Billy Porter talks about the clinic visit that led to him learning he was HIV positive

National Black HIV/AIDS Awareness Day took place this week. To mark the occasion, one of the most well-known Black celebrities living with HIV reflected on his own diagnosis.

Actor, singer and director Billy Porter revealed he’s living with HIV in 2021. He received his diagnosis in 2007 but felt too much shame to speak out publicly about it. He was particularly uncomfortable about sharing the news with his mom.

However, it reached a stage when he realized that his mom could live for many more years. He also realized he could do a lot of good by talking about his status. Playing the character of Pray Tell, who lives with HIV, on Pose, also impacted his thinking.

On Tuesday (February 7th) Porter posted a video in which he discussed the damaging impact of shame. It comes from an interview he gave with Drew Barrymore. In the accompanying caption, he revealed how a routine visit to the Callen Lorde clinic in New York City to get a “pimple drained” led to his diagnosis.

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“HIV disproportionately affects Black people and our communities have made great progress in reducing the spread,” he said. “But you have to know so that you can deal with it, process it, and then move in ways to protect yourself and your current and future partners. So please get tested.

“I was always one to get tested. Every six months, as a matter of fact. But when I heard the word ‘positive,’…..

“I had gone to Callen-Lorde to get a pimple drained, and the guy at the reception desk asked if I wanted an HIV test too. ‘They’re only ten dollars,’ he offered. ‘You know what, it’s actually past my usual six months, so yes!’

“The doctor was kind. He checked all my vitals. He checked out my pimple. He administered the HIV test and then disappeared for about twenty minutes.

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A post shared by Billy Porter (@theebillyporter)

“When the doctor returned to the exam room, his energy had shifted. He was solemn. Pensive. I don’t remember much after the word ‘positive’ fell from his mouth. Everything constricted. I stopped breathing. I could see the doctor’s mouth moving. I caught snatches of sentences:

‘It’s not the death sentence it used to be.’
‘Do you have a GP to follow up with?’
‘Everything’s gonna be all right.’

“But would it be?

“I spent the next 14 years hiding this as a secret. I had been shamed into silenced. But no more.

“So, on this #NBHAAD, I urge you to get tested. If you are positive, then please find safe spaces to support you in your journey. You do NOT have to tell anyone but you do have to act responsibly and take good care of yourself. You are important and you have work to do. 🙏🏾”

“Supposed to know better”

Porter first talked about his HIV status in 2021 to the Hollywood Reporter. He said at the time, “I was the generation that was supposed to know better, and it happened anyway.

“It was 2007, the worst year of my life. I was on the precipice of obscurity for about a decade or so, but 2007 was the worst of it. By February, I had been diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes. By March, I signed bankruptcy papers. And by June, I was diagnosed HIV-positive.

“The shame of that time compounded with the shame that had already [accumulated] in my life silenced me, and I have lived with that shame in silence for 14 years.”

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