Gays reveal the sexiest thing a man has told them after hooking up

The hashtag #ThingsISayAfterSex lit up Twitter several years ago, with users listing funny post-coital comments like “10 points for Gryffindor” and “Like, comment, subscribe.”

And recently, on Reddit, gay men listed the sexiest things other men have told them after the throes of passion.

Highlights from that thread are below—edited for readability and brevity but not necessarily for NSFW-ness.

So maybe you’ll wanna scroll down when the coast is clear!

“I met up with a guy in an Airbnb. He was pretty well hung but so gorgeous, so I went for it. It was painful, but his loving tenderness quickly made that go away and was soon replaced by carnal hunger. My knees dug into the bed, and in the literal heat of the moment, I pulled the sheets, and we both heard them tear. Afterward, when I went home, I felt the need to apologize, since he would have to pay for the linen. He said to me, ‘You didn’t tear them. We did. F*cking.’ I never felt so beautiful or wanted.”

“He said, ‘You have the kind of hole a man can never forget.’ Made me feel like prime rib of the objectified, slutty variety.”

“When my boyfriend says, ‘Nothing makes me feel more masculine than getting f*cked by you. It feels like you’re pumping testosterone into my hole with every thrust.’”

“So, when will I see you again?”

“I met my first boyfriend during uni. We had a pretty slow burn romance. One time I went to his place because we had a uni project to finish. Mid-brainstorming, he decides to kiss me, one thing leads to another, and we end up f*cking. He was pretty rough (I guess because of all the pent-up frustration with how slow things had moved), leaving me completely annihilated. When he finished, I was trying to put my sh*t together when he said, ‘If I had known, I would have done it before.’ And I dunno why, the way he said it always stuck with me.”

“Years ago, I was with this guy. He was amazing in bed. We had done it quite a few times over a few months. One day, after we finished, we were lying there, and he started letting his feelings go. He and I were in the closet, and he told me that he wanted us to be together and that he would come out to his family for me. I thought that was the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me. But I wasn’t willing to come out to mine. And I still haven’t. I stopped seeing him not long after that. Worst mistake of my life. I really cared about him.”

“Do you want to be my boyfriend?”

Related:

Why do I keep apologizing after sex?

“I don’t know why but I get this tremendous sense of guilt.”

“‘I’ve never felt like that before in my life.’ First time an ex-FWB and I had sex. Then we cuddled and had sex again 10 minutes later. That was a good day.”

“‘You were born to suck d*ck.’ I’d never felt so seen.”

“After we spent the night together having fun and talking, one guy did say he wished I could come back home with him. (He was visiting.) He was really sweet, but it wasn’t meant to be.”

“More romantic than sexy, but I remember the time I had really intimate sex with my ex that ended in me saying I love you to him for the first time. We were showering together after, and I broke down crying. It was an emotionally intense experience for me, especially since he was my first sexual partner and first love. I have ADHD and ASD, so it’s really easy for me to get overstimulated, even if it’s a positive experience and especially if it’s a new experience. He stopped me in my tracks and said, ‘Hey, it’s okay. It was an intense experience for you.’ And then just hugged me until it passed. He could’ve made me feel weird or dramatic like so many peers, strangers, and family members have done in the past, but he was calm and understanding and let me feel my feelings.”

We award honorable mentions to these comments that came not after sex but during and before:

“I remember I was dating this boy and we had only started seeing each other. It was the first time he had me over to his apartment for some fun. We smoked some pot and started fooling around. We were just moving in to the penetrative portion of the act when, out of the blue, he decided it was the correct time to say to me, ‘Oh, I forgot to ask! What’s your Chinese zodiac sign?’ It was here that I said, ‘I’m a horse,’ and as I felt the head of my c*ck slide into him, I said, ‘Can’t you tell?’ We laughed the whole way through some amazingly hot sex. It was weirdly perfect. I miss him.”

“I was giving a guy a foot massage with his socks on. He took them off, and when I started rubbing his bare feet, he looked me dead in the eyes and said, ‘Ahhh, skin on skin.’ I don’t know why, but it’s always stuck with me as so sexy.”

“So my first time ever having sex with a man is my current boyfriend. I have always been with women and the sex was ehh. We were watching The Mandalorian and making out, and I just said f*ck it and slid my hands into his pants. I swear to God, this dude looked me dead in my eyes and said, ‘This is the way’ … Honestly, I fell in love with him right there.”

Related:

Older gays tell young’uns what dating & hooking up was like before the apps took over

Before the apps arrived in 2009, gays actually had to leave the house to cruise & meet men. ‘Memba the last call sidewalk sale?