You donât have to be a TV actress or a daytime talk show host to live in an incredibly fabulous house, but it sure helps. Ellen Degeneres and Portia Di Rossi have decided to sell their palatial Beverly Hills compound for the completely reasonable price of $60 million. But before you scoff at the price tag, just look at everything youâll get.
A pool with deck platforms, a perfectly manicured lawn, and lounging chairs make for ideal summer relaxation when the hounds at the TV studio have been barking all day. Throw in an additional $50 or $60 thousand and get your very own pool jockey wearing whatever kind of uniform you like. âWeâd like another clean towel and a mojito, darling. Thereâs a good girl.â
The game room features high ceilings, natural light, and creepy portraits. But donât worryâEllen has drawn mustaches on every one so you can laugh at them rather than out of fear. Plus, the game room contains rustic-style wood furnishing for that authentically lesbian touch.
Now every meal can happen outdoors with this naturally lit cooking area complete with grill and woodfire oven. What will it be tonight, ladies? Grilled foie gras or three-cheese pizza fiesta nachos?
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
A beautiful bonzai, hanging lanterns, lavish rugs, and comfortable couch make this the perfect patio for a sensuous evening at home with your special lady friend or a perfect dramatic backdrop for when you announce that youâre leaving her for another special lady friend.
And when the unbearable lightness of lesbianism has become too much, escape into this meditative pond of wonders. Let the moistened lily pads and croaking bull frogs remind you of the happiness that awaits inside of you.
christopher di spirito
El and Portie will NEVER sell this property at $60 million.
It’s overpriced. The comps don’t support the listing price.
steve
What recession?
There are people living in houses worth 60 million dollars! What a waster of money
patrick L
60 million is ridiculous! Nothing is worth that much in LA or anywhere. Did anyone see that horror of a new show on Bravo last night? Those absurd nauseating LA decorators? It was too awful to watch. Even my cat threw up.
Sceth
The captions add nothing to the pics.
ewe
eh! it’ll do.
Jeffree
Until Ellen & Portia drop the asking price to $42mm, it’s simply out of my price range. Sorry, ladies, but lets lunch again soon. My place or yours?
DarSco
i thought they were in Santa Barbra? lol its too epensive, well have more $$ in Baracks 2nd term
Spike
Looks like the had a lesbian decorate it.
Jenny
There’s something kind of disgusting about anyone owning a $60 million home when 14 million Americans are jobless.
This is something out of the Gilded Age before Teddy Roosevelt became president.
Robbie K
Rustic furnishings?? more like little house on the prairie just threw up all over
divkid
i wonder if it smells of cats and mung beans, and has elvis jigsaws on the walls.
being friends with lesbians can at times can be a testing experience. but then you need a shelf putting up, or a drain needs unblocking, and you remember why you love them đ
Shannon1981
@divkid: Now now! I do love cats, but don’t have one at the moment. And what are mung beans? And I’m sorry, I cannot unblock a drain unless it involves Drano.
divkid
that arial view of the complex puts me in mind of a bond villain’s secret lair. i shudder to think what evil these two are hatching in there in order to launch at unsuspecting good christian families (yes it will probably contain a feline by-product and possibly mung beans… yikes!!)
@Shannon1981: you UNNATURAL mung bean-refusenik! what next? you don’t own joss sticks? don’t worship the goddess to the spiritual strains of the female orca pod!
tell me you don’t own a tracy chapman track and i WILL HAVE TO turn you in to the authorities.
p.s.. i note you didn’t deny your carpentry skills, so i suspect you’re no stranger to a power toolâŚso if you’ve got a spare hour i’ve got this shelve that needs….
divkid
@divkid: duh! thats: AERIAL view
Shannon1981
@divkid: LOL shelves these days come with directions. I do admit, a woman in a tool belt is a huge turn on though.