British actor Jonathan Bailey has revealed he had a scary and homophobic encounter whilst buying coffee in Washington, D.C. a few weeks ago.
Bailey, 35, was in D.C. to attend the Human Rights Campaign’s annual gala dinner on October 14th.
“It was an incredible experience,” he told London newspaper The Evening Standard. He said he met President Biden and had the honor of introducing Matt Bomer to the stage to collect an award.
“I had the most amazing night; had a drink; couldn’t sleep; buzzing.
“I woke up the next morning, it was like a montage. Sunshine, I was like, this is brilliant. I went into a coffee shop, and I was wearing a Human Rights Campaign cap from the night before. And the young lady who I was ordering from recognized me from Bridgerton, we were just chatting.
“And a man arrived behind me and he said, ‘Are you famous?’ And I said something like, ‘I’m really famous for ordering coffee,’ which is actually quite an annoying thing to say,” he recalled, laughing.
“Then he got my cap, and he pulled it off my head and he threw it across the room and he said, ‘Get out of this f***ing coffee shop, you queer.”
Threat to shoot
Bailey says the room went quiet. He walked over, picked up his cap and put it on.
“If you don’t take that cap off, I’m gonna f***ing shoot you,” the other man threatened. “Where I’m from, people like me kill people like you.”
“No one knew what to do,” says Bailey. “Apart from one girl, she was amazing. Angela, she came up, and she got her phone out and she said, ‘I’m recording this message, I think you are welcome in this country. And what you’re saying, I think, is appalling.’ That happened sort of five minutes in, and he left.”
Bailey says he asked the man where he was from and he said he was from Pennsylvania.
“Potentially, there is a kid who – that’s his father. That’s his uncle. That’s his teacher.”
Bailey says it took some time for what had happened to sink in. He knew it could have been worse, and even more so for others who are more vulnerable.
“I’ve got friends and security. There are so many people that don’t. They are surrounded by that every day, and the torment of what that must be like, the amount of fear that was generated… If that’s what children are surrounded by, they’re not going to be able to grow in any way.”
Growing up gay in the ’90s
In the interview, Bailey talked at length about being out in the entertainment industry. He welcomes how things have changed and the opportunities for gay actors. However, he also says he realizes that we’re living in scary times.
Both in the US and UK, there has been a rise in LGBTQ+ hate crimes over the last five years. This prompted Bailey to share his story about the coffee shop encounter.
He also talked about dealing with his own internalized shame. Depictions of gay people in the media as a child didn’t help.
“The majority of gay people were either the butt of jokes, or being caught in sexual acts and considered deviants, or they were committing suicide, or they’re dying of AIDS.”
When it comes to his own private life, he’s less vocal. He reveals only that he has “a lovely man” in his life. However, he gives no more details.
“Having a private life is, for me, completely critical. I don’t know if I would be able to be as confident to speak out on other things if I felt that my whole life was up for grabs.”
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CatholicXXX
Jonathan is attractive so nothing else matters
dbmcvey
He’s also a really excellent actor and seems to be a pretty nice guy.
Bill
huh?
dario717
Screw MAGA!
Bosch
Where I’m from, that’s called a ‘death threat’, and it puts you in jail. I can’t believe this kind of behaviour is acceptable in a country that’s meant to be a first world country.
My2CentsWorth
CORRECTION: The U. S. became a first-world nation but it is in the process of no longer being a part of that group. The return of Donald Trump to the role of president will just about result in the U. S. forever exiting the group.
ShaverC
Uhm… This doesn’t sound like something that actually happened.
KissBananaPeels
AGREED…
quantum
I call BS as well. Or at the very least, I don’t think I’m special enough that a crazy person ranting in a Dunkin’ has anything to do with hatecriming me…
ZzBomb
Oh look the serial liar thinks someone is lying b/c they don’t like the story about a right wing fukwit being homophobic.
In other news: Water is wet
dbmcvey
I’ve seen it happen in California and Texas so I have no problem believing it happened in DC.
Mr.Gavin Elster
IF this really DID happen, a police report MUST be filed, and this hate crime, with death threat fully investigated. If not by Bailey, then, by somebody on his behalf. Person “recording this on cell phone,” PLEASE come forward NOW! While many lgbt+ hate crimes go unreported,with the recent Smolette-type incidents (and let’s hope Smolette stays permanently erased!) clearing up any doubt in this serious matter is a priority.
KissBananaPeels
also he and Matt are portraying the white gays that doomed the lives of Black and Hispanic gays during the AIDS crisis and are STILL doing it NOW
THINK ABOUT IT before you get in your feelings
Diplomat
Howso?
dwick
Interesting statement
quantum
@Diplomat,
That calls for a more nuanced discussion platform than the comments section of an entertainment blog.
dbmcvey
You haven’t actually watched this show have you.
THINK ABOUT IT before you blow off about things you’re ignorant of.
nm4047
What? Making any kind of statement like this demands clarification. You maybe one of his supporters, but you’re not Donald Trump and can just say what pops out of your head (or repeat what thoses voice inside your head) say.
Mary Jane
First, I believe him. And yes, the wealthier and mobile good-looking white young guys–who traveled to Africa, came back with the virus, but it was the global religious influence that put most of the gay community in harm’s way, by outlawing the personal and public lives–that were outwardly gay.
True that many white and other race males were influenced by the racism–to keep many minorities in poor neighborhoods, and discriminated in the mostly white bars and clubs. Same way the white feminists would hangout at times and support minority feminists and lesbians, but not when it came to campaigns or even helping many of them to be hired at all-male institutions and jobs across the U.S.
The strong white English rule–was too powerful to fight, but it took many lives and livelihoods to diminish some of the power. Jonathan’s character survived because Matt’s character helped to be able to around people he would never be able to meet.
Their love was well-acted and they showed that both loved each other in their own personal experiences–but the gulf between them was just too deep to keep them together.
I loved both the characters for different reasons–but I was more moved by the Matt character, even if he did more harm to his family and the idealistic guy he fell in love with.
I was also attracted to the actor who played, McCarthy…in his white beater. So many boys, teens, and guys, who had to go in the closet and stay there. Are there many clubs or bars, named the Closet…I want to go there to be with all those guys.
dbmcvey
So we’re just ignoring the characters played by Noah J. Ricketts and Jelani Alladin?
Ronbo
However, this incident pales in comparison to hearing individuals chant “from the river to the sea”. OMG: THE river to THE sea. “S” as in snark.
Now, I’ve attacked my own ancestors using the same language found in Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu’s own right-wing Likud party that actually uses the slogan “from the river to the sea” in its platform!
This story explains the difference between actual hate and victim-claiming.
still_onthemark
(sigh)
Similarly, Americans have used the phrase “from sea to shining sea” for a long time. If a group wanted to take over and destroy the United States, kill all Americans, and rule “from sea to shining sea” instead of Americans, that would seem pretty hostile to rational observers.
dbmcvey
They’re both terrible and have nothing to do with each other.
This is a total bullsh*t smokescreen from Ronbo.
Kangol2
still_onthemark, do not forget that Europeans did wage war against, slaughter, steal from, dispossess, forcibly march, abrogate treaties with, and steal the children of and convert Indigenous people “from sea to shining sea” (Atlantic to Pacific) for hundreds of years to create the United States (and Canada, and all of the Americas, for that matter).
That bit of history–quite a long and ongoing one!–seems to be forgotten, and we haven’t even mentioned the hundreds of years of chattel slavery yet!
still_onthemark
@Kangol2: “That bit of history–quite a long and ongoing one!–seems to be forgotten,…”
Forgotten, really? It’s all we ever hear about the past decade or so. But if you own a house or condo and you want to give it to some Native Americans, nobody is stopping you.
Who was living in what’s now Israel 3,000 years ago? Jews!
Mary Jane
Don’t show hate to our brothers and sisters in Palestine, the U.S. and all of them that had to seek refuge in Western Nations because they wouldn’t be tolerated in the homeland of Palestine, and their fathers, would kill them if they stayed there, so they are forced to go into Israel or West Bank, to hide in world of invisible people.
JOJO
I wouldn’t say it didn’t happen, but in Washington DC? I lived there 10 years ago and know the city pretty well which is why that doesn’t make sense. Even back then that would have been unheard of. There also would have been 5 people calling 911 and the cops would have been there in 10 seconds especially since the guy said “after 5 minutes into it” .
Just hope this isn’t another Jessie Smullet type of thing…
dbmcvey
Yeah, Washington DC. I’ve seen things like this in West Hollywood and Austin, TX so I have not problem believing it.
Also, no one presented this as a crime.
abfab
JOJO. You never lived in DC.
JOJO
You could be as far north as 18th in Adams Morgan or on Florida Ave in Shaw. This is definitely out of the ordinary and extremely rare. Maybe the coffee shop has a basement like a certain pizza joint on M St.
abfab
Again, you are sounding like a child. Rare? Tell the crowd you just fell off the turnip truck. Please. It’s like you have NO IDEA of the situation, past OR present.
My2CentsWorth
It could be true. The hat seems to have clued the nut that the guy was LGBTQ.
dbmcvey
I was in DC not long ago and there was a whole damn KKK/Nazi/MAGA group standing on the mall trying to get people to honk for bigotry.
JOJO
Also, just another thought…there was a mention of cell phone footage. I think that would certainly lend iron clad credibility to the article.
In DC, they have a LGBTQ police liaison department. Reporting that would have been paramount, and they take things like that VERY seriously.
ShaverC
The whole story doesn’t make sense. What the girl said in the cell footage doesn’t make sense either. Like you said police would’ve been called by someone especially after a threat of harm. It reads like a movie…exciting gay-positive night, he’s on an emotional high, then some red-neck makes him realize that there are still obstacle out there for young people.
dbmcvey
And seeing as how Shaver is such an expert in human behavior I could almost care what he thinks.
JOJO
If it happened at night, say at night after the bars closed down, then I would think some idiot out-of -towner wanted to fight, but this was in the morning after.
abfab
dbmcvey……..shaver never makes sense. He’s old and tired.
bachy
If Jonathan Bailey is a lying fraud (?), the reported dialogue would have been more focused, expository, comprehensible. But instead it has the choppy, inelegant quality of a real – and hostile – exchange.
dbmcvey
I love how all the conservative trolls were triggered by this.
I’ve seen this kind of thing in liberal cities before so I have no problem believing it happened in DC.
still_onthemark
Trumpanzees are unpredictable and it’s hard to guess what aspect of REALITY is going to make them explode!
abfab
They really are, mark. They bash the community online and they likely do it on the streets.
tjack47
Oh, I believe it happened. Everyone is fortunate he didn’t have a gun. It’s hatred and ignorance. It happens less now where I live in Texas. It’s now more like, “We’re here. We’re queer. They’re used to it.” That out of blue would be threatening.
nm4047
Would be interesting to get some follow up with anyone that was at this coffee joint. Not too sure JB hasn’t taken a bit of liberty in his telling of the way he dealt with the situation.
ShaverC
I have a hard time believing a homophobic redneck is familiar with the yellow & blue logo of the Human Rights Campaign. It smacks of Jussie and his story when the two “white” guys in Chicago screamed “Hey EMPIRE” and then said, “This is MAGA country”.
abfab
You just have a hard time period.
bachy
If it were a lie, wouldn’t JB have presented his reaction in a better light? Seems like he was just shocked, and froze.
ShaverC
bachy, He doesn’t want to make it sound like he’s fearless because that wouldn’t fit the narrative of being afraid during the “encounter”. It also doesn’t make sense, at least to me, that he didn’t say if he flinched, or moved away when the man went to grab his hat. People react. I believe at least some customers would’ve called the police or interfered. 5 minutes is a long time for people to be “frozen”. I could go on with discrepancies, such a was no one else working at the coffee shop who would’ve called the police? This is DC… why would a homophobic “hick” go into a fancy coffee shop to get a mocha latte, because if this happened at a Dunkin’s it would’ve been in the paper.
dbmcvey
Also interesting because Shaver is having his terrible reactions supposedly in his own home and they’re still terrible.
Also Shaver you dumbass, he never said the guy identified him as gay from the hat. You pulled that out of your own stupid butt.
ShaverC
dbmcvey, Then what about the hat upset the guy so much that he took it off someone’s head and threw it “across the room”?
dbmcvey
Shaver you ignorant slut. The employee recognized him from Bridgerton and they were talking. The redneck asked “are you famous” he joked “I’m famous for ordering coffee” after which the guy realized he was gay and went on a homophobic rant ending in throwing the hat. It had nothing to do with recognizing the logo.
How desperate are you to pretend there are no homophobes out there? Isn’t it bad enough you give cover and comfort to anti-LGBT politicians?
ShaverC
dbmcvey, Read what I wrote. I’m not saying the man would not be homophobic. I’m saying because he’d be antigay, that he wouldn’t know what the Human Right Campaign logo would look like. Jonathan made a point of stating he was wearing the HRC hat he got from the day before, which means the guy pulled the hat off Jonathan’s head knowing what it meant. Just like in Jussie’s “story” the homophobic MAGA men who he claimed beat him up allegedly screamed out “Hey EMPIRE!” in reference to the show he was in… but no homophobe would actually watch that show in the first place. If they’re going to me making stuff up, then make it believable.
dbmcvey
Shaver, I read what you wrote and you’re disgusting.
dbmcvey
Uh-oh! Conservative anti-gay trolls turning on Jonathan Baily now. Conservatives are such snowflakes.
abfab
Don’t question shaver. He moonlights as a gay basher. Shaver—go fu ck yourself.
Mary Jane
Shaver, you must have been unloved by many in your childhood or when you were attempting to attract the guys you liked. Guys have been taking off hats, caps, beanies, and any head coverings, forever, when they are angry, drunk, or looking for a good beatdown. Guys love that–it is a way of pissing.
Fenwick22
I love when Shaver gets called out. That nonsensical self loathing is tired.
cuteguy
This has MAGA written all over it. MAGA is the modern day Nazi Party and needs to be removed immediately from society