Queerty is better as a member

Log in | Register

Scientists Consider Potentially Evil Plot To Save Planet

earthexplodesH.jpg
Earth’s days are totally numbered. Not only are we in the middle of a protracted world war, being ravaged by a tireless retrovirus and watching as millions starve, but the planet seems to be getting hotter everyday. While Al Gore and Leonardo DiCaprio and a slew of other hot stars have joined the Global Warming crusade, some scientists think it may be too late to change earthling’s Earth destructing ways. Rather than spend time educating people on cutting carbon emissions and the such, they’re just going to take control of the weather:

Frustrated with the limits of public policy to tackle global warming, some scientists say the time has come to engineer a way to control the weather.

One idea put forth by a physicist involved in climate-control discussions would involve bombarding the Arctic stratosphere with specially engineered particles to deflect the sun’s rays, thereby lowering temperatures.

Didn’t the evil Carradine Cassadine family have a similar idea on General Hospital?

If soap opera writers can devise such a dastardly plot, we’re sure real life villains could concoct a scheme of their own: a danger not lost on scientists. Colby College professor James Fleming – surprisingly, no relation to James Bond creator, Ian Fleming – remarks: “It is virtually impossible to imagine governments resisting the temptation to explore military uses of any potentially climate-altering technology.” So, we have two choices here: let the ice caps melt, thus flooding the entire world and ending civilization as we know it or try to control the weather and run the risk of being destroyed by some douche bag with designs on world domination. Hmm, we’re going to go with the douche bag option – at least that way you’re guaranteed a planet. It may be run by a psycho monster, but it’s better than sleeping with the fishes, right?

Could Global Warming Be Halted by Controlling the Weather? [WSJ]

By:           Andrew Belonksy
On:           Apr 26, 2007
Tagged: , , ,
  • 3 Comments
    • teddest
      teddest

      it’s the cassidine family. what kind of gay man are you not to know that? c’mon.

      Apr 26, 2007 at 3:43 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Kamasutra Jones
      Kamasutra Jones

      you beat me to the punch, teddest. for the record, it was helena (then played by liz taylor) and her beloved mikos who were going to freeze the planet. luckily that dastardly luke and laura foiled there plot, and thereby becoming the best romantic couple EVER!

      Apr 26, 2007 at 3:59 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • BC
      BC

      Yes, the Cassidines. The Carradines were the Baldwin brothers of the ’70s.

      Apr 26, 2007 at 5:12 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

    Add your Comment

    Please log in to add your comment

    Need an account? Register It's free and easy.



  • QUEERTY DAILY

     


    POPULAR ON QUEERTY


    FROM AROUND THE WEB

    Copyright 2014 Queerty, Inc.
    Follow Queerty at Queerty.com, twitter.com/queerty and facebook.com/queerty.