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Homographic: Queerty’s Gay Film Generator

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Ever thought, “Hey, I could make a gay movie!”? Well, now you can, with Queerty’s patented gay film generator, which distills three decades of cinematic achievement into one easy to use chart.

 

Make Your Own Gay Movie

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By:           Japhy Grant
On:           Feb 4, 2009
Tagged: , , , , , ,

  • 12 Comments
    • m2mswva
      m2mswva

      That’s the cast from “Too Wong Foo…” not “Priscilla”

      Feb 4, 2009 at 9:58 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Japhy Grant
      Japhy Grant

      @m2mswva: Yup. Which ruined the plot of “Priscilla, Queen of the Desert.” See, it’s like– a joke.

      Feb 4, 2009 at 10:02 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • REBELComx
      REBELComx

      An interesting night at my place is to watch “Too Wong Foo…” and then “Blade” immediately after. You cannot possibly keep a straight face through either…especially the latter.

      Feb 4, 2009 at 10:20 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Kid A
      Kid A

      Haha, I was waiting for Boy Culture, and it was right at the bottom.

      Feb 4, 2009 at 10:35 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • alan brickman
      alan brickman

      where’s the part of the generator that says..”gay dies at end of film so straight people who saw it can say they cried…and won’t feel too threatened?” Seriously all the important gay films have the ending “the only good fag is the dead fag.” Can they make a gay film where the main character actually lives????

      Feb 4, 2009 at 12:18 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Cam
      Cam

      You forgot to add that for major distribution all the actors have to be straight, and they HAVE to go on an interview and say…..

      1. Oh, well it wasn’t weird playing gay, and I mean if I was gay I would totally want to sleep with “Insert co-star” because they are just so amazing.

      2. If they are a woman playing a lesbian remember that they have to state “WEll I think that most people are a little bit bi-sexual, and I certainly can see why people think “Insert name of older semi-has-been actress” is sexy, it’s something about confidence” before saying “But I’m totally hetrosexual.

      3. They have to applaud how open and welcoming hollywood is to allow a film like this to be made. WARNING, they have to do this with NO sense of irony, and must pretend that they are unaware of the unofficial policy that explicitly forbid hiring any out gay actors for the movie.

      Feb 4, 2009 at 1:16 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • amajenn
      amajenn

      I keep making The Crash Pad … what am I doing wrong? *grin*

      And Alan Brickman – I feel ya man. They keep killing lesbians too. Either that or one of em turns out to be straight.

      It’s ewwgy. But you DO know that “gay” is the new “retard,” right?

      If you’ve seen Tropic Thunder you’ll know what I’m talking about. The Hanks/Penn phenomenon is incredibly comparative. Hoffman won an Oscar for Tootsie, after all ;)

      Feb 4, 2009 at 6:42 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • amajenn
      amajenn

      Pardon – Hoffman was nominated.

      Not quite the same diff :)

      Feb 4, 2009 at 6:44 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Jim
      Jim

      What, no “It’s My Party”?

      Feb 4, 2009 at 9:16 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • newyorkboy
      newyorkboy

      sad but true

      Feb 4, 2009 at 11:31 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • rick
      rick

      i loved to, wong foo. i liked priscilla. i loved beautiful thing. that is it for gay movies and me. still haven’t watched brokeback mountain. i only bought it because i found it at wal mart.

      Feb 5, 2009 at 12:22 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Me
      Me

      @Cam: Nail On The Freakin Head! But please… no more flow charts, Queerty. I see enough at work. :-(

      Feb 5, 2009 at 6:45 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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