Stressed about finding some last-minute holiday gifts and don’t know what to get that special man in your life? Well, Instagram ads are a notoriously awful place to look, but there is one going around that you might find helpful if you’re in a squeeze—emphasis on the “squeeze.”
Per Twitter X user @BlackLanterrn, a luxury menswear brand by the name of Dolci Lusso is hawking their eyebrow-raising “Novate Pant,” a pair of wrinkle-free trousers that leave very little to the imagination.
They apparently spotted the slacks via a sponsored ad from the brand on Instagram, took a screenshot, then posted for the world to see on X—to the tune of 11k likes and counting—writing, “Instagram you HAVE to be joking 😵💫.”
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“Who said men shouldn’t have a cute 🍑 too?,” Dolci Lusso writes in the caption (and, seriously, who said that? Because they’re wrong!), hawking that the trouser style is designed to “[lift] and accentuate your butt.”
Talk about a targeted ad!
What we find most amusing is that Dolci Lusso doesn’t appear to be a brand specifically catering to a gay male audience—like, say, Andrew Christian or Mr. Turk—it’s just a line of environmentally conscious clothing with a mission to “redefine fashion by blending contemporary design sensibilities with unmatched craftsmanship,” per their official ABOUT US page.
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But, come on, you’re telling us that they put an absolute beefcake of a man in these ultra slim-fitting pants that hug every single muscle and weren’t intentionally trying to get the gays riled up?
And don’t get us started on the front view, which shows the pant fabric all rippling toward one focus-pulling feature. Is the model even wearing underwear???
Upon closer inspection, two details stand out: One, in the description of the “Novate Pant” on the website, there’s not a single mention of the butt accentuation detail—it’s almost hilarious how much they’re refusing to acknowledge the obvious fact that these trousers are very, very tight.
And, secondly, we can’t seem to find the Dolci Lusso account on Instagram? Even though it’s theoretically right there in @BlackLanterrn’s screenshot? The plot of the thick-thighed model thickens!
We know it’s not a hoax because the brand—and these pants—do exist. We found their official website! It just seems there’s no “paper trail” of their more butt-forward, gay-pandering ad campaign, for whatever reason.
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Regardless, the slacks have caught the attention of Gay Twitter™ and sent their imaginations running wild. “The seams are begging for mercy,” one user joked in reply. “They know their [target] audience,” another keenly observed.
The jokes are flying fast and loose (unlike the trousers), especially as folks share the very specific people and professions who no doubt rock a pari of these calf-hugging bad boys. Check out a few of our favorites below:
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inbama
They look way better on that guy Mark with his pet squirrel peanut.
Jim
IF this catches on (and I have my doubts) this will be a short lived fad
RIGay
Much like “Yoga Pants” have taken over as primary every-day use for the every-female physique, I cannot wait to see these pants take over the male Buddha-esque physiques at Walmart.
Them’s gonna be some hot lookin’ people!
Can you get them in camouflage print?
ggore
The muscle-bunny set will love these, they leap at any chance to show off all the hard work they do after going to the gym 12 days a week. For the rest of us, like yoga pants, they are a classic example of the old adage: “Just because they make them in your size does NOT mean that you should buy them or wear them out in public!”
bachy
The glute-bus is leaving the station! All aboard!
Max
too overt.