewe

    @da: Well you feel that way because you are an Indian as you say and obviously incapable of being objective. Community service MAY have been an option if Tyler was still alive. Since he is not alive, Ravi will serve time. Not enough in my opinion. I think he should be hung out to dry as an example for everyone. Unfortunately the law will only allow a maximum sentence not nearly justified considering the final result of this spectacle whether intended or not. A spectacle began by Ravi. He should be afforded no compassion.

  • ewe

    @da: No you are “probably” wrong again. There are laws about copyright infringement and since this originated from his own room, he emotionally went into a crisis that resulted in his suicide ALL because of Ravi and Molly and the fact they illegally invaded his personal space.

  • Rob Moore

    @Cam: The same could be said of a driver who is impaired from using alcohol or drugs and kills someone. If that was a valid defense even George Bush could claim he just made a foolish choice to invade Iraq.

  • Rob Moore

    @SJYNYC: I have to agree with you on this. Nothing in the postings I saw indicated a hate crime in my opinion; nonetheless, the die is cast and the bell cannot be unrung. Ravi is most likely filled with regret and some shame, at least, I hope he is feeling these things. The loss of a life, however unintentional, must exact a considerable price, but I don’t see evidence to support a more sinster intent such as a hate crime. What a mess he has made of Tyler’s short life, his friend Molly’s life, and his life.

  • Taylor Siluwé

    @Rob Moore: True, although whether or not they find evidence of Ravi having a history of animus toward gay people, the violation of privacy alone was a felony warranting a jail sentence. That fact that it led to a death should send him to jail without leniency.

    Community service (as someone suggested) would be a slap in the face of justice.

  • ewe

    @Rob Moore: There most certainly is sinister intent. If not, then where is Ravi’s own webcam sexcapades for all the world to see him naked with another guy on display? If it is no big deal to him or anyone reading this then just post it online. I wish the double standards would stop now.


    The entire thing does not add up. Big gaps are missing and the chain of events makes no sense. Coupled with all the talk of gay teen suicide recently, is it possible that major assumptions are being made on why and how things played out? Is there a small, tiny chances that may be the case?

    First of all, Clementi himself states he is pretty sure his roommate could of ONLY seen him kissing his “gentle caller” because the angle of the web cam could not of captured much more. Ravi himself seems to acknowledge this by tweeting “Saw my roommate KISSING another guy”. No mention of sex. I’m pretty sure if Ravi had seen/recorded something that night, he would made use of it then and there, or at least MENTION he saw more than kissing.

    A few days later when the “gentlemen caller” swung by for another booty call, Clementi states (on JustUsBoys) that he noticed the webcam was on pointing towards his bed, he then disconnected the webcam, disconnected wires, and unplugged the pc. He even states he searched the room to be extra sure. Then he and his guest went about their business. (Personally, I find it weird that he would have the guest back so soon, if at all, in his dorm, after knowing about the cam the first time, but that is irrelevant, I guess. Then again, maybe NOT. Who was this guest? Someone so special they get reinvited over again just days later? A boyfriend? Someone who could BROKEN UP WITH Clementi?)

    So.. unless Ravi had some very high tech, ultra modern spy devices, AND and extra pc, exactly when did he record and/or stream his roommate’s intimate act? His tweet suggested people tune in to his cam between certain hours… but Clementi had disabled the cam and pc… and if the intimate act WAS streamed or recorded somehow, you would think there would images, snippets, or stills of the act somewhere out there on the web.. yet, as far I know… none are to be found. (doesn’t mean there aren’t any…. I just haven’t seen any.. and how hard could it be?). And as far I know, no one, even anonymously, has claimed/bragged about having seen anything and stuff like that is hard to keep secret on a college campus. Is the streaming/recording a FACT… or an assumption? (I really can’t tell by news coverage, they seem to be offering editorials and commentary, not details/facts). We know that the ATTEMPT at streaming/recording is a fact.

    None of Clementi’s post on JustUsBoys seem overly angry, pissed, or even embarrassed. He went to the RA to hand in a room change request just HOURS before he jumped. SOMETHING ELSE HAD TO OF HAPPENED THAT VERY DAY.

    He was upset about the streaming/recording? When was it made? He disabled the pc the 2nd time and 1st time the cam only caught them kissing (Ravi’s own tweet confirms this).

    He was upset about being “outed”? His facebook profile quoted Broadway musicals, and he ask him roommate for several hours of “alone time” with an “older gentlemen” on more than one occasion. Seems like a closet with no door.

    He was upset because the RA said he can’t change rooms? The RA couldn’t of told him that, it is not the RA’s decision to make. Even if it where, that is hardly a reason to jump off a bridge.

    Unless I am missing some major facts (and I easily could be), none of this makes sense and everyone’s conclusions seem to based on assumptions, and fuzzy details (and reinforced by the recent suicides of other gay teens).

  • Tracy

    @me: Dharun Ravi’s info… according to online searchable “white pages”:

    Dharun Ravi
    1 Cottonwood Court
    Plainsboro, NJ 08536

    Feel free to let he and his family know how much you respect them. What an upstanding guy Dharun is. GAG.


    @Taylor Siluwé: This going to sound “cold hearted” and I’m sure many won’t want to hear it, but why should one person be held responsible for the actions of another?

    Yes, I can see how weeks, months or years of constant bullying and harassment could push a person to snap or into a deep state of hopelessness.

    There are gay men who would of sued Ravi (and got college money!).

    There are gay men who would “hide in a corner” for few days out of shame or embarrassment (but not kill themselves).. then get on with their lives.

    There are gay men who would burn dvd copies of the alleged recording themselves, and sell them on their own website!

    And yes, there are gay men who would but their foot so far up Ravi’s a** it would have to be surgically removed.

    Clementi was a gay man who chose to… kill himself? In no way am I belittling his humiliation… but there HAS to be someone besides me who thinks his actions were a little… over the top. Yes, I know, I sound “cold hearted”, but I”m not. I’m just not letting my OWN baggage (and we ALL have baggage) “over heat” me.

    I’m sorry, either we are missing a HUGE piece of the puzzle, or there were underlying issues already troubling Clementi. In that case, how MUCH of blame falls on others? It would be just folly or wishful thinking to say ALL of it.

    Clementi could of channeled righteous anger or succumb to crushing hopelessness. He seems to have picked the latter. Why are we so quick and comfortable blaming that choice on others, when it is ours and ours alone?

    Ok.. feel free to “boo” me now.

  • Taylor Siluwé

    No. 92 · Tracy

    I admit I tried to find so online sleaze that this Ravi guy had gotten into (most guys his age have done something) and then I would have posted it on my blog to see how much he’d like his little pickle dangled before the world, but this address stuff I have a slight problem with.

    What if some enraged psycho goes there and does harm to this guy or his family? Who would be responsible for inciting that?

    No. 93 · SJYNYC

    Of course there is more to Clementi’s mental state that we may never know. And yes, taking a header off that bridge is way over the top in my estimation. Ironically, I was just on the GWB that very weekend for a photoshoot. Another friend present was afraid of heights and I kidded him endlessly about it. So, yes, that’s way extreme for me. If I were gonna off myself a handful of pills would be my method.

    Bottomline, we can’t know another’s mental state, which is why we shouldn’t play vicious pranks or mind games on them. The outcome is always uncertain.

  • ewe

    @Tracy: That’s not right Tracy. Are your parents responsible for you posting that information? Shall we tell everyone to harass your parents for you anything you do? Not to mention you could very well be arrested for a crime if you harass people over the phone or through the mail. You are letting this get the better of you and i suggest you slow down and calm yourself.

  • robert in nyc

    Why on earth did Ravi use a computer in his female friend’s room to view what was going on in his own room? What was the purpose and what was the intent? Why would he be doing it anyway? Was it prurient interest, was it perhaps antigay bias? Its hard to tell at this point. Has he viewed anyone else in their rooms? If not, then that suggests that Tyler was a specific target. Why all of a sudden single hime out, assuming he was the only one? If I had been concerned about the safety and security of my dorm room mate, knowing that he or she were entertaining a guest while I had been asked to make myself scarce for a few hours, I would have simply knocked on the door without going in and just called out if everything was ok. What Ravi did was tantamount to actually entering his room without knocking. No respect, no manners a reflection of a bad upbringing perhaps. Actions have consequences, clearly he acted wrecklessly and irresponsibly. He deserves no leniency whatsoever. I have no sympathy or compassion for him. Throw the book at him and his accomplice.

  • jr

    Ravi is an asshole, who was acting like an asshole! Wei should have had the sense to tell Ravi what he was doing was wrong.She should have made him stop. It is a shame that Clementi could not see this crime for what it was, stupid and hurtful, but not the end of the world. He was embarrassed and humiliated by what those two jerks did. I think he would be humiliated even if it was a women in bed with him. They should throw the book at both Ravi and Wei. They have brought shame to their families and the University. Anyone who defends either one of them should be shot for being a idiot, useless to society. There is nothing to defend, what they did is inexcusable. It wasn’t funny, it was no joke and the consequences are real life consequences no slap on the wrist for this. They didn’t do something to themselves they caused the death if a young man with a family and a future.It is sad!


  • reason

    What Ravi did was absolutely wrong, and way over the top. Anyone that actually makes it to college, and most that don’t would know that broadcasting someones sexual life gay or straight would be extremely humiliating. The suicide is not good for anybody, and the majority of the GBLT truly know that the blame doesn’t just reside on Ravi shoulders alone. He happened to be the guy that added the weight that broke the camels back, but that camels back had been thrashed time after time by society. I doubt many people in here can point to one person for their personal suffering, their is a number of people public and private that created the atmosphere that put him on that bridge on a cool Wednesday night. Pointing at Ravi and putting all the blame on him is a tragic mistakes that lets all the other people that have practiced and preached hatred from pulpits, congressional seats, and dining room tables spanning the south Florida coast to Cape Flattery Washington. As if Ravi is some cruel outlier to the rule that did something crazy and got what he deserved, he is not, there is millions of people that are equally culpable. They are equally responsible for making gays feel unwanted and hate life. This suicide has a lifetime of mothers and fathers alongside Ravi.

  • Vanita

    Read the Book Same-Sex Love in India, and you will learn a little more about the history of same-sex sexuality in India. India and Pakistan are not the same at all. An Indian court overturned the anti-sodomy law last year and India has an open vibrant LGBT movement. India is a secular democracy (with a homophobic right wing and lots of homophobic people, just like the US but also a strong gay-friendly media) and Pakistan is an Islamic country claiming to follow the Sharia.

  • Deserie

    <Your Parents must be sooooooo proud of you!!!!!
    I hope you never have children, To think you can pass on all your hatred is scary beyond belief.

  • ammymous

    Think Pink Cloud

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