Straight Up Ratchet

Find Out What These Broke Straight Boys Are Willing To Do For TV Stardom

If you were dying for a reality show featuring guys who have gay sex on camera while clinging desperately to a “straight” identity, then you’re in luck!

The masterminds behind the porn site (NSFW, of course) have decided to use their considerable financial clout to give you liquor-fueled rants and arguments “an uncensored look into the lives” of the men who’ve made a career out of becoming “models” for the site.

Casual racism, binge drinking, hookups and other cringeworthy reality TV tropes are readily available in the two-minute trailer (which is somewhat SFW by the way), but we’d be lying if we said that this wasn’t somehow intriguing.

We’re not sure if this has been picked up by a network or yet another case of a trailer being dropped online to create buzz in hopes of getting picked up by a network. If it has, we’ll be tuning in if only for the mess factor, which looks very, very high.

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    Ashamed to say I would watch this — for dude @1:52 (Jimmy?).

    Education muthafuckin wasted :/

  • Stache99

    Sigh.. I just don’t get off watching guys so completely not into it. That is if they’re really straight. A phenomena I’ll just never understand.

  • MarionPaige

    OMG, can there really be someone in gay adult with a fucking clue? I have always said that gay adult content will skyrocket once the brain dead fucks currently producing gay adult die off. Who needs a “network” when you have people willing to pay for content? Comcast is pretty much handing out networks to minority content producers (OMG, I just alerted Queerty to the fact that Comcast is required to enable x number of minority owned newtorks – What have I done? Run for the hills, there could actually be a GayCities Network OMG!).

  • Pistolo

    I’m sorry, I have ZERO interest in guys who talk about banging other guys like they’re going to a 9-5. It’s heinously unsexy and it just totally erodes their franchise, as soon as I hear a guy is just basically a sociopath whose impression of sex is so devoid and depressing he doesn’t care who it’s with, I can’t say I really enjoy their work. It’s just very bleak. The allure of Broke Straight Boys is that they’re desperate and repressed and succumbing to their desires, not that they actually ARE straight. Jeez.

    And some of these guys, like that Denver guy, if they’re actually trying to convince us they’re straight I won’t be able to tune in because it’s just sad. You don’t passionately suck a dick like that with a full hard-on time and time again and not at least be bisexual.

    • Stache99

      @Pistolo: What’s even more sad is the owner of this franchise is getting rich off of it bragging about the multi million dollar value of his house.

  • MarionPaige

    considering most of the 16 year old girl bullshit that passes for Gay Media these days, maybe a GayCities network wouldn’t be all that bad.

    in re Robert Rodriguez’ El Rey Network: “The network itself—headquartered in Rodriguez’s Austin—was the creation of a quirk in the Federal Communications Commission’s conditions for the merger of NBCUniversal and Comcast, along with several other cable channels. Of the group, El Rey is far and away the highest-profile, and the slickest”

  • bigrawtop

    @bigrawtop: On another board, some responders said they recognized some of the guys as gay people they know.

    • Stache99

      @bigrawtop: This is nothing new. Anyone remember bait bus?. It was nothing but gay or bi guys pretending to be a pissed off straight guy. There’s a whole bunch of them now.

  • litper

    None of these boys are 100% straight. Enough with this 1950s bull!

  • Chris

    The interesting thing about this show is that it tries to give us a look into the world of “straight” guys who do porn and how it’s produced. Doesn’t matter if they’re really straight or not, most of these guys live straight lives so how does that work with their wives and girlfriends. That’s what I wanna see.

    Also, how do their families deal with what they do? I would kick my kid’s butts if they ever went into porn. Whether they’re really straight or not is the last thing on my mind. This can really mess with your life. How do they deal with that?

  • miamibob6969

    I don’t believe for 1 minute that any so called straight guy is going to perform oral sex on another man or let a man do anal to them if they are “straight”. They are either gay or at least bi and that is there way of dealing with it. Sure most straight guys will let a gay guy give them oral but to do it back takes like I said a gay or at least BI man.

  • enlightenone

    A train wreck! Exploitation unbound. Let’s not post that they are legal age please, so not the point.

  • JimboinLA

    I never thought the ‘Broke’ in ‘Broke Straight Boys’ referred to their finances.

  • jonasalden

    My favorite ones weren’t in the trailer! No Rex? No Adam? Spencer? Darren? And of course, Sam? And Damien really disappointed me with all that race talk. But then again, Queerty did warn me of general ratchet-ness. Oh well, I’m hooked. Goodbye “Made In Chelsea.” So long, “Mythbusters.” I’m joking. I’d rather just watch the sex and have them keep their confessions to themselves. They’re more interesting that way. Not everthing needs to be a reality to show (I’m looking at you, “Made In 12.”

  • Aromaeus

    I’ve seen Kaden Alexander’s scenes and if he’s straight he should get a damn award for his acting because they guy can take and suck a mean d!ck

  • Billy Budd

    They are bisexuals.

  • Lvng1tor

    I just threw up a bit in my mouth…..

  • michael mellor

    This reminds me of the age-old practice of women pretending to be lesbians so as to titillate straight-identifying guys.

  • James Hart

    They’re straight??? If you believe that then I have a bridge I’d like to sell you in Brooklyn.

  • crowebobby

    I’ve watched the Internet site a few times because some of the guys really do look pretty straight, especially the hustler types (which is a turn-on for me), until they start swopping spit, giving head with techniques that are new to me after 60 years of getting and giving it, and then take a really thick 10 incher without so much as a grunt. Could a straight guy (especially one with a drug habit) get so hard up and hungry he’d blow someone or grit his teeth and bend over? It has happened, believe me, but they don’t do it with kind of the relish these “straight” guys manage.

  • MarionPaige

    Alas, White Queens are losing the battle to keep dick sucking and butt sexing proprietary. “Straight” Men can apparently do “gay” without that special combination of gay genes and Seth Rogen makes better gay porn that the gay porners. It’s like, It’s like … You know what? It’s like this claim that “gay” is some kind of near extinction species that needs legislative protection is all just so much bullshit.

    • Stache99

      @MarionPaige: Are you not getting enough attention troll?

  • yupwhatever

    @crowebobby: Correct me if I am wrong but are you saying it’s not a turn on for you unless these “straight” boys show some discomfort during sex? Just to prove that they are truly straight?

    It kind of reminds me of this one commenter on a gay porn site who said that he does not watch gay-for-pay porn anymore simply because he doesn’t believe that they are really straight (well d’uh), so he watches straight porn (gross) so he can get his “straight guy” fix.

    I dunno, I just find that weird. Then again, that whole straight obsession is completely lost on me. I don’t care how hot he is, once I find out he’s into ladies, I lose interest. I also don’t buy the b.s. of straight guys in gay porn. You are at least bi, especially after you’ve done it for like the 20th time.

  • enlightenone

    @yupwhatever: Even after the first time, you use up your “straight, but curious/bi-curious” card! Right?

  • TnTUAZ

    Straight schmaight..who cares any more?

  • Geeker

    Aren’t there enough dumb whores willing to do anything for money on tv as it is?

    • enlightenone

      @Geeker: “Aren’t there enough dumb whores willing to do anything for money on tv as it is?

      Prostitution is the world’s oldest “profession” and is legal again, but now you can be a celebrity now and make millions if you are one of the “lucky few,” or at least have fans on YouTube or a reality show like Big Brother or a “C” rate movie. And if you are business minded, you could even sale your own lube, sex toys, dildos, etc. (See Marc Dylan, porn sex worker); even I was stunned!

  • Soldier_Medic


    I love this line.

    I’ve only watched a total of 5 reality shows in my life. I saw it on HERE! TV with a friend and it intrigued me 5 episodes. I was like, Meh….

    I must admit, it wasn’t the typical set up I expected. There was no bitchy, fighting.

    The set up:

    You have most of these guys are from the South. Most of it comes across as typical reality TV. E.g., do you really expect me to believe this?

    I kinda felt for the one guy who said he did the porn for his family who is poor. Maybe cuz I’m from the south, or I’ve heard guys in social services tell me the same thing, I maybe fell for it NOT).

    Since LOGO got bought out and globed into this cable mess , HERE! is the ONLY gay themed channel out there.

    Having said that, what I didn’t like was the constant theme you keep hearing the guys say “This is the last thing I would ever do.”, Kids don’t try this at home”, I can’t believe I get paid to f^ck dudes like women. ”

    I wanna scream at them like the few veterans who “claim they did the same thing when they lived on the street. THEN BITCH DON’T DO IT!!! Join the military, go to school or ask for public assistance or something if sucking a d!ck is so demeaning.”

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