rising from the dead

Long Live Ted Haggard: How a Few Brownies + Bibles Resurrected This Pastor

Disgraced Pastor Starting Over

Just three years after getting caught enjoying the company of a male prostitute, preacher Ted Haggard is back and better than ever! Ccookies, pies, and brownies” (and Bibles) awaited guests at the recovering homosexual’s much-anticipated prayer meeting at his home last night. And wouldn’t you know it, people showed up!

Reporters weren’t allowed inside (Haggard addressed them before the Jesusfest got under way), but some 50-plus cars lined the streets. Noting “people love a good comeback story,” Haggard said that “for the people who come tonight, that means they believe in the resurrection in me. Because I died. I was buried.”

Like Jesus. Only that guy nailed boards, not male hookers.