This profile is part of Queerty’s 2023 Out For Good series, recognizing public figures who’ve had the courage to come out and make a difference in the past year.
Name: Kevin Maxen, 31
Bio: Kevin Maxen, the first male NFL coach to publicly come out as gay, was born in suburban Connecticut. Blessed with a bruising build, he played his college ball for Western Connecticut State University, a Division III program in the Massachusetts State Collegiate Athletic Conference.
Maxen shined as a linebacker, playing all 30 games for the team over three seasons, and recording 171 total tackles. He earned first-team defense honors his senior season.
While Maxen’s football identity was secure, he began questioning other aspects of his life, namely his sexuality. But he wasn’t sure whether he would be accepted on the gridiron as an out gay man.
So, the three-season collegiate captain stayed in the closet as he started his coaching career. After graduation, he worked as a strength coach for the teams at Baylor and Vanderbilt. His big professional break came in 2021, when the Jacksonville Jaguars hired him as an associate strength coach.
While Maxen was breaking through on the coaching circuit, he was breaking down personally. Staying in the closet kept eating at him.
“For a while I had such an anger for myself and hatred that I thought was from a fear of what others might think about who I am,” he told Outsports in his coming out interview. “But that wasn’t it. It was an anger and hatred of myself because I put myself in a life where I was living by other people’s rules and not by my own.”
The worst part was always team functions. While other coaches proudly showed off their families and loved ones, Maxen kept his boyfriend of two years hidden from public view.
“You have other coaches who have significant others, and they’re talking about their significant others,” he said. “And I felt guilty that I couldn’t do the same thing, that I was letting myself down. I want the person I’m with to be able to share that with me.”
Coming out: Maxen started his public coming out process in February 2022, when he got in touch with Carl Nassib, the first out gay active NFL player. Nassib, who retired this summer, advised him throughout the process.
With the support of family and friends, Maxen made his announcement in July.
“It wasn’t until recently–and with the immense love and support of my family, my friends, colleagues and peers, and the courage and sacrifice from my partner–that I realized I have the right and responsibility to love and be loved, and that maybe sharing this will hopefully give someone else the strength to accept their own life and take control of their own story,” he said.
Most of all, Maxen was tired of living a lie.
“I don’t want to feel like I have to think about it anymore,” he added. “I don’t want to feel like I have to lie about who I am seeing, or why I am living with someone else.”
When Maxen reported for training camp this summer, he shows up as his true self, and was embraced by everyone in the organization, including owner Shad Khan.
“Kevin is a Jacksonville Jaguar through and through, and a key member of our football team and community,” he said,” via ESPN.
As the Jaguars prepared for the 2023 season, there was no media circus or hoopla. Maxen carried on as usual, focused on getting the team’s players in peak physical condition for the upcoming NFL campaign.
The Jaguars, who won the AFC South in 2022, defeated the rival Indianapolis Colts last week to kick off their season by a score of 31-21. It was their biggest win on the road against their divisional rival since 2017.
Unsurprisingly, Maxen’s sexuality was hardly a distraction.
“As a Black Jew who has dated both men and women, who has been a strength coach at the highest level of professional football, I’ve learned that how I look, what I believe in, and especially who I am physically or emotionally attracted to should not impact the way I or other people view my worth,” he said. “And It should certainly not dictate what I feel I am capable of accomplishing.”
Now out and proud, the sky is the limit.
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Those who came out to make a difference
