Queerty is better as a member

Log in | Register
  pleasuring devices

Ancient Fire Tool Or 8,000-Year-Old Dildo?

Archaeologists digging at a Mesolithic site in Motala, Sweden, uncovered a phallic instrument (pictured, above and below) estimated to be from 4,000-6,000 B.C.E., though they’re unsure whether it’s a tool used “to chip flakes of flint” or, well, you know.

There’s actually an even older maybe-dildo discovered. Back in 2005, a penis-like stone object was recovered in Germany that’s about 28,000 years old.

By:           JD
On:           Jul 22, 2010
Tagged: , , ,

  • 16 Comments
    • EdWoody
      EdWoody

      Wrong pic.

      Jul 22, 2010 at 1:31 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Miguel
      Miguel

      You just don’t get their humor.

      Jul 22, 2010 at 1:47 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Cam
      Cam

      Remember, scientists used to claim that two female chimps rubbing their genitals together for a while and screeching must be engaging in some form of “Greeting”. Scientists will avoid classifying anything as sexual if they possibly can.

      Jul 22, 2010 at 2:00 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Mike L.
      Mike L.

      Uh those are some disgustingly dirty nails.

      Jul 22, 2010 at 2:53 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Samwise
      Samwise

      If it is a penis (and it definitely looks like one), it’s interesting that it’s circumcised. Did circumcision in Sweden go back that far? I thought it was mostly a Jewish thing until the 20th century or so. (Could be wrong.)

      Jul 22, 2010 at 2:55 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • B
      B

      I’ve got that beat: http://www.panoramio.com/photo/22451917 has a picture of a formation in the Pinnacles National Monument (a few of hours drive south of San Francisco) nicknamed “The Unmentionable” and it is a lot older than 28,000 years.

      Jul 22, 2010 at 3:22 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
      PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS

      ezee, those must have been very trying times for size queens……. :-p

      Jul 22, 2010 at 3:50 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Mike L.
      Mike L.

      @B: So all along this has been father earth not mother earth?! Facepalm lol

      That is a huge stiff ^_^

      Jul 22, 2010 at 3:51 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Charlie Jackpot
      Charlie Jackpot

      What a tiny dildo

      Jul 22, 2010 at 5:21 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jon (not that one)
      Jon (not that one)

      @Mike L.: Archaeologists sift dirt for a living . .If they’re not nasty like that you’re not worthy of the term Archaeologist.

      But then two problems with this finding. #1 it’s cut. #2 it’s hillarious.

      I don’t think “fire tool” makes the cut.

      Jul 22, 2010 at 5:25 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Hilarious
      Hilarious

      Uh yep, that’s a dick. Doesn’t take a scientist to see that.

      Jul 22, 2010 at 8:29 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Ogre Magi
      Ogre Magi

      Makes ya wonder what Fred and Barney were really up to?

      Jul 22, 2010 at 9:39 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Lucas
      Lucas

      Something tells me penises weren’t circumcised back in the day.

      Jul 22, 2010 at 10:09 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
      PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS

      @Ogre Magi: Maybe they were actually sham marriages! Betty and Wilma the first liprock Lesbians!!!

      Jul 23, 2010 at 10:24 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • t money
      t money

      foreskin rolls back. especially when hard. so the circumcision comments dont hold water. it can very well be a phaillic totem. an erect one. just like all the venus totems. they are more abstract. they should swab it. see what they find. metallic/rock material or human “material”

      Jul 23, 2010 at 2:51 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • eagledancer
      eagledancer

      American Indian here–

      A) Is it “A” or “B?” Traditional people tend to very practical and a tool could be used for more than task. When I used to do lectures on cross-cultural sexuality and show a lot of slides (lots of pre-columbian representations of the Penis) some of the California Native women came up to me and explained sometimes the “poles” they used to pound acrons (into a sort of “pudding”–for a non-native image think of a butter churn) were also used as pleasure devices.

      B) The Native American objects (often of stone)also look “cut” at first glance. As an earlier poster pointed out, an erect penis won’t tend to show a foreskin–think also of the limitations of the medium…how much detail can you put into an antler (which is the substance of the Swedish object)with what’s available to you thousands of years ago? I should also mention an artist usually works with what’s available. The Swedish piece is antler, and there are simple physical restrictions in terms of how large a round piece of antler can be.
      lol–not all art was meant to be “life-size.” Perhaps this was a scale model. Maybe a much larger piece was made but we no longer have access to the hypothetical larger one–because that one was worn out :D

      Jul 25, 2010 at 1:05 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

    Add your Comment

    Please log in to add your comment

    Need an account? Register It's free and easy.



  • POPULAR ON QUEERTY

    FOLLOW US
     



    GET QUEERTY'S DAILY NEWSLETTER


    FROM AROUND THE WEB

    Copyright 2014 Queerty, Inc.
    Follow Queerty at Queerty.com, twitter.com/queerty and facebook.com/queerty.