We’ve all been there.
It’s been a long weekend of partying in New York. You’re on your last bottle of booze, empty baggies litter the floor and you realize you’re a bit hard up on cash for the next round, let alone what you owe the surely charming escort next to you.
So you do what any international playboy with deep, deep family pockets would — fake your own kidnapping, of course! It’s really so simple, and you should have that $10k ransom in no time.
If that plan strikes you as, oh we don’t know — off — in any major or minor way, congratulations, you aren’t a complete fool.
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Related: Republican Lawmaker Fakes His Own Gay Sex Scandal To Hide Real Sex Scandal, Fails
The same cannot be said of 39-year-old Italian heir to the Fiat automobile fortune, Lapo Elkann, who ended up in this self-inflicted predicament with a 29-year-old “friend” in NY public housing, after a two-day bender.
When his funds ran dry, Elkann called up relatives and said a woman was holding them hostage. He “would be hurt” if 10k wasn’t sent immediately, he pleaded with his family.
His family, in turn, called NYPD. After what we can only assume was a brief investigation, Elkann was charged with filing a false police report and ordered to appear before a criminal court for arraignment.
Related: Calum McSwiggan Misses L.A. Court Summons For Faking Hate Crime; Instagrams From Spain Instead
Elkann posted an Instagram video six days ago saying he was embarking on a trip abroad to gather ideas for his business.
“I will be visiting many different countries because there are a lot of projects in development — a lot of new ideas I will be soon showing to you,” Elkann said in the video. “I will be seeing many very interesting characters in the creative field and the entrepreneurial field in the next few days.”
Elkann has a long, troubled past with drug and alcohol abuse, which is no laughing matter. But we expect his wealth and privilege will see him bounce back from this in no time.
And so the world turns…
Prax07
Lmao…this guy is an idiot
Alistair Wiseman
Please do your “projects in development” in another country. We are full up of your kind here in the U.S.
Billy Budd
He will go back to rehab and then later will be freed to start all over again. To sin again with call boys, drugs and booze.
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“….I should have known you’d know where to find the boys and the booze …”
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IN NY City!
ingyaom
“Fiat fortune”? I thought they went bankrupt.
ErikO
This sounds like the plot from that boring and overrated book by Larry Kramer from the 70s.
ErikO
Larry Kramer is batshit crazy and not any sort of hero or ally to the LGBT community or even rich white gay men, or Jews.
Kangol
@ErikO: Larry Kramer didn’t like to include the projects or the people (of any race) who lived in them. So Lapo Elkann’s a druggy, he likes “trade,” he went on a bender and ended up without more money to buy drugs and sex, and staged a kidnapping. Uh, no, Signora Cosa (Miss Thing). Take that mess somewhere else, and no arrivederci either!